Women, do you understand how remarkably wounding you can be to a man? Especially Intellectual men?

If you want a diagnosis, then the problem is that you still have a lot to learn to develop yourself into a man, which is why women are not that into you. At times you sound like you need a mother and not a wife.

If you don't want a diagnosis, but have just come here to vent, then ignore what I said. You do make several good points.

Women are the inferior sex by nature.

[link to www.theabsolute.net]

DESERVES MULTIPLE GOD DAMN BUMPS FOR EQUIVOCAL TRUTH, YOUTH.

My heart goes out to you, OP. I sense your deep sincerity and confusion and frustration. I believe in my heart of hearts that men and women have been insidiously dazed by popular cultural whims and disinformation as to how to build healthy relationships. Many women have been abused by these and dysfunctional families juxtaposed against unrealistic Lifetime Movie Channel/ fairy tale visions of romance. Some look pretty and are wounded inside.

And can we talk about men for a moment? How many do we believe represent the counterpoint ideal of manliness in a world where they may have also suffered neglect, abuse and confusion? How many bring an A game to the table of love? The good ones seem to be snatched up right away and are treasured and nestled in for life. Leaving the wounded and suspicious remnants to fight for the leftovers. Please bear in mind the pressures women are also operating under. Having to fight the same forces of career and survival in a world which seems against them on so many levels. On top of this they are bombarded with added pressures of Cosmopolitan/porn sex-kitten ideals they are supposed to compete with on the relationship front.

If a woman is burned badly enough by some jerk or two, she may need to heal awhile before getting up the nerve to reach out again. The better the woman, the longer this may take. Are you patient, or do you think only of your own needs? A good woman will sense if this is so. And freeze you out, pronto. While sincere, it seems you may be too self-interested. An A-type woman will want someone more giving and well-adjusted. Or feel she will be better on her own. Also, you may be needing to refine your own approach to her. I for one have no time for moody troubled men. They scare me. But we can be friends, if not too draining and not pressured to go where she has already decided to not go with you.

Possible reasons for not reaching out may also be attributed to: Being in healing mode; being already involved or have her sights set on someone else, already; sensing you are not her type; on guard from constantly being hit-on (if she’s attractive, physically, this may be tedious, after awhile); distracted by career priorities; involved in some endeavor which causes her to be temporarily unavailable: some creative or spiritual ordeal. Creativity and sexuality run on the same current. Maybe she is using this force for some consuming creative project.
It may be that you are meeting her at the wrong time. Some women are passionately consumed with some creative goal which causes them to put love on the back burner for awhile. Or she may just be depressed. She may be jaded from having to deal with so many men who play games and/or only want sex – are selfish/shallow. C’mon, now. You know they’re out there and they create trouble for the good men who mean no harm. Maybe she is gay or asexual. Some people are, you know. Maybe her compass is off and she doesn’t recognize a good man. Many men and women are like this.

Aside from this, I believe there can be no better advice than what was delivered by THE INCARNATION(pg. 15 amazing post & every word true)You nailed it so much better than I EVER could. Start with learning what makes yourself peaceful. No one has the ability to give us peace-of-mind if we haven’t already found it within. We must bring this to our own lives through knowing that – first within ourselves and being able to recognize it in another. Having some interest in life which guides our priorities and puts a lift in our own steps. Most women worth their salt want a man who has this inner-knowing of what he wants to do with his life-energies and knows how to fill his days with positive actions/intentions. Not someone to compete/complete, but rather – compliment the direction already in place within himself. A good man isn’t looking for a “fixer” but a compliment of what is already in motion.

If we are not attracting, we need to work on fine-tuning ourselves, first. For me, I think it comes from having passionate goals and interests in life. Many people do not realize the peace that comes from creative activity. The joy of knowing what one wants to do in life, and waking up in anticipation of getting to pursue this one more day. If he is a drinking/drugging/strip-clubbing/TV-addicted/video gaming lazy man without direction, they are not going to attract a healthy mate. They are not happy sorts, they who replace true passion-for-life with temporary pleasures. A healthy woman will sense this and want no part of it. Won’t have time for it. A 10 wants a 10.

Incarnation: phone #?? Just kidding, but you seem the perfect human male. You should write a book for the sexes & let us know when it comes out. Better than John Grey, any day. (though he understands women, at least and is a good place to start)

OP, I wish you well. I know you mean well. Great topic for the times.

Last Edited by Daisypicker on 12/15/2012 10:33 AM