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11:43 PM
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HELP - Is it normal/acceptable for a wife to go through all of husband’s text messages every day?
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[quote:Anonymous Coward 76538212:MV80NzU0NzAxXzg2NjI4Mjk2X0M4MTU4NTQ0] My husband and I use each others phones on a daily basis. No problem. I'm older now but during crazy hormone shifts us ladies can get quite insane and feel extremely insecure. It will eventually blow over, just try to keep any text messages that might start a fight or make her feel insecure deleted off your phone. It's a good thing, after work before you get home, delete your daily text messages and phone call logs. Don't delete everything or that will arise suspicion and cause trouble too. Keep her logs and your buds so it doesn't look like you cleared your entire phone. [/quote]
Original Message
Background - I am married. No infidelity on her or my part. This is a heated point of contention between the two of us. She feels it is normal and acceptable while I am insistent that this breeds mistrust and is beyond unacceptable, beyond normal and beyond unhealthy. I have no interest in getting her to simply agree to stop doing this. I want her not only to stop - but to also realize and acknowledge how incredibly wrong the act is.
As to the act itself. If, at the end of the day (or at any point during the day), your wife made it a habit to take your phone and go through your entire texting history from that day as a point of routine, what would you think?
My wife insists she is only trying to stay informed. I am of the opinion that 99% of the population would think their spouse is suspicious of something if this was a daily habit - be it suspicious of infidelity or other secrets.
All that being said - to be clear - I have no problem with my spouse picking up my phone should a message come in and reading it. I have no problem with my spouse using my phone. I have no problem with my spouse seeing my communication history. I’m talking specifically about the act of going through your message history text by text by text.
In your opinion, would this breed suspicion on the part of a husband? I have nothing to hide, but simultaneously, I think any reasonable person would think that their wife suspects them of something if this was a daily routine.
Both men and women, married and unmarried - please chime in.
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