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Losing my faith. Don't feel the Holy Ghost. My 'spirituality' consists of reading a holy book and praying to an invisible, absent deity
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[quote:MaybeTrollingU:MV81MjQxMjEzXzk2NTM2MjcyXzg2NkQ0NUYy] Well, lets suppose you just don't believe anymore. Will that make you a bad person anymore? I mean, will you start killing, raping and stealing automatically, or will you be pretty much the same? It never was faith that makes you a good person. One does not become "evil" right away by abandoning faith. Actually, to me, getting rid of superstitions and gullibility was the best that ever happened to me. I became more knowledgeable about many aspects of life I used to ignore, I understand much more clearly the idea of religion, including it being necessary for many people. I don't believe you're a bad guy overall, you're just realizing that religion only plays the role of holding one back. [/quote]
Original Message
Man, why couldn't God have planned something better than this for his followers?
So repetitive. So dull. So lifeless. So tired of feeling nothing when I pray. I read the Bible and all I get are creeping doubts that it was put together by men.
How could He be silent and absent for so long? I feel like at this point, the only thing sustaining my faith is my human will to keep trudging along with prayer and Bible reading.
Is the God I pray to really the same God who brought the plagues onto Egypt? Just seems far-fetched at times.
I would love to have faith like Abraham. At least he had God appear to him and converse with him personally. Same as Paul, etc. Faith doesn't seem so courageous and miraculous if you have a personal encounter with God. Me, all I get is a book, praying to the invisible, and thousands of years of God's silence.
I'm not trying to cast doubt onto God. I realize the role sin can have in quenching the sense of God's presence in one's mind and one's life. Just expressing some honest doubts. Just so..tired of the fruitless routine of praying to the invisible and reading a book.
If I ever lose my faith completely..I think I'll hold to it anyway..just because I hate evil and everything this world has come to be. I'm just ready to see God in action..but the longer the silence continues, the more it seems it will never happen.
I have no choice. It's Jesus..or this fallen world filled with wicked people. I will therefore continue on.
2000 years has been a hell of a long time.
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