I joke about that frequently. "They can't have a master plan for me, I'd ruin it."

The question might be better put as something along the following:

a) Were we just experiments with no value other than as guinea pigs?
b) Did they really think they could make a perfectly functional being by putting them through hell?
c) Are the lunatics running the asylum?

But on to my introspective answer:

I always missed feeling loved because I couldn't particularly trust the adults in my life. I wanted that feeling of real connection, craved it, even if being wanted meant my being absolutely devoted even when being absolutely used. I have a very distinct memory, I couldn't tell you if it was a dream or not, but in it I was promised to and promised myself to a man and whatever the hell it was he needed me for during the time he chose to need me..almost an assignment of sorts I suppose? But the point is I was so willing because to me it felt like acceptance and the promise of caring/love. We may be broken, but breaks can be exploited.