So, I have a wedding i am the best man in tomorow...Any advice on the speech??? | |
LogicTroll User ID: 1679362 ![]() 09/29/2011 10:39 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | was just in a wedding, not the best man though, just a groomsman. long story short we were all hammered before the wedding, so inevitably this was the exact speech the best man gave, who was also the groom's brother: people say love is like a rose, but roses die. you know what doesn't die? a potato. (profuse sweating/nervousness/mumbling) so i say get her a potato. you can grow stuff on it. you can make a battery out of it. fuck it, im done. best wedding ever. you can consider this thread: LogicTrolled |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 2181528 ![]() 09/29/2011 10:40 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Pace Maker (OP) User ID: 1501923 ![]() 09/29/2011 10:41 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | was just in a wedding, not the best man though, just a groomsman. long story short we were all hammered before the wedding, so inevitably this was the exact speech the best man gave, who was also the groom's brother: Quoting: LogicTroll people say love is like a rose, but roses die. you know what doesn't die? a potato. (profuse sweating/nervousness/mumbling) so i say get her a potato. you can grow stuff on it. you can make a battery out of it. fuck it, im done. best wedding ever. hahaha. im going to be a bit more sensitive.. haha but that does sound like a fun ass wedding. Hang On Not Done Accelerating A well-regulated Militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms shall not be infringed. (PLEASE Refrain from being a spelling NAZI) |
Pace Maker (OP) User ID: 1501923 ![]() 09/29/2011 10:42 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Most memorable line ever from a best man speech... Quoting: Anonymous Coward 2181528 Guy starts speech with "FORNICATION!!! Oh, um, err, sorry....For this Ocassion...I would like to say..... Brought the house down in hysterics... ya i saw that on youboob. lol Hang On Not Done Accelerating A well-regulated Militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms shall not be infringed. (PLEASE Refrain from being a spelling NAZI) |
skeptic User ID: 1492774 ![]() 09/29/2011 10:44 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | “I would start with a joke, joke—Vince Vaughn quote, obviously…Fred Claus. Talk about ex-girlfriends, quote from Love Actually. Hold back your tears, pause…drop the microphone, get out of that bitch. *explosion noise*” Might work. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 2280652 ![]() 09/29/2011 10:58 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | its love, life, earth changing, shitty world, all mixed together, apart from all above, just tell the couple, both of them are starting a new adventure, which not matter whatever turns to be, to cherih the only experience, cherish the other half of the meaning of being a human. |
Anonymous Coward (OP) User ID: 1501923 ![]() 09/29/2011 11:51 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Earth Daughter User ID: 1543572 ![]() 09/29/2011 11:53 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Let's see... when I got married one of my then husband's friends said, "Ride em hard and put em away wet" at the wedding. All the old ladies were shocked. LOL "Arrows of hate have been shot at me too, but they never hit me, because somehow they belonged to another world, with which I have no connection whatsoever." - Albert Einstein |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1458750 ![]() 09/29/2011 11:55 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I gave a speech where my best friend was marrying a German woman. They lived in London and got married there. Lots off English friends. I am Irish as the name says. I started it by saying I would like to thank the English for having both the Irish and Germans here tonight, considering we both bombed the fuck out of London in two wars. |
Pace Maker (OP) User ID: 1501923 ![]() 09/29/2011 11:58 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I gave a speech where my best friend was marrying a German woman. They lived in London and got married there. Lots off English friends. I am Irish as the name says. Quoting: irishspirit1 I started it by saying I would like to thank the English for having both the Irish and Germans here tonight, considering we both bombed the fuck out of London in two wars. ![]() Hang On Not Done Accelerating A well-regulated Militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms shall not be infringed. (PLEASE Refrain from being a spelling NAZI) |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1379065 ![]() 09/29/2011 11:59 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | This is more of family then friends as me and his family have known each other for maaaany years. I have most of it written and am trying to just memorize key points so it sounds natuaral! Any old best men with advice?? Quoting: Pace Maker Thanks in Advance! keep it short. dont ramble. and speak from heart. that will work best. dont try to be funny as most people aren't. good luck! |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1440319 ![]() 09/29/2011 11:59 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | “I’ve come to the conclusion that Best Man is just a fancy title for a Nanny! And as the Nanny, my main duty was to ensure that the Groom arrived today on time, sober and looking good. Well 2 out of 3 isn’t bad. After all, I’m the Best Man, not a plastic surgeon!” |
Pace Maker (OP) User ID: 1501923 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:00 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Let's see... when I got married one of my then husband's friends said, "Ride em hard and put em away wet" at the wedding. All the old ladies were shocked. LOL Quoting: Earth Daughter i bet they were. lol. im the only one speaking so im a bit nervous which is weird for me because i speak to random people daily in sales. i think im more nervous because they all know me pretty damn well... Hang On Not Done Accelerating A well-regulated Militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms shall not be infringed. (PLEASE Refrain from being a spelling NAZI) |
Frankenstein User ID: 952673 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:00 PM ![]() Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Rowsdower User ID: 1149997 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:01 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Pace Maker (OP) User ID: 1501923 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:01 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | “I’ve come to the conclusion that Best Man is just a fancy title for a Nanny! And as the Nanny, my main duty was to ensure that the Groom arrived today on time, sober and looking good. Well 2 out of 3 isn’t bad. After all, I’m the Best Man, not a plastic surgeon!” Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1440319 ![]() Hang On Not Done Accelerating A well-regulated Militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms shall not be infringed. (PLEASE Refrain from being a spelling NAZI) |
Pace Maker (OP) User ID: 1501923 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:02 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Im the DD for the happy couple.... Hang On Not Done Accelerating A well-regulated Militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms shall not be infringed. (PLEASE Refrain from being a spelling NAZI) |
Pace Maker (OP) User ID: 1501923 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:02 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | So and so are so lucky to have found each other before we all in a catastrophic doom scenario.... Quoting: Rowsdower Oh my I would laugh my ass off if I was in that audience. lol Hang On Not Done Accelerating A well-regulated Militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms shall not be infringed. (PLEASE Refrain from being a spelling NAZI) |
Rasputin User ID: 1843063 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:05 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Hire a pro to write the speech! There are websites that offer stock speeches, as well as people who will draft a personalized one. Want to make a good impression, hire a pro. The movies, have writers. That's why the movies always have "amazing" speeches by best men. Raz |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 651330 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:05 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Luckystrike User ID: 1435886 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:07 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ^^This^^ I made this mistake. Good thing I didn't veer to far off from my rehearsed speech...but people could tell I was lit. Keep it simple and from the heart and be sure to compliment the bride. Last Edited by Luckystrike on 09/29/2011 12:09 PM Everyone needs to believe in something...I believe I'll have another beer. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1440319 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:09 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Start by asking the Bride to put her right hand on the table , and the grooms left and right hands on top of hers. After you speach end it with Now, in case any of you are wondering why I asked groom to place his hand on top of bride, I will tell you now. Grooms name ... as my final role as your Best Man, it has been with great pleasure that I have been able to give you the last five minutes in which you will ever have the upper hand over brides name. |
momma coop User ID: 1306455 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:14 PM ![]() Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | This is something brides like to hear. I have know groom most of my life but since he met bride I have seen him become the great man I always knew he could be. The power is yours. Take it back. In a world where you can choose to be anything, choose to be kind. |
Pace Maker (OP) User ID: 1501923 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:23 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Start by asking the Bride to put her right hand on the table , and the grooms left and right hands on top of hers. After you speach end it with Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1440319 Now, in case any of you are wondering why I asked groom to place his hand on top of bride, I will tell you now. Grooms name ... as my final role as your Best Man, it has been with great pleasure that I have been able to give you the last five minutes in which you will ever have the upper hand over brides name. thats actually really awesome. thanks.! Hang On Not Done Accelerating A well-regulated Militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms shall not be infringed. (PLEASE Refrain from being a spelling NAZI) |
Pace Maker (OP) User ID: 1501923 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:24 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Hire a pro to write the speech! Quoting: Rasputin 1843063 There are websites that offer stock speeches, as well as people who will draft a personalized one. Want to make a good impression, hire a pro. The movies, have writers. That's why the movies always have "amazing" speeches by best men. Raz naw man. its got to be sencere even if i fuck it up... Hang On Not Done Accelerating A well-regulated Militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms shall not be infringed. (PLEASE Refrain from being a spelling NAZI) |
VS User ID: 1520746 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:36 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Ive been a best man 4 times now. 1. i created a slide show with music of the groom throughout the years with embarrassing pictures to show the bride and her family what they were in for. You can also photoshop what he may look like in the future. 2. I gave a list of reasons why I thought the groom was going to make a good husband and one day a great father followed by a list of all his faults 3. I told a story poking fun at the grooms love of food and how during a camping experience i had shaken up a beer can and threw it in the fire where my friend was hunched over cooking hotdogs. the beer exploded he fell backwards but did not let go of those hotdogs. to which i then exclaimed pretend your wife is those hotdogs and dont ever let her go. 4. simple short sweet " wish you both a lifetime of laughter and love, never go to sleep angry and remember to tell each other you love one another every day its all in the delivery. timing is key. dont swear and dont rush it. if your speeding through it no matter how good it is its going to sound horrible. good luck. |
Pace Maker (OP) User ID: 1501923 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:39 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Ive been a best man 4 times now. Quoting: VS 1. i created a slide show with music of the groom throughout the years with embarrassing pictures to show the bride and her family what they were in for. You can also photoshop what he may look like in the future. 2. I gave a list of reasons why I thought the groom was going to make a good husband and one day a great father followed by a list of all his faults 3. I told a story poking fun at the grooms love of food and how during a camping experience i had shaken up a beer can and threw it in the fire where my friend was hunched over cooking hotdogs. the beer exploded he fell backwards but did not let go of those hotdogs. to which i then exclaimed pretend your wife is those hotdogs and dont ever let her go. 4. simple short sweet " wish you both a lifetime of laughter and love, never go to sleep angry and remember to tell each other you love one another every day its all in the delivery. timing is key. dont swear and dont rush it. if your speeding through it no matter how good it is its going to sound horrible. good luck. Awesome Advice. Thank you much!!!! ![]() Hang On Not Done Accelerating A well-regulated Militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms shall not be infringed. (PLEASE Refrain from being a spelling NAZI) |
WhiteLight User ID: 1442241 ![]() 09/29/2011 12:59 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 1494996 ![]() 09/29/2011 01:42 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |