I am a FEMA camp janitor. Ask me a question.

your on the wrong side, pal....

I'm just doing my job like the rest of you. They told me as a joke that if I quit I'll end up being a camper.

How course is the toilet paper?

whats the easiest way to scrape prisoners from the electric fence

Do we still get internet & cable TV?

For campers it's like sandpaper.

That is not part of my job. My task it to keep the campers quarters in order.

Basic cable and dial-up are available for use.

better than nothing!

I forgot to mention that staff phone calls take priority over campers use of dial-up. Also all outgoing and incoming traffic will be heavily censored for National Security.

I'd move and tell no one where u live. Janitor, guard what's the difference?

Why should I hide? I'm doing a national service no? Americans should be grateful that there are people like me that do the dirty work!

Dude, when the dollar collapses, it's going to get ugly.

If it's any consolation campers will be served happy meals every Friday night.

They did briefly mention this to me during orientation. However, they reassured me that they will look after my safety. So I guess I got my bases covered. Hope to see you soon!

W00t! Finally some GOOD news!

ouch well in that case scratch my reservation.

The happy meals are part of the rehabilitation initiative.

I will be sure to leave a creamy steamer in the hallway for you to clean up

You will be assigned to sensitivity training if you do these things.

How many interns do you blow a day?

Since you say dial up is available, will we still be able to surf GLP from within the camp? Can I still listen to the Hawk?

Can I bring my AM radio? I like to catch Coast to Coast, esp when Steve Q is on.

Does this mean since they have a janitor we don't have to do any KP?

wiping up all that jackoff in the men's room must be murder.

glad you're in service OP.

Is the facity fully manned yet?

Is it finished COMPLETLY?

If you find out they are hurting and deheading us will u continue ur duty as janitor?

If they ask u to take a microchip for ur safety and to be part of the staff will u do it?

Are there russian military there?

Have you heard from Mike Rowe?

This is why we in the position we are...there is evil in this world...mental illness...flat out assholes.

This man is janitor not a fkn murderer so how bout u treat with respect and be greatful he putting his head on the line to answer questions.

Do you know the AC that works at the delousing station?

Why are you so calm

I'm highly doubtful that GLP will be allowed. You will be provided with a standard set of items. Anything you bring with you will be held in containment facilities during your visit.