After a UFO encounter, in which her friend had apparently been temporarily possessed by an alien presence, a “Mrs. Butler” of Owatonna, Minnesota was visited at her home by an alleged MIB agent. The man claimed to be Major Richard French of the United States Air Force and that he was there to ask a few questions about UFOs.

Mrs Butler described him as having an olive complexion, a pointed face and hair that was too long for an Air Force officer. He wore a brand new suit (not black but grey) and drove a white Mustang. A later investigation revealed that there really was a Major Richard French serving in the Air Force but that he was nothing like the man who visited Mrs Butler that day. Why he didn’t choose to assume the identity of someone with a less hilarious name is unknown. The license plate of the car was traced to the Minneapolis area but was not owned by the Air Force or Major French.

Long haired imposters driving Mustangs are pretty strange, but the oddest part of Mrs. Butler’s story was the behavior of the Man in Black, er, Grey. When Mrs. Butler commented that not-Major French appeared visibly uncomfortable he claimed that his stomach was bothering him. She then suggested that a bowl of jelly would help ease the pain. Apparently that’s a thing people do. The man said that he would come back for some the next day if it was still bothering him. They finished their conversation and he left.

Stranger still, he did in fact return the next day for his soothing bowl of jelly. Except, he also had to be shown how to eat it. That’s right, he couldn’t figure out how to eat the stuff they give to people recovering from surgery. She said that it was as if he had never seen jelly before. He picked up the bowl and tried to drink it until she ended up showing him how to use a spoon.