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Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate

 
wabishkaeyabe
User ID: 13126479
United States
12/24/2012 07:49 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Op..something good might be coming

be patient..and keep the faith

 Quoting: wildhoney


OP dont waste your life away on something that might be coming.

Stop having faith and get out there and live.

Every-time I "have faith" the Universe sees me as being weak and strips me of something I have to fight to get back later on.

Stop living "the dream" (in your case a nightmare) and start living a real life.

Tell people to fuck off when they annoy you.

Tell people you want to be alone when you do.

Whatever it takes man, cos no one else will do it for you.
 Quoting: Happy Xmas 28731716



I can't do that. I truly want to be a shitty person and blame God and hate the world, but I can't. It would be so much easier to just leave my family with nothing and go off and start my life. I have tried to do it. I was arrested because my mother called the police on me for taking "My" car that I let her use to go see my ex. I could have had her thrown in jail for it but I couldn't bring myself to it. My mother also had my enrollment canceled at my college when I was 18 and the only way I could have gotten it back was by having her arrested. But again I couldn't bring myself to do something so horrible to anyone.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30747832


So, they talked you into it. You're responsible to them and they're not responsible to you. They can do what they want to you but you're an asshole if you do it back to them. I say, fuck it, be an asshole. You have the right.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 30747832
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12/24/2012 07:51 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Read the book of Job. The little pussy ass shit you've been through is nothing compared to real discord.
 Quoting: Chip


Man I have and that has been what kept my faith going as long as it has. Knowing that Job had everything stripped away for nothing other than being the most faithful. But you honestly have no clue what I have been through so don't you dare attempt to act like it. I admit that I'm no Job by any means, but neither am I some 16 year old kid that cries because his dad works all the time. I came here for guidance not pity.
He Is Risen Indeed

User ID: 28631986
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12/24/2012 07:51 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
I've lived your life too, and while the whole idea has crossed my mind way too many times in the past, I decided a long long time ago that after working so hard to stay ahead of that evil wave, to kill myself would probably bring all the evil things and people who worked so hard to get me to kill myself much happiness so I decided to endure and get through it. It helps that I believe in God and Jesus and have found reading the Bible is extremely helpful in times of particular darkness. I am extremely frustrated with how bad things continually are and maybe it makes me stupid, but I just keep going about my life as if I'm going to win it just because they don't deserve watching me fail. Please consider this, I swear to you I've been there, am there and will probably always be wearing your shoes. Praying for you just as I pray for myself. Hang in there...please! The good news is the harder you try to make it good sometimes good stuff slips through anyway and it gets the people who want you to fail really crazy and while they redouble their efforts it gives me great satisfaction I'm OK and going strong. People have found I am probably the most determined, most stubborn person they've ever tried to destroy.
He Is Risen Indeed

User ID: 28631986
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12/24/2012 07:51 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
I've lived your life too, and while the whole idea has crossed my mind way too many times in the past, I decided a long long time ago that after working so hard to stay ahead of that evil wave, to kill myself would probably bring all the evil things and people who worked so hard to get me to kill myself much happiness so I decided to endure and get through it. It helps that I believe in God and Jesus and have found reading the Bible is extremely helpful in times of particular darkness. I am extremely frustrated with how bad things continually are and maybe it makes me stupid, but I just keep going about my life as if I'm going to win it just because they don't deserve watching me fail. Please consider this, I swear to you I've been there, am there and will probably always be wearing your shoes. Praying for you just as I pray for myself. Hang in there...please! The good news is the harder you try to make it good sometimes good stuff slips through anyway and it gets the people who want you to fail really crazy and while they redouble their efforts it gives me great satisfaction I'm OK and going strong. People have found I am probably the most determined, most stubborn person they've ever tried to destroy. Sorry, don't understand how this posted twice.

Last Edited by He Is Risen Indeed on 12/24/2012 07:52 AM
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 30747832
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12/24/2012 07:54 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Op..something good might be coming

be patient..and keep the faith

 Quoting: wildhoney


OP dont waste your life away on something that might be coming.

Stop having faith and get out there and live.

Every-time I "have faith" the Universe sees me as being weak and strips me of something I have to fight to get back later on.

Stop living "the dream" (in your case a nightmare) and start living a real life.

Tell people to fuck off when they annoy you.

Tell people you want to be alone when you do.

Whatever it takes man, cos no one else will do it for you.
 Quoting: Happy Xmas 28731716



I can't do that. I truly want to be a shitty person and blame God and hate the world, but I can't. It would be so much easier to just leave my family with nothing and go off and start my life. I have tried to do it. I was arrested because my mother called the police on me for taking "My" car that I let her use to go see my ex. I could have had her thrown in jail for it but I couldn't bring myself to it. My mother also had my enrollment canceled at my college when I was 18 and the only way I could have gotten it back was by having her arrested. But again I couldn't bring myself to do something so horrible to anyone.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30747832


So, they talked you into it. You're responsible to them and they're not responsible to you. They can do what they want to you but you're an asshole if you do it back to them. I say, fuck it, be an asshole. You have the right.
 Quoting: wabishkaeyabe 13126479


I wish I could but I just can't. I know it sounds like bullshit and I sound like an asshole, and I'm not trying to be some Holier than thou person but I just can't do that no matter what it is. I could never live with myself knowing I attained anything through the suffering of others.
Corn Dog

User ID: 30768292
United States
12/24/2012 07:57 AM

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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Someone above said, "You need a break - give yourself one. " That is very true. You seem to be beating the crap out of yourself mentally. You need to stop. You help your family and you have helped others that you call friends, yet where are they when you need them? You seem like a kind person that has extremely bad luck yet you keep giving. Chances are you have made differences in others lives and have never known it.

Getting a job is really hard now but something will come along. But till one comes along, living in your mind and letting the bad fester only makes things worse. Stop trying to kill yourself, if you are truly with God then you know that is a sin.
KateSask

User ID: 15170057
Canada
12/24/2012 07:57 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Forgive
 Quoting: One Word 19037087


Yourself, then move forward.
.


Candle Lake, CANADA in Pictures ~ [link to www.dennischamberlain.com]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 30356553
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12/24/2012 08:02 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Hi, let me start off by saying my life has been one train wreck after another. My whole childhood was shit. Growing up I've always tried to do the best I can to help those around me. Now I've lost everything. I lost the one girl that made me feel human, which is something I never knew before. I lost all of my friends because of immature acts of fools with Peter Pan Syndrome. My family is so fucking twisted I can't even speak of them without flying into an emotional cocktail of rage and sadness. I have no job now. I got thrown out of school over a technicality. I am slowly losing touch with my faith and with hope. Every day I wake up I wish I hadn't. I beg God for help and guidance and nothing ever comes. I've tried to kill myself 5 times in the past six months and for what ever mystical cruel universal prank I can't. I've spoke to doctors they tell me that nothing is wrong with me and no medication in the world can help. They have tried everything from anti-depressants to mood-stabilizers nothing works. I honestly don't know why the hell I'm even bothering to post anything on here seeing as only about 2% of anyone takes anything seriously. But I guess I have no options. Please, does anyone have any advice what so ever?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30747832


You should really consider going here.
[link to www.saintmeinrad.edu]
geminilion

User ID: 12895036
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12/24/2012 08:02 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
I can think back to a few times in my life where all I wanted to do was die. I think it's part of the human experience that we suffer.

It's how you climb out of the abyss and get back on your feet that counts. Take whatever lessons you have learned and start anew.

I can see that those times in my life where I was at my most desperate helped mold me into who I am, both good and bad.

If you feel the need to hurt yourself or others I hope you can get yourself some help immediately. I am guessing you are young...you still have a lot of life to live.
..."The soul is dyed the color of its thoughts. Think only on those things that are in line with your principles and can bear the light of day. The content of your character is your choice. Day by day, what you choose, what you think, and what you do is who you become. Your integrity is your destiny ... it is the light that guides your way."
Heraclitus
Ozark

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12/24/2012 08:02 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
[link to www.youtube.com]

Faster EFT, really works!
Favorite quote or Haiku,
Nikos Kazantzakis

" I said to the Almond tree, "Sister, speak to me of God..."
And the Almond tree blossomed...
INK3

User ID: 25650162
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12/24/2012 08:03 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Hi OP, I will say prayers for you, but I've found in my own life (and I'm freakin' old :), that if I'm really down, and feel hopeless, it helps enormously to help other people. Do some volunteer work perhaps, and make it such that it's not just once or twice. It will lift your spirits so much!
"When tyrants tremble in their fear, and hear their death knell ringing,
When friends rejoice both far and near, how can I keep from singing"

page7
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 30747832
United States
12/24/2012 08:03 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
I've lived your life too, and while the whole idea has crossed my mind way too many times in the past, I decided a long long time ago that after working so hard to stay ahead of that evil wave, to kill myself would probably bring all the evil things and people who worked so hard to get me to kill myself much happiness so I decided to endure and get through it. It helps that I believe in God and Jesus and have found reading the Bible is extremely helpful in times of particular darkness. I am extremely frustrated with how bad things continually are and maybe it makes me stupid, but I just keep going about my life as if I'm going to win it just because they don't deserve watching me fail. Please consider this, I swear to you I've been there, am there and will probably always be wearing your shoes. Praying for you just as I pray for myself. Hang in there...please! The good news is the harder you try to make it good sometimes good stuff slips through anyway and it gets the people who want you to fail really crazy and while they redouble their efforts it gives me great satisfaction I'm OK and going strong. People have found I am probably the most determined, most stubborn person they've ever tried to destroy.
 Quoting: He Is Risen Indeed


Honestly I felt exactly the way you described yourself for a long time and it helped me get through all of my troubles in the past. But recently I've just hit the wall. It started by me just not being able to play music anymore I had to sell my guitars and drums and now I haven't played for real in 7 months or so. Plus I found someone that made me so happy and made me feel human for the first time ever. She was perfect I loved her with all of my heart, then one day she changed she seemed like she was hiding something from me. She started picking fights over nothing, and she started to push me away. Then I lost her. Not only did I lose her but she went back to her Ex that used to treat her like shit. That was what did it I lost all will to even get up after that and its been months since I lost her. Every morning she is the first thing on my mind and every night she is the last. All of my will and optimism was killed the day she left. I honestly just try to mask it by trying to ignore it but everything I see just reminds me of the pain. I can't even look at another girl without wanting to break down. She killed the part of me that kept me going.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 30766571
Australia
12/24/2012 08:09 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Hi, let me start off by saying my life has been one train wreck after another. My whole childhood was shit. Growing up I've always tried to do the best I can to help those around me. Now I've lost everything. I lost the one girl that made me feel human, which is something I never knew before. I lost all of my friends because of immature acts of fools with Peter Pan Syndrome. My family is so fucking twisted I can't even speak of them without flying into an emotional cocktail of rage and sadness. I have no job now. I got thrown out of school over a technicality. I am slowly losing touch with my faith and with hope. Every day I wake up I wish I hadn't. I beg God for help and guidance and nothing ever comes. I've tried to kill myself 5 times in the past six months and for what ever mystical cruel universal prank I can't. I've spoke to doctors they tell me that nothing is wrong with me and no medication in the world can help. They have tried everything from anti-depressants to mood-stabilizers nothing works. I honestly don't know why the hell I'm even bothering to post anything on here seeing as only about 2% of anyone takes anything seriously. But I guess I have no options. Please, does anyone have any advice what so ever?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30747832


Find a simple, straightforward job. Get a small place, live a quiet life. No parties, no drugs, no drinking. Exercise, eat right. Deliberately let your life calm down. Take a whole year to do this - a whole year to calm down. save some money, keep your expenses minimal. Do not get into any relationships. stay away from family and former friends. Take the year for yourself, and don't try to figure anything out - just let yourself calm down, and rest. Try to spend time in nature. Stay offline as much as possible, and read books instead. You need a break - give yourself one. A year isn't too much, and you'll have your feet on the ground again. And think about God, in whatever way makes you feel loved. If it doesn't make you feel loved, throw it out. One year - give it to yourself as a gift. You deserve the time for yourself.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1610534


Man I've tried that. I live in a place that only has 10,000 people and only about 1000 jobs. Not only that but I live out in the boonies. The nearest business is almost a mile away and they aren't hiring. I've applied everywhere man and no one will hire me. I had a job working scrap metal for less than minimum wage and I lost that because my boss is a fool with money. I have to scrounge just to get by.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30747832


You are not alone. We are all suffering in some way or another and carry pain everywhere we go. Accept things as they are, and keep praying to God for strength to get you through it. hf
AC
User ID: 18477895
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12/24/2012 08:16 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
by sharing your story (OP) so openly I admire your courage. And I am sure many who have read your post do too. I will pray that your burden be lifted and your spirit raised to one of calm and peace.
IRDMT  (OP)

User ID: 30747832
United States
12/24/2012 08:25 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
I adore all of you for your prayers and your help. Thank you truly, even though I still feel like shit I know that there are some people worth going through the trouble of living in this world. Please just do one thing for me, please treat the rest of the world with as much heart and emotion as you all have me, even though some seem not to deserve it.
I love you all. Please don't let this beautiful world turn to shit.
DMT.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
12/24/2012 08:31 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Help others. There are always those less fortunate than you, and it will work miracles in your life, believe me. Buy a meal for a homeless person, bring them a blanket or some clothes. You are infinite.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 4545733
United States
12/24/2012 08:31 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Listen up, OP. I, as a woman, have experienced a similiar story as my life. I was dedicated to god, I thought, I certainly tried my entire life to live as I think God would desire.

I'm almost 70 years old. After being homless I found a tiny apt that is subsidized for seniors. My tiny social security check provides no security whatsoever. Even my two sons have turned their back to me. Seems everyone I ever loved have judged me as an infidel.....hence I am abandoned by my biological family.

I grieved for perhaps a decade. Then I got mad.

I would personally like to hear some anger in your words. I think you've begun to believe that you are not worthy of any good thing. That, my friend, is a lie. If there is a god, you are created in it's image. You are worthy of every good thing.

Don't allow anyone to treat you as though you are worthless.

It's anger that's allowed me to survive. Anger not directed at any one or any thing in particular. Just anger that this world is so unfair and good people are suffering and don't know why.

I set my jaw and told myself, "I will not let the bastards get me down". It works. I live my life mostly as a hermit because I have enormous trust issues. But I respect myself and know in my heart I am not guilty of those things said against me.

I reside in a community that doesn't know me, and this is how I will keep it. I'm friendly, I care about those around me, but I've stopped with the empathy that once was so powerful within me. I'm no longer in a position to help anyone......but I so want you to find that anger and experience the strength that it will bring you.

I wish you, OP, the very, very best that this world has to offer. May you learn to love yourself as much, as you love your neighbor.

May PEACE be yours......you deserve it.
notinfallible

User ID: 30134138
United States
12/24/2012 08:37 AM

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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
I don't know what to tell you really. Start writing about your life, think positive, listen to nature, and listen to music from a genre called, "Hard Trance". It's a sub-genre of techno, but I think it's a lot better than techno.

That's about all i can think of right now.
Brawndo's got electrolytes.
IRDMT  (OP)

User ID: 30747832
United States
12/24/2012 08:44 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Listen up, OP. I, as a woman, have experienced a similiar story as my life. I was dedicated to god, I thought, I certainly tried my entire life to live as I think God would desire.

I'm almost 70 years old. After being homless I found a tiny apt that is subsidized for seniors. My tiny social security check provides no security whatsoever. Even my two sons have turned their back to me. Seems everyone I ever loved have judged me as an infidel.....hence I am abandoned by my biological family.

I grieved for perhaps a decade. Then I got mad.

I would personally like to hear some anger in your words. I think you've begun to believe that you are not worthy of any good thing. That, my friend, is a lie. If there is a god, you are created in it's image. You are worthy of every good thing.

Don't allow anyone to treat you as though you are worthless.

It's anger that's allowed me to survive. Anger not directed at any one or any thing in particular. Just anger that this world is so unfair and good people are suffering and don't know why.

I set my jaw and told myself, "I will not let the bastards get me down". It works. I live my life mostly as a hermit because I have enormous trust issues. But I respect myself and know in my heart I am not guilty of those things said against me.

I reside in a community that doesn't know me, and this is how I will keep it. I'm friendly, I care about those around me, but I've stopped with the empathy that once was so powerful within me. I'm no longer in a position to help anyone......but I so want you to find that anger and experience the strength that it will bring you.

I wish you, OP, the very, very best that this world has to offer. May you learn to love yourself as much, as you love your neighbor.

May PEACE be yours......you deserve it.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 4545733


I am so sorry to hear that Ma'am. Hearing that breaks my heart I truly do wish I could have helped you in anyway possible I am so sorry. I understand that anger may help, I know it is instinctive, but when I do resort to anger it just develops sadness and it breaks my heart. That is one thing I fear almost more than anything, I can't let that happen. The only thing that I feel even remotely makes me human is my compassion and I wouldn't trade that for all of the worlds glory and gold.
IRDMT  (OP)

User ID: 30747832
United States
12/24/2012 08:47 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
I don't know what to tell you really. Start writing about your life, think positive, listen to nature, and listen to music from a genre called, "Hard Trance". It's a sub-genre of techno, but I think it's a lot better than techno.

That's about all i can think of right now.
 Quoting: notinfallible


I am always open minded to music me being a musician at heart and all. What is a band you would recommend? I used to use Adrian Belew, and King Crimson to get through the day.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 30773023
United Kingdom
12/24/2012 09:13 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Try to do things you don't usually do. If doing the same thing over and over brings you no joy why not try something new. Volunteering, helping other people can be very fulfilling. Give it a go, best way to help yourself is to help others.
God bless.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 30264230
United States
12/24/2012 09:23 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
check out this thread I just put together

Thread: Got Soulfly?
Corn Dog

User ID: 30768292
United States
12/24/2012 09:28 AM

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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Listen up, OP. I, as a woman, have experienced a similiar story as my life. I was dedicated to god, I thought, I certainly tried my entire life to live as I think God would desire.

I'm almost 70 years old. After being homless I found a tiny apt that is subsidized for seniors. My tiny social security check provides no security whatsoever. Even my two sons have turned their back to me. Seems everyone I ever loved have judged me as an infidel.....hence I am abandoned by my biological family.

I grieved for perhaps a decade. Then I got mad.

I would personally like to hear some anger in your words. I think you've begun to believe that you are not worthy of any good thing. That, my friend, is a lie. If there is a god, you are created in it's image. You are worthy of every good thing.

Don't allow anyone to treat you as though you are worthless.

It's anger that's allowed me to survive. Anger not directed at any one or any thing in particular. Just anger that this world is so unfair and good people are suffering and don't know why.

I set my jaw and told myself, "I will not let the bastards get me down". It works. I live my life mostly as a hermit because I have enormous trust issues. But I respect myself and know in my heart I am not guilty of those things said against me.

I reside in a community that doesn't know me, and this is how I will keep it. I'm friendly, I care about those around me, but I've stopped with the empathy that once was so powerful within me. I'm no longer in a position to help anyone......but I so want you to find that anger and experience the strength that it will bring you.

I wish you, OP, the very, very best that this world has to offer. May you learn to love yourself as much, as you love your neighbor.

May PEACE be yours......you deserve it.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 4545733
God Bless old ladies. I love the knowledge and truth they bring to the table. This lady has lived life and looks through all the BS and can see what is right, what is just and what is wrong.
Anonymous Coward
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Croatia
12/24/2012 09:36 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Thread: ModernDayMystic

This man can and WILL help you if you ask to. Please write to him what you wrote to us you will not be dissapointed. He has helped me many times in last two months and my life is much better since I've started to talk to this man. Please trust me. I want you all the best and this is my advice. Be strong friend!
Anonymous Coward
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United States
12/24/2012 10:00 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
OP, I feel for you and you are not alone – so many young adults are going through this, and it seems more profound in men in their twenties. Based on your posts it sounds like you may be around this age.

The despair that is taking hold of this group can be debilitating and medication often does not appear to help. A close member of my family is also struggling with the same loss of hope on a deep level, including suicide attempts, hospitalization and medication, with far less traumatic life experiences than you have had to face. Perhaps it is the pain of being ‘awake’ on a planet that functions much like ‘The Matrix’.

Keeping up faith when faced with enormous burdens on every level can be daunting and you are not alone in your frustration: Mother Teresa said, “I know God won't give me anything I can't handle. I just wish he didn't trust me so much.”

From those I’ve seen in this struggle, there is no one answer – and that is no offense to posters who find that their faith in God alone has gotten them through. It comes down to finding a life jacket that fits who a person is at this moment in time. A life jacket, a ladder to climb out of the water, a boat, blankets, warm clothes….sometimes a multi-pronged approach is needed for rescue.

Op, you have said you miss your music, and that is indeed a way to stay in touch with the divine. As a musician it is part of you, so if there is any way to get back to playing or writing even if just for yourself, it may be an important anchor for you. Music turned out to be a life jacket for the person in my family struggling as you are.

Another thing that helped him was the book (also a movie) called ‘The Secret’. It is focused on the power of the mind and the law of attraction. I have not read it myself, but do know that these are concepts that many different spiritual paths have in common and may be another way for you to be in touch with the divine when your faith is at an ebb.

Follow your heart and instincts when it comes to the isolation. There are times it is necessary or even vital. If, however, the lack of connection plugs up who you are, especially as an empathetic person, perhaps volunteering somewhere would be a way to keep that flow open: senior citizens, animals, anywhere that you can experience the exchange of giving that is also so much a part of you.

Lastly - and this may not apply to you - many people find that marijuana brings solace, but for those in this kind of despair it can exacerbate the situation. Others here will disagree with this, yet there are studies that show that newer strains, particularly ‘greenhouse pot’, have chemical compositions that cause the opposite effect of the typical well-being marijuana is supposed to induce. There are some excellent BBC documentaries about this online.

The thread mysterynomore posted may well be true, and I have always believed we are here on earth at this time to witness something extraordinary happen to mankind. The waiting is brutal for many of us who are ‘awake’ – but I truly think it will be joyfully awesome when it arrives.

Hang in there and all the best to you OP.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 13126479
United States
12/24/2012 10:10 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Hey, just want to tell you that i love you - what an awesome beautiful man you are...please don't give up, the world needs you.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 13126479
United States
12/24/2012 10:23 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
after thinking on it, i have to add -

there are those of us who become the crutch for our families, other wise known as enablers.

sometimes the best we can do for them is walk away...

No man or woman deserves a life of slavery...

they got use to you being the responsible one so they could be free to be irresponsible.

the greatest gift you could give them might just be to walk away and force them to do for themselves...

(in a situation myself, so i'm speaking to myself as well)

xo
Ralph--a house dog

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12/24/2012 10:30 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate

Hi, let me start off by saying my life has been one train wreck after another. My whole childhood was shit. Growing up I've always tried to do the best I can to help those around me. Now I've lost everything. I lost the one girl that made me feel human, which is something I never knew before. I lost all of my friends because of immature acts of fools with Peter Pan Syndrome. My family is so fucking twisted I can't even speak of them without flying into an emotional cocktail of rage and sadness. I have no job now. I got thrown out of school over a technicality. I am slowly losing touch with my faith and with hope. Every day I wake up I wish I hadn't. I beg God for help and guidance and nothing ever comes. I've tried to kill myself 5 times in the past six months and for what ever mystical cruel universal prank I can't. I've spoke to doctors they tell me that nothing is wrong with me and no medication in the world can help. They have tried everything from anti-depressants to mood-stabilizers nothing works. I honestly don't know why the hell I'm even bothering to post anything on here seeing as only about 2% of anyone takes anything seriously. But I guess I have no options. Please, does anyone have any advice what so ever?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30747832


Find a simple, straightforward job. Get a small place, live a quiet life. No parties, no drugs, no drinking. Exercise, eat right. Deliberately let your life calm down. Take a whole year to do this - a whole year to calm down. save some money, keep your expenses minimal. Do not get into any relationships. stay away from family and former friends. Take the year for yourself, and don't try to figure anything out - just let yourself calm down, and rest. Try to spend time in nature. Stay offline as much as possible, and read books instead. You need a break - give yourself one. A year isn't too much, and you'll have your feet on the ground again. And think about God, in whatever way makes you feel loved. If it doesn't make you feel loved, throw it out. One year - give it to yourself as a gift. You deserve the time for yourself.
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For starters, this is a good plan OP.

You might also hang a sign that says

"IT'S BETTER TO BE ALONE THAN TO WISH YOU WERE"
"Do Not Go Gentle into that Good Night.....Rage, rage against the dying of the light"-----Dylan Thomas

HIS NAME IS SETH RICH

[link to biblicalselfdefense.com]

[link to forum.1111ers.blog]


Always remember that "for the greater good" will not include YOU.

"Who decides?"
---Robert A. Heinlein


-'Whoever would overthrow the liberty of a nation must begin by subduing the freeness of speech.'—Benjamin Franklin

[link to www.westcoasttruth.com]

The only thing worth paying full retail for is pantyhose.

You cannot do all of the good the world needs, but the world needs all of the good you can do.
natasha77

User ID: 30746409
United States
12/24/2012 10:45 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Honey, I can truly appreciate your situation.
I really can. I live in an inferno of psychopaths, mentally deranged people.
I have a good heart. My whole life is devoted to trying to make peace, cope, make those insane around me smile. It doesn't work.
I have given them "sermons" as to why they should take life easier, enjoy life, bla bla bla...
NOTHING WORKS. But enough about me.

You are going to have to get away from those toxic people.
Plain and simple. So am I.

Do you have relatives someplace else who would give up their couch to you while you look for a job?
Check into that.
Unfortunately I don't see any other solution.

REMEMBER, GOD HELPS THOSE WHO HELP THEMSELVES...meaning, you can pray but YOU have to take action.

So do I.

Good luck.
SPEAK UP. SILENCE IS DEADLY!

I am currently experiencing life at several WTFs per hour.
natasha77

User ID: 30746409
United States
12/24/2012 10:47 AM
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Re: Anyone that could help I'd forever appreciate
Read the book of Job. The little pussy ass shit you've been through is nothing compared to real discord.
 Quoting: Chip


Wow, that's mean.
SPEAK UP. SILENCE IS DEADLY!

I am currently experiencing life at several WTFs per hour.





GLP