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BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!

 
Elisabetta

User ID: 35233389
United States
05/17/2013 01:47 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
i feel like im going to die
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


what ... right now?
911 deception2012inceptio​n85  (OP)

User ID: 20953387
United States
05/17/2013 01:48 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
Its only social phobia because you have fear of others seeing you. seeing you for who, and what you truly are.. being accepted is very important to all of us. no matter what background we come from. the real issue is YOU.
 Quoting: Saggio77 39658790



why should i fear what i am i am good
im just awkward
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


that's not what i meant. being good has nothing to do with this!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 39658790

i feel like people dont accepted me or any body thats digff
Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
Iamaka Canadian

User ID: 12542783
05/17/2013 01:48 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
OP, within yourself, what triggers the fear?
Where does this fear originate from?
Is the fear rational?
Does the fear limit your happiness?

Only you can make the change to dissolve your fears, afterwards you'll be wondering what all the fuss was about.

 Quoting: Iamaka Canadian


the FEAR just comes out of nowhere
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


It's not coming out of nowhere, it's coming from your own mind, and only your mind.

What is the trigger?
Do you fight or flight?

To acknowledge your fearful triggers and learn to respond in healthier ways is the basis of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, which could be an option if your phobia is impacting your happiness enough.
911 deception2012inceptio​n85  (OP)

User ID: 20953387
United States
05/17/2013 01:49 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
i feel like im going to die
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


what ... right now?
 Quoting: Elisabetta


no im not on the bus
Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27250682
United States
05/17/2013 01:49 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
Nothing wrong with being awkward man! Look how awesome this guy is and he's doing it on purpose. No shame man, don't care what people think of you. Seriously

911 deception2012inceptio​n85  (OP)

User ID: 20953387
United States
05/17/2013 01:50 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
OP, within yourself, what triggers the fear?
Where does this fear originate from?
Is the fear rational?
Does the fear limit your happiness?

Only you can make the change to dissolve your fears, afterwards you'll be wondering what all the fuss was about.

 Quoting: Iamaka Canadian


the FEAR just comes out of nowhere
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


It's not coming out of nowhere, it's coming from your own mind, and only your mind.

What is the trigger?
Do you fight or flight?

To acknowledge your fearful triggers and learn to respond in healthier ways is the basis of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, which could be an option if your phobia is impacting your happiness enough.

 Quoting: Iamaka Canadian



so am I insane
Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 21291600
United States
05/17/2013 01:50 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
Any tips how to get over it? 28 yrs old
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


social anxiety is self-absorption from the negative end of the spectrum.

get yourself off your mind.

literally.

it's not about you.

i'm not being mean. i'm telling you the truth.

focus on the other people and when you start putting the focus back on yourself in a negative way, change your focus back to the other person.

get. yourself. off. your. mind.
Elisabetta

User ID: 35233389
United States
05/17/2013 01:50 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
OP, within yourself, what triggers the fear?
Where does this fear originate from?
Is the fear rational?
Does the fear limit your happiness?

Only you can make the change to dissolve your fears, afterwards you'll be wondering what all the fuss was about.

 Quoting: Iamaka Canadian


the FEAR just comes out of nowhere
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


It's not coming out of nowhere, it's coming from your own mind, and only your mind.

What is the trigger?
Do you fight or flight?

To acknowledge your fearful triggers and learn to respond in healthier ways is the basis of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, which could be an option if your phobia is impacting your happiness enough.

 Quoting: Iamaka Canadian


this. its all in your head
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 39658790
United States
05/17/2013 01:51 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
Its only social phobia because you have fear of others seeing you. seeing you for who, and what you truly are.. being accepted is very important to all of us. no matter what background we come from. the real issue is YOU.
 Quoting: Saggio77 39658790



why should i fear what i am i am good
im just awkward
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


that's not what i meant. being good has nothing to do with this!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 39658790


well you just named your fear my friend, you don't want to be seen as awkward. it makes you feel unconformable Yes???
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29925676
United States
05/17/2013 01:51 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
Any tips how to get over it? 28 yrs old
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


You're an empath.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 142629
New Zealand
05/17/2013 01:51 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
Fear and anxiety is normal. You need to develop strength and confidence in your ability to accept and manage your emotional states.
Elisabetta

User ID: 35233389
United States
05/17/2013 01:51 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
i feel like im going to die
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


what ... right now?
 Quoting: Elisabetta


no im not on the bus
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


ohh righhhht

chuckle
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19559810
United States
05/17/2013 01:52 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
most anti depressants will fix your problem op but you'll be trading social anxiety for all the side effects you get from taking an anti depressant those side effects go away after 2 weeks to a month though and the pills are full of fluoride so they dumb you down and make you less afraid of everything too. however you decide to handle it I wish you luck.
ANHEDONIC

User ID: 26795689
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05/17/2013 01:53 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
OP the mental 'chatter' in your head that creates the anxious feeling is all SELF-GENERATED. It's important to recognize that. By no means do those self-generated thoughts/criticisms/judgements represent any external reality as far as what other individuals are actually thinking. I know it's not easy to overcome but you need to realize that those thoughts you are projecting into the minds of others are originating from YOU, not them. You're not a mind-reader.

Truthfully, the large majority of individuals are more concerned about their own business and their own self-image when they are out and about, they are not investing any significant conscious energy focusing on you or any faults that you perceive you may possess.

I have a recommendation. Get an mp3 player or a smartphone and load some relaxing music onto it (classical, ambient, instrumentals, whatever). Get yourself some in-ear headphones and try listening to the relaxing music when you are out and about in public and would otherwise normally feel anxious. When you start to feel anxious just concentrate your thoughts on the audio stimulation, this will distract your over-active mind and stimulate a different region of your brain than the one that is responsible for that excessive mind 'chatter'. Listen at low volumes so you can still be acclimated to and process the other sounds around you and also hear people speak. You can even listen with just one headphone/earphone in one ear if you wanted to be discreet about it. The music will help you become more relaxed in that type of atmosphere and once you become more relaxed you can progress to where you find you do not even need any music or sensory stimulation to keep you calm. It's basically just retraining your brain/mind not to associate the anxious feelings with your social setting. Classical conditioning.

Try it out.

thumbs

Last Edited by WOLF* on 05/17/2013 01:58 AM
The Golden Rule
[link to youtube.com (secure)]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19004483
United States
05/17/2013 01:53 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
Let go and stop giving a fuck. Yes...it's really that easy.
 Quoting: Chip


yep, and if you get a chance, PISS ON THE IRS!!
Iamaka Canadian

User ID: 12542783
05/17/2013 01:55 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
please any drugs or anything to calm me
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


Lexapro 10mg
Lorazepam 1mg


...would likely do the trick for social anxiety, but only temporarily.

Drugs only mask the underlying problem.
YOU have to work towards resolving the fears and triggers held in your own belief structure.
It doesn't happen overnight, and it's not always easy, but like anything, the effort you put in will be YOUR reward in the end.

You also don't have to do it on your own.
There are plenty of resources out there, caring people that will do everything they can to help you out of dark unhappy situation.
Have you ever considered calling a crisis hotline? Those people have more experience, advice, love and care than you might realize.

Drugs and alcohol will only prolong the suffering, especially if you go down the slippery slope of Benzodiazepine abuse.
Saggio77
User ID: 39658790
United States
05/17/2013 01:56 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
i feel like im going to die
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


what ... right now?
 Quoting: Elisabetta



no you dont want to DIE YOU JUST NEED TO TALK. look all of us GLP's here for you look at the post. people do care
911 deception2012inceptio​n85  (OP)

User ID: 20953387
United States
05/17/2013 01:57 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
Let go and stop giving a fuck. Yes...it's really that easy.
 Quoting: Chip


yep, and if you get a chance, PISS ON THE IRS!!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19004483


cool2
Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 37017081
United States
05/17/2013 01:57 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
To relax, take a deep breath...
IN through the nose,
hold it...
and out through the mouth.

Think "I am still"
"I am calm and relaxed"

This works.

Also - take a magnesium supplement.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 4496596
United States
05/17/2013 01:58 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
I have a bit of social anxiety but not to the degree of most people's. what has helped is magic mushrooms though. While on them all barriers seem to disappear. I will continue researching this and magic mushrooms' possible utilization as medicine for anxiety.
911 deception2012inceptio​n85  (OP)

User ID: 20953387
United States
05/17/2013 01:58 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
please any drugs or anything to calm me
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


Lexapro 10mg
Lorazepam 1mg


...would likely do the trick for social anxiety, but only temporarily.

Drugs only mask the underlying problem.
YOU have to work towards resolving the fears and triggers held in your own belief structure.
It doesn't happen overnight, and it's not always easy, but like anything, the effort you put in will be YOUR reward in the end.

You also don't have to do it on your own.
There are plenty of resources out there, caring people that will do everything they can to help you out of dark unhappy situation.
Have you ever considered calling a crisis hotline? Those people have more experience, advice, love and care than you might realize.

Drugs and alcohol will only prolong the suffering, especially if you go down the slippery slope of Benzodiazepine abuse.

 Quoting: Iamaka Canadian



stop taking drugs hate it it kills your soul
Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19004483
United States
05/17/2013 02:00 AM
Report Abusive Post
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
please any drugs or anything to calm me
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


Lexapro 10mg
Lorazepam 1mg


...would likely do the trick for social anxiety, but only temporarily.

Drugs only mask the underlying problem.
YOU have to work towards resolving the fears and triggers held in your own belief structure.
It doesn't happen overnight, and it's not always easy, but like anything, the effort you put in will be YOUR reward in the end.

You also don't have to do it on your own.
There are plenty of resources out there, caring people that will do everything they can to help you out of dark unhappy situation.
Have you ever considered calling a crisis hotline? Those people have more experience, advice, love and care than you might realize.

Drugs and alcohol will only prolong the suffering, especially if you go down the slippery slope of Benzodiazepine abuse.

 Quoting: Iamaka Canadian



stop taking drugs hate it it kills your soul
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


Pill poppers will be the zombies i reckon.
Saggio77
User ID: 39658790
United States
05/17/2013 02:01 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
We all have our story to tell, none more worse than the other. whatever life is throwing at you right now, remember people are still here to help.. even if they are being asses themselves. they to seek the acceptance. LOVE
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19004483
United States
05/17/2013 02:01 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
To relax, take a deep breath...
IN through the nose,
hold it...
and out through the mouth.

Think "I am still"
"I am calm and relaxed"

This works.

Also - take a magnesium supplement.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 37017081


sun, fresh air. fresh water, and fresh food. yum.
Iamaka Canadian

User ID: 12542783
05/17/2013 02:02 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
Any tips how to get over it? 28 yrs old
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


social anxiety is self-absorption from the negative end of the spectrum.

get yourself off your mind.

literally.

it's not about you.

i'm not being mean. i'm telling you the truth.

focus on the other people and when you start putting the focus back on yourself in a negative way, change your focus back to the other person.

get. yourself. off. your. mind.

 Quoting: Salt


^ THIS!

And even if you think "easier said than done", doing nothing at all means your inner-voice is unable to evolve and find some sort of happiness.

Never try, just do!

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy... Look it up, it might just be what you're looking for.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 39939704
United States
05/17/2013 02:03 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
I get panic attacks at night, usually associated with difficulty breathing from say bronchitis.

While the cause is different than yours, I understand the feeling of wanting almost jump out of your skin. Unfortunately, our brains have made this association in a way that to our conscious mind makes no sense, and it really sucks. Id rather have physical pain than a panic attack.

Two thought that might help:

1) Steve Martin suffers panic attacks, and he describes them as being like leg cramps. You feel it coming on, and you think, "Oh F%^K!!", but you know its not going to do damage, and you RIDE IT OUT.

2) When an attack comes on, I DISTRACT myself. Its usually at 3-4am and Im exhausted, but I know if I lie back down it will come back, so.... I get up and read, ususally, the internet. Take your smartphone with you on the bus and READ IT! If you dont have one, get one. If youre like me, it will get you out of that feedback loop.

If that doesnt help, find the distraction that does. Dont give up. ANd as has been said above, keep at it to break up the strength of the pattern - it wont be easy or fun (any more than breaking scar tissue), but you will get there.

And do take Omega-3s. SAMe helps too.

Good Luck!
911 deception2012inceptio​n85  (OP)

User ID: 20953387
United States
05/17/2013 02:05 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
THANKS FOR THE REPLays!!!!! doom gets my mind off of this you cant change doom
Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 21291600
United States
05/17/2013 02:05 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
Any tips how to get over it? 28 yrs old
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


social anxiety is self-absorption from the negative end of the spectrum.

get yourself off your mind.

literally.

it's not about you.

i'm not being mean. i'm telling you the truth.

focus on the other people and when you start putting the focus back on yourself in a negative way, change your focus back to the other person.

get. yourself. off. your. mind.

 Quoting: Salt


^ THIS!

And even if you think "easier said than done", doing nothing at all means your inner-voice is unable to evolve and find some sort of happiness.

Never try, just do!

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy... Look it up, it might just be what you're looking for.

 Quoting: Iamaka Canadian


yes. retraining the mind to switch focus takes lots and lots of practice. try putting a rubber band on your wrist and every time you start focusing on yourself, snap that band to remind yourself that that is stinking thinking.

thought habits can be changed with practice and diligence.
911 deception2012inceptio​n85  (OP)

User ID: 20953387
United States
05/17/2013 02:07 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
Any tips how to get over it? 28 yrs old
 Quoting: 911 deception2012inception85


social anxiety is self-absorption from the negative end of the spectrum.

get yourself off your mind.

literally.

it's not about you.

i'm not being mean. i'm telling you the truth.

focus on the other people and when you start putting the focus back on yourself in a negative way, change your focus back to the other person.

get. yourself. off. your. mind.

 Quoting: Salt


^ THIS!

And even if you think "easier said than done", doing nothing at all means your inner-voice is unable to evolve and find some sort of happiness.

Never try, just do!

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy... Look it up, it might just be what you're looking for.

 Quoting: Iamaka Canadian


yes. retraining the mind to switch focus takes lots and lots of practice. try putting a rubber band on your wrist and every time you start focusing on yourself, snap that band to remind yourself that that is stinking thinking.

thought habits can be changed with practice and diligence.
 Quoting: Salt




lol i do the same for drinking
Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
911 deception2012inceptio​n85  (OP)

User ID: 20953387
United States
05/17/2013 02:11 AM
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Re: BAD Social Anxiety ... HELP!
thanks!cool2
Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.