how to speak proper hillbilly

first
you stick youre neck out real far

second
you stick youre belly out, just like you did youre neck

now youre body is in an s shape

third
stick out youre top pallet like buck teeth

fourth
draw in the bottom pallet to youre neck

fifth
keep youre tongue on the roof of youre mouth
so you can lick youre asshole when done speaking

sixth.....now is the fun part
when you speak, you have to speak from youre neck

preferable from the side of it

do not use youre belly to talk, it defeats the purpose of hillbilly speak

now when you say words in this semi yoga type position

you will begin to understand, why they are called hillbillies

do not worry about youre balls or puss at this point, you cant see them anyways,
as far as you are concerned, youre scrotum and puss are in another country..

an occasional grope will ensure, that you still have them...

dunlaps is very powerful and scarey to the hillbillies..

this is also why you should practice youre hillbilly speak daily...




in the next episode... i will detail how to laugh like a hillbilly