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My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?

 
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 12:48 PM
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My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
She was only his girlfriend at the time and I was young (early 20's they are both a few years older). I obviously never said anything and pretended nothing ever happened when I went over to spend time with my friend. She resented me for turning her down and I felt her masked disdain every time I was in the same room with her. As the years passed I thought less of it and it seemed as if she started letting it go too. They got married and had a child together. Now they are divorcing.

Do I tell him?

I'm thinking no. tomato
lightchild_uk

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09/01/2013 12:51 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
an he says

"If I knew that then, I would have never had married her, why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"You did sleep with her anyway, just admit it"
bigD111

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09/01/2013 12:52 PM

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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
No, it is better to let sleeping dogs lie. Will only cause more pain and distrust.
deplorably republican
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 12:53 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
No, it is better to let sleeping dogs lie. Will only cause more pain and distrust.
 Quoting: bigD111


this
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 12:56 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
an he says

"If I knew that then, I would have never had married her, why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"You did sleep with her anyway, just admit it"
 Quoting: lightchild_uk




I honestly wanted to tell him but knowing her and how manipulative she was, I could guarantee it would only end our friendship.

I know telling him at the time was the best thing to do but again they are both 4 years older and I honestly didn't know how to handle the situation at the time.
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 12:58 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
No, it is better to let sleeping dogs lie. Will only cause more pain and distrust.
 Quoting: bigD111


Agree. Leave it alone. Typically it will come back to bite YOU in the ass. Been there, done that.
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 12:59 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
No, it is better to let sleeping dogs lie. Will only cause more pain and distrust.
 Quoting: bigD111


this
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46124474



I agree.
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:00 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
an he says

"If I knew that then, I would have never had married her, why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"You did sleep with her anyway, just admit it"
 Quoting: lightchild_uk




I honestly wanted to tell him but knowing her and how manipulative she was, I could guarantee it would only end our friendship.

I know telling him at the time was the best thing to do but again they are both 4 years older and I honestly didn't know how to handle the situation at the time.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46125381


Well if you didn't and she is as manipulative as you say she will likely tell him now with the divorce to hurt him and she may even lie and say that you did sleep with her.

Try to stay out of it as much as possible and be prepared for anything.
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:02 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
Yeah tell him so he can say, "You're a shithole human and I should kill you, cause you didn't tell me when it happened."

norespect

I hope he baseball bats your face.
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:02 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
Shut Up!

You may loose your friend.
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:03 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
an he says

"If I knew that then, I would have never had married her, why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"You did sleep with her anyway, just admit it"
 Quoting: lightchild_uk




I honestly wanted to tell him but knowing her and how manipulative she was, I could guarantee it would only end our friendship.

I know telling him at the time was the best thing to do but again they are both 4 years older and I honestly didn't know how to handle the situation at the time.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46125381


Well if you didn't and she is as manipulative as you say she will likely tell him now with the divorce to hurt him and she may even lie and say that you did sleep with her.

Try to stay out of it as much as possible and be prepared for anything.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 45908934


bricks
Garman906

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09/01/2013 01:03 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
What possible good would it do to tell him?
The earth belongs to the animals. We were put here to look after them.
Mr. Reality

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09/01/2013 01:03 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
No need to make him think about more b.s. just let it be. Nature has already split them.
“When injustice becomes law, resistance becomes duty.”

-- Thomas Jefferson

"My 2nd Amendment will Die with Me"

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Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:06 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
No, it is better to let sleeping dogs lie. Will only cause more pain and distrust.
 Quoting: bigD111


Agree!

This is between them, not you, perhaps you might if it was just yesterday but since there is kid(s) involved they need to stay focused on working out the best from a bad situation for their child(ten). All you will do is make things worse, all that she has to do is deny it and the you are out on a limb and may lose a friend in him (losing his trust since he won't believe her and may not believe you turned her down).

Let them sort their deal out and you stay on the sidelines. Everyone will be happier in the end (esp if you aren't being honest and had a fling with her).
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:11 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
Sure dude.

You should be passing that pussy around anyways.
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:11 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
What possible good would it do to tell him?
 Quoting: Garman906


ease my conscience, explain some of the behavior between her and I over the last few years. I agree it's selfish, but that's why I'm asking for advice and obviously not leaning that particular direction.
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:15 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
No, it is better to let sleeping dogs lie. Will only cause more pain and distrust.
 Quoting: bigD111


Agree!

This is between them, not you, perhaps you might if it was just yesterday but since there is kid(s) involved they need to stay focused on working out the best from a bad situation for their child(ten). All you will do is make things worse, all that she has to do is deny it and the you are out on a limb and may lose a friend in him (losing his trust since he won't believe her and may not believe you turned her down).

Let them sort their deal out and you stay on the sidelines. Everyone will be happier in the end (esp if you aren't being honest and had a fling with her).
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 45405354


I think I would feel comfortable telling glp that I had slept with her if I had. But I didn't. I don't like blondes.
Psych

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Netherlands
09/01/2013 01:16 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
Maybe you can try the ol' Hey, I have this friend, and his friend is divorcing his wife...

Please come back to share how that panned out.
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:24 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
I will say this, put yourself in your friends place.

Would you want to know?

I sure as fuck would!

And you should have told him the day it happened.


Years ago, my college roommate went out of town and his girlfriend cheated on him. She pleaded with me not to tell him. And I told her plain and simple, if it were the other way around, wouldn't you want to know? That shut her up. Needless to say, I told him and he dumped her.

Now let's say I had never told him and they got married and had children and the she cheats on him, which is very likely as people who cheat once are prone to do so again. Now he is wasted years of his life with a cheater and even has a child with her. In the long run, what is the best thing to do.

So OP, you should have told him the day it happened, and even though it's late in the game, you should tell him now.
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:25 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
No, it is better to let sleeping dogs lie. Will only cause more pain and distrust.
 Quoting: bigD111


Agree!

This is between them, not you, perhaps you might if it was just yesterday but since there is kid(s) involved they need to stay focused on working out the best from a bad situation for their child(ten). All you will do is make things worse, all that she has to do is deny it and the you are out on a limb and may lose a friend in him (losing his trust since he won't believe her and may not believe you turned her down).

Let them sort their deal out and you stay on the sidelines. Everyone will be happier in the end (esp if you aren't being honest and had a fling with her).
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 45405354


I think I would feel comfortable telling glp that I had slept with her if I had. But I didn't. I don't like blondes.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46126269


So if she would have been a brunette you would have? That's hilarious!
M*walk
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09/01/2013 01:25 PM

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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
No, it is better to let sleeping dogs lie. Will only cause more pain and distrust.
 Quoting: bigD111


jay101
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09/01/2013 01:27 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
C`mon, what`s the point? You`ll just humiliate him and for what? If you`re a friend you`ll suck it up and keep it to yourself.
M*walk
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09/01/2013 01:27 PM

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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
No, it is better to let sleeping dogs lie. Will only cause more pain and distrust.
 Quoting: bigD111


Agree!

This is between them, not you, perhaps you might if it was just yesterday but since there is kid(s) involved they need to stay focused on working out the best from a bad situation for their child(ten). All you will do is make things worse, all that she has to do is deny it and the you are out on a limb and may lose a friend in him (losing his trust since he won't believe her and may not believe you turned her down).

Let them sort their deal out and you stay on the sidelines. Everyone will be happier in the end (esp if you aren't being honest and had a fling with her).
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 45405354


I think I would feel comfortable telling glp that I had slept with her if I had. But I didn't. I don't like blondes.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46126269


So if she would have been a brunette you would have? That's hilarious!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1409758


This post is the new trend in "douchebaggery", dude said NOTHING about doing her if she was a brunette, YOU DID, then blamed him for it. FUCK OFF troll..
Anonymous Coward
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Mexico
09/01/2013 01:28 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
I would hit it ..now !!

hidingbanana2
PulpNews

User ID: 45117153
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09/01/2013 01:28 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
What possible good would it do to tell him?
 Quoting: Garman906


ease my conscience, explain some of the behavior between her and I over the last few years. I agree it's selfish, but that's why I'm asking for advice and obviously not leaning that particular direction.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46126087


If you want to increase the probability of losing your friend, then tell him.

Last Edited by PulpNews on 09/01/2013 01:29 PM
PulpNews
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:28 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
I will say this, put yourself in your friends place.

Would you want to know?

I sure as fuck would!

And you should have told him the day it happened.


Years ago, my college roommate went out of town and his girlfriend cheated on him. She pleaded with me not to tell him. And I told her plain and simple, if it were the other way around, wouldn't you want to know? That shut her up. Needless to say, I told him and he dumped her.

Now let's say I had never told him and they got married and had children and the she cheats on him, which is very likely as people who cheat once are prone to do so again. Now he is wasted years of his life with a cheater and even has a child with her. In the long run, what is the best thing to do.

So OP, you should have told him the day it happened, and even though it's late in the game, you should tell him now.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1409758



I don't think I would want to know after the fact. especially with a kid still involved.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
09/01/2013 01:30 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
...


Agree!

This is between them, not you, perhaps you might if it was just yesterday but since there is kid(s) involved they need to stay focused on working out the best from a bad situation for their child(ten). All you will do is make things worse, all that she has to do is deny it and the you are out on a limb and may lose a friend in him (losing his trust since he won't believe her and may not believe you turned her down).

Let them sort their deal out and you stay on the sidelines. Everyone will be happier in the end (esp if you aren't being honest and had a fling with her).
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 45405354


I think I would feel comfortable telling glp that I had slept with her if I had. But I didn't. I don't like blondes.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46126269


So if she would have been a brunette you would have? That's hilarious!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1409758


This post is the new trend in "douchebaggery", dude said NOTHING about doing her if she was a brunette, YOU DID, then blamed him for it. FUCK OFF troll..
 Quoting: M*walk


Your the troll. I just asked the question. Moran...
Anonymous Coward
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United States
09/01/2013 01:30 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
I will say this, put yourself in your friends place.

Would you want to know?

I sure as fuck would!

And you should have told him the day it happened.


Years ago, my college roommate went out of town and his girlfriend cheated on him. She pleaded with me not to tell him. And I told her plain and simple, if it were the other way around, wouldn't you want to know? That shut her up. Needless to say, I told him and he dumped her.

Now let's say I had never told him and they got married and had children and the she cheats on him, which is very likely as people who cheat once are prone to do so again. Now he is wasted years of his life with a cheater and even has a child with her. In the long run, what is the best thing to do.

So OP, you should have told him the day it happened, and even though it's late in the game, you should tell him now.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1409758



I don't think I would want to know after the fact. especially with a kid still involved.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46126269


Really, are you that weak?
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:31 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
Tell him you're sorry that you didn't nail her but you'll take care of her now.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
09/01/2013 01:31 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
...


Agree!

This is between them, not you, perhaps you might if it was just yesterday but since there is kid(s) involved they need to stay focused on working out the best from a bad situation for their child(ten). All you will do is make things worse, all that she has to do is deny it and the you are out on a limb and may lose a friend in him (losing his trust since he won't believe her and may not believe you turned her down).

Let them sort their deal out and you stay on the sidelines. Everyone will be happier in the end (esp if you aren't being honest and had a fling with her).
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 45405354


I think I would feel comfortable telling glp that I had slept with her if I had. But I didn't. I don't like blondes.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 46126269


So if she would have been a brunette you would have? That's hilarious!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1409758


This post is the new trend in "douchebaggery", dude said NOTHING about doing her if she was a brunette, YOU DID, then blamed him for it. FUCK OFF troll..
 Quoting: M*walk


To be fair, that was the intended joke. But in reality if I was sincerely attracted to a friends girlfriend (not his wife) I would say something and get it out in the open (assuming she had feelings for me).
Anonymous Coward
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09/01/2013 01:31 PM
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Re: My friend is divorcing his wife, can I tell him that she tried to sleep with me year earlier?
You shoulda told him then, asshole. You could have prevented him from marrying a lying slut and now going through a divorce.