I am going to offer a piece of advice that my mama told me long ago. The more negative you come down on her, the more she will rebel and tune you out. Change the tone, change the child.
Sounds simple but it is so very hard to keep your voice and FACE calm when in reality you would like to just slap the crap out of them. Walk away. Go drive around the block or walk it. Driving is better for you can rant and rave and scream and SHE can't hear how much SHE is getting to you. You never let them know they have the upper hand.
In a calm, quiet voice, you tell her the law of the land. Break the law, jail time in her room. No phone, no music, no tv, no computer. School books/work only. Take everything out of her room. Leave the bed, the dresser, the clothes in the closet. Nothing else. If she continues to rebel, take away all clothes but what is needed for 7 days. Nothing more. She wants clean clothes she can wash those.
She is 13, and if you don't nip it in the bud right here and right now, life isn't going to get any better. She loves you. She is there for you. But SHE is trying to be an individual. In this learning mode, YOU have to be the one to force the law but only in your adult mode, not even in the parent mode. Parent yell. Adults stay calm.
She will fight you tooth and nail. Keep a pleasant look on your face but do NOT smile. That is smirking in her mind. Neutral face is best as long as it is pleasant looking. Depending on how long she has been in control, this could take a month to put her back in her place - that of a child and NOT an adult. She will then calm down and can go back to being your friend.
Teen years are hard but if you don't put your foot down right now, she will lose all respect for you. This is why kids treat their parents like crap nowadays. They don't respect their parents.
My 2 cents worth. Take or leave it. Remember only 7 years until she is 20!!!!