I feel this too in the same way
i can't wait for this job of mine to be over so I can take a break, gain some sanity and most importantly do an ENERGETIC CLEANSE

You are literally being HAUNTED by old patterns that manifest in thought and energy...sometimes being "haunted" is the only way for your real self to get through to your meatsack body and tell it to acknowledge reality.

Its especially tough when the reality is unfaithful lover or being played by a pantomiming "lover"....don't have an answer, but i know what works for me...

romantic love is an illusion, created to distract and destroy the human spirit...advertising impossible long term expectations (the feeling of love is fleeting and is purely of this body, it is not a spiritual truth) is a surefire way to devastate the populace and lead them astray.

further, if you can't realize this, as i didn't for a long time, you can't have discipline over your passions (i don't really yet, its the hardest thing in my life)

just because you are feeling hurt doesn't mean its the truth...its just a function of this biological body...

love is just a function of our biological body, its the greatest lie in our popular culture and it has been placed there purposefully