Godlike Productions - Discussion Forum
Users Online Now: 2,244 (Who's On?)Visitors Today: 406,736
Pageviews Today: 1,576,223Threads Today: 607Posts Today: 13,280
05:06 PM


Rate this Thread

Absolute BS Crap Reasonable Nice Amazing
 

Help with Constipation

 
WindyMind

User ID: 7244814
United States
04/18/2014 08:21 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
The thought of someone as fat as your avatar being constipated is disgusting.
Bending Light

User ID: 45168292
United States
04/18/2014 08:32 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
The thought of someone as fat as your avatar being constipated is disgusting.
 Quoting: WindyMind


tommissile
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 47893151
United States
04/18/2014 08:37 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
You do not need Epsom salt. Just use sea salt or non iodized salt 2 teaspoons and 1 quart of warm water. Mix, drink and do not stray far from the head/loo/johnnie/bathroom.

You need to cleanse your gut and colon...5 days is pretty bad.
WindyMind

User ID: 7244814
United States
04/18/2014 08:42 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
How about an enema?

Coffee and a cigarette.

Smooth Move tea by traditional medicinals

Vitamin C to tolerance

Walking a lot


Get yourself a fleets or 2.
eekers
Dreamer of Dreams

User ID: 38137469
United States
04/18/2014 08:47 PM

Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
How about an enema?

Coffee and a cigarette.

Smooth Move tea by traditional medicinals

Vitamin C to tolerance

Walking a lot


Get yourself a fleets or 2.
 Quoting: WindyMind


this is the main reason I miss smoking. for the epic poops!!
"We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time." - T. S. Eliot
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 55450469
United States
04/18/2014 08:49 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
OP,

I am sorry you feel bad. A friend asked me last week the same question you are asking tonight. I told her buy a bottle of Magnesium Citrate at any pharmacy or grocery store. It is a liquid that you drink. Just read the instructions. She was fine in less than three hours.

Peace
Drewisadick
User ID: 15030851
Canada
04/18/2014 08:55 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
Model 3240 ANALEXTRACTOR by Siemens.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 57030368
United States
04/18/2014 08:59 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
[link to www.amazon.com]

This will do it. Read the review.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 57030368
United States
04/18/2014 09:00 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
[link to www.amazon.com]

This will do it. Read the review.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 57030368


Hilarious!
nah™

User ID: 39685812
United States
04/18/2014 09:04 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
When I was pregnant and constipated, my slutty aunt gave me the best advice.

PUT.SOME.DIAL.SOAP.ON.YOUR.FINGER.AND.STICK.IT.IN.YOUR.ASSHOL​E.FOR.THE.CONSTIPATION.

I never tried it to find out if it works but please let us know if it does.
When you find a piece of shit along side the road and you poke it with a stick, what do you expect to find inside of it, gold?
No, it's just going to stink more.
Warrior of Truth

User ID: 50933704
United States
04/18/2014 09:05 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
[link to fixyourgut.com]

Treatment Protocol #10 – Constipation Relief!

Constipation creates multiple problems in the body and can manifest itself in different ways. Constipation can eventually cause toxins to build up in the body from a lack of bowl transit time. Slow moving waste through the colon ferments longer, releases excess toxins into the bloodstream because of constant contact with the intestinal wall, and facilitates a greater growth of both good and opportunistic bacteria. The extra growth of biotics and increased fermentation of waste in the colon eventually produces more gas in the bowels. A patient will eventually develop heartburn because of slow gastric emptying, which is caused by excess pressure and bloating in the abdomen area. This extra added abdominal pressure forces stomach acid through the LES and is the cause of the GERD symptoms. The LES will further weaken. This will cause the patients GERD symptoms to worsen. The patient eventually develops SIBO, leaky gut, greater LES weakness, IBS-C, and stronger GERD. Sadly, all of these medical conditions developed from and spiraled out of control from chronic long term constipation that could have been easily treated before the patient got very ill.

I would consider that you might be suffering from some form of constipation if you aren’t using the bathroom every day, or at the very least every other day. I think that the ideal deification daily count for most people would be twice a day.

The main causes of constipation are lack of dietary magnesium, dehydration, lack of proper fiber intake, prescription drugs that can cause constipation (opiates are a prime example), hypothyroid, adrenal fatigue, and lack of exercise. It is safe to treat constipation yourself as long as your bowels aren’t impacted. If you follow the severe constipation protocol for acute constipation and you still haven’t produced a bowel movement in a few hours then you might have an impacted colon. Report to the hospital if you have severe abdominal pain, or vomited after ingesting food or liquid, if you think you have an impacted bowel. This is a medical emergency and needs be treated by a doctor immediately!

General Constipation Protocol

Basic Constipation Relief Recommendations – Follow for One Month

Walk for at least 30 minutes a Day. Walking helps stimulate bowl movement.

Stay Hydrated – Drink Clean Water – Put 1/4 tsp of good quality sea salt or real salt in a glass of water once a day. Drink at least 64 oz of water a day as long as your kidney function is adequate.

Use a Squatty Potty when you defecate to retrain your body to squat when you use the toilet.
Increase Fiber8

Insoluble Fiber – Choose One: Unifiber – One Tablespoon up to 3 times daily. / Manitoba Harvest Vanilla Hemp Protein – Two Tablespoons Daily.

Food Source Fiber – Choose One: Bananas – Eat two bananas daily. / Avocado – Eat one whole Avocado daily.
Draw More Water Into the Colon

Magnesium Citrate – 600-1,000 mg Daily in Divided Doses With Meals / Recommended Brands: Natural Calm | Other Recommendations: Pure Encapsulations Magnesium Citrate, Now Magnesium Citrate, Life Extension Magnesium Citrate

Ester C – 2,000 mg, 2x A Day
If still constipated in 5 days:

Gaia Herbs Natural Laxative RapidRelief Herbal Tea: Follow Recommended Supplement Instructions

< Magnesium and Vitamin C are osmotic laxatives, make sure you do drink water so you don’t become dehydrated

The fiber recommendations are a combination of insoluble and soluble fiber to bulk up and soften stools.>

Basic Chronic Constipation Relief Recommendations

(Constipation that has been Going on For More Than A Month) – Follow for Two Months

Walk for at least 30 minutes a Day. Walking helps stimulate bowl movement.

Stay Hydrated – Drink Clean Water – Put 1/4 tsp of good quality sea salt or real salt in a glass of water once a day. Drink at least 64 oz of water a day as long as your kidney function is adequate.

Use a Squatty Potty when you defecate to retrain your body to squat when you use the toilet.

Increase Fiber

Soluble Fiber – Choose One (Don’t Use if You have SIBO): Chia – Drink 1 tsp. of Chia Seeds soaked in water for at least 30 minutes for the extra fiber. / Now Acacia Fiber – 1 Tablespoon Daily.

Insoluble Fiber – Choose One: Unifiber – One Tablespoon up to 3 times daily. / Manitoba Harvest Vanilla Hemp Protein – Two Tablespoons Daily.

Food Source Fiber – Choose One: Bananas – Eat two bananas daily. / Avocado – Eat one whole Avocado daily.
Draw More Water Into the Colon

Magnesium Citrate – 600-1,000 mg Daily in Divided Doses With Meals / Recommended Brands: Natural Calm | Other Recommendations: Pure Encapsulations Magnesium Citrate, Now Magnesium Citrate, Life Extension Magnesium Citrate

Ester C – 2,000 mg, 2x A Day
Replace Proper Bacteria in the Colon11 – For Two Weeks

Jarrow-Dophilus Eps – Take Two with A Glass of Filtered Water or Bottle of Water Before Bed for 2 Weeks
Restore Proper Intestine Function Supplements – For a Month

Jarrow Formulas L-Glutamine Powder – 8,000 mg, Take in divided doses, 3x a day on an empty stomach if possible

Life Extension Super Bio-curcumin – Follow General
Supplement Recommendations

Jarrow Formulas N-A-G (Don’t Use if Allergic to Shellfish) – Follow General Supplement Recommendations
If still constipated in 5 days:

Gaia Herbs Natural Laxative RapidRelief Herbal Tea: Follow Recommended Supplement Instructions

< Magnesium and Vitamin C are osmotic laxatives, make sure you do drink water so you don’t become dehydrated

The fiber recommendations are a combination of insoluble and soluble fiber to bulk up and soften stools.

Probiotic might briefly help with proper intestinal function.

L-Glutamine is the most abundant amino acid and helps rebuild both the stomach lining and the gut.12

The Curcumin is used to increase immune cells in the gut and heal excess inflammation.

N-acetylglucosamine is made by the body to increase mucus production in the stomach and gut and to make a protective barrier. >

Severe Constipation Protocol (Follow if No Bowel Movement in a Few Days, Abdominal Pain, Stop immediately If You Vomit and Report to Emergency Room, Use with Caution)


Gaia Herbs Natural Laxative Rapid Relief Herbal Tea: Follow Recommended Supplement Instructions

Magnesium Citrate Liquid (Oral Solution from any Pharmacy) – 1/2 Bottle – 1 Full Bottle, Followed by 3-4 8 oz of Water

Vitamin C Powder – 10,000 – 20,000 Mg

After Bowel Movement Follow Basic Constipation Chronic Relief Protocol


Last Edited by Warrior of Truth on 04/18/2014 09:09 PM
My book Fix Your Gut is available on Amazon for $9.99.
[link to www.amazon.com]

This isn’t your momma’s ebook. This book clocks in at 300 pages and took a year off my life. I put my blood, sweat, and tears in making sure that this ebook is one of the best literary pieces written in regard to digestive health. You want detailed cutting edge information on probiotics and digestive enzymes, BAM, it’s all searchable in an easy to read .epub format.

My website also offers tons of information about magnesium / zinc supplementation, digestive health, and how to help rid yourself of H. pylori and GERD.

www.fixyourgut.com
WindyMind

User ID: 7244814
United States
04/18/2014 09:07 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
How about a colonic. Make sure your done before you leave the office or you may be driving really fast to get to a bathroom.
Warrior of Truth

User ID: 50933704
United States
04/18/2014 09:08 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
Colon irrigations can cause more harm then good.

Last Edited by Warrior of Truth on 04/18/2014 09:09 PM
My book Fix Your Gut is available on Amazon for $9.99.
[link to www.amazon.com]

This isn’t your momma’s ebook. This book clocks in at 300 pages and took a year off my life. I put my blood, sweat, and tears in making sure that this ebook is one of the best literary pieces written in regard to digestive health. You want detailed cutting edge information on probiotics and digestive enzymes, BAM, it’s all searchable in an easy to read .epub format.

My website also offers tons of information about magnesium / zinc supplementation, digestive health, and how to help rid yourself of H. pylori and GERD.

www.fixyourgut.com
Bending Light

User ID: 45168292
United States
04/18/2014 09:08 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
When I was pregnant and constipated, my slutty aunt gave me the best advice.

PUT.SOME.DIAL.SOAP.ON.YOUR.FINGER.AND.STICK.IT.IN.YOUR.ASSHOL​E.FOR.THE.CONSTIPATION.

I never tried it to find out if it works but please let us know if it does.
 Quoting: nah™


4thhorseman

User ID: 15383548
United States
04/18/2014 09:08 PM

Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
How about an enema?

Coffee and a cigarette.

Smooth Move tea by traditional medicinals

Vitamin C to tolerance

Walking a lot


Get yourself a fleets or 2.
 Quoting: WindyMind


this is the main reason I miss smoking. for the epic poops!!
 Quoting: eekers


Damn, Woman!! I'm trying not to picture it..lol
But, this is my favorite, 4hCope and some coffee and sometimes I throw in a few M&Ms for a kicker..

Last Edited by 4thhorseman on 04/18/2014 09:09 PM
Si Vis Pacem, Para Bellum
Vi veri universum vivus vici

"There is nothing more deceptive than an obvious fact".
Arthur Conan Doyle
"Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth".
Arthur Conan Doyle


MOLON LABE
[link to www.usavsus.info]
WindyMind

User ID: 7244814
United States
04/18/2014 09:10 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
Drink a glass of Psyllium (3 tablespoons) in the morning.

Get some wheat grass pills

Interupt all 3 meals for 3 days with 10 wheatgrass pills.

This will end as what is called a snake.

You need a good colon cleanse.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 57030368
United States
04/18/2014 09:40 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
[link to www.amazon.com]

This will do it. Read the review.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 57030368


Hilarious!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 57030368


Anyone?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 55298743
United States
04/18/2014 09:45 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
start eating fermented veggies, raw sauerkraut, pickles,etc. u wont unload right away but it will keep ur pluming flowing after a while. it all depends on how fuked up ur digestive tract and colon is.
WindyMind

User ID: 7244814
United States
04/18/2014 09:46 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
drink a lot of water
CountryPumpkin  (OP)

User ID: 25792098
United States
04/18/2014 09:47 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
First of all, are you passing gas? That will help to determine the extent of the obstruction. You can try docusate sodium, available in OTC form. It's the most common stool softener used in hospitals. Warm fluids help to stimulate peristalsis (the rhythmic movements of the bowels that help to move stool along the intestines). 5 days is a really long time. Personally, I'd say go to the doctor. Are you nauseous? Have you vomited any greenish or yellow fluids? How much have you been able to eat and keep down? I ask all this because unattended constipation can lead to death. A patient that came into the hospital last year had said that he had been constipated for 10 days. He died the next day due to associated complications. I don't want to sound alarmist, but you are either in or near an emergency situation. At the hospital, we are concerned about three days. Five would be considered emergency. Subject to imaging. See a doctor or go to the ER.
 Quoting: Gulfcoaster


I have been to a gastroenterologist concerning this, and some other things. He had me undergo a colonoscpoy earlier this month to check for things and it came back normal. He said I have IBS and gave to me some prescription laxatives and fiber but the laxatives havent been doing nothing for me.

I will call him tomorrow, thanks!
Red on the head, and fire in this thread.
WindyMind

User ID: 7244814
United States
04/18/2014 09:48 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
I think you should lose some weight too.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 56987698
United States
04/18/2014 09:50 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
So this is what the world has come to now?
Elusive Pisces
User ID: 11156436
United States
04/18/2014 10:05 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
If you are constipated, than you are not drinking enough water each day. Soda does not count as water.
What is your regular diet like ?
Are you eating vegetables and fruits every day ?
Stop eating deep fried foods. They cause constipation.
Eat a whole can of beets. Beets detox the colon.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 57030776
United States
04/18/2014 10:12 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
Seriously!

5 days without going is SERIOUS! It could be life threatening.

No kidding around.

Get milk-of-magnesia, shake it well & fill the cap full (the plastic cap it comes with). & drink it.

Then you need to sip a 12 ounce glass of water until it's gone.

I'll post more in a sec...
Bending Light

User ID: 45168292
United States
04/18/2014 10:14 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
OP I think you're full of shit!

cruise
Elusive Pisces
User ID: 11156436
United States
04/18/2014 10:15 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
The thought of someone as fat as your avatar being constipated is disgusting.
 Quoting: WindyMind


Do you enjoy saying mean insults to someone who is not feeling well.? Do you like to hurt people's feelings when they are down.?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 40365949
United States
04/18/2014 10:15 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
Quit eating grain products. No wheat, bread, pasta, corn, etc.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 57030776
United States
04/18/2014 10:16 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
This will make you "go" like a volcano.

No way I can beat around the bush here...it liquifies shit.

You will definately go...or you'll be going to the hospital very soon.

I hope you can take my advice TONIGHT, because tomorrow is day # 6 and you're tredding on dangerous territory!

You should be VERY concerned at day 3.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 40365949
United States
04/18/2014 10:16 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
First of all, are you passing gas? That will help to determine the extent of the obstruction. You can try docusate sodium, available in OTC form. It's the most common stool softener used in hospitals. Warm fluids help to stimulate peristalsis (the rhythmic movements of the bowels that help to move stool along the intestines). 5 days is a really long time. Personally, I'd say go to the doctor. Are you nauseous? Have you vomited any greenish or yellow fluids? How much have you been able to eat and keep down? I ask all this because unattended constipation can lead to death. A patient that came into the hospital last year had said that he had been constipated for 10 days. He died the next day due to associated complications. I don't want to sound alarmist, but you are either in or near an emergency situation. At the hospital, we are concerned about three days. Five would be considered emergency. Subject to imaging. See a doctor or go to the ER.
 Quoting: Gulfcoaster


I have been to a gastroenterologist concerning this, and some other things. He had me undergo a colonoscpoy earlier this month to check for things and it came back normal. He said I have IBS and gave to me some prescription laxatives and fiber but the laxatives havent been doing nothing for me.

I will call him tomorrow, thanks!
 Quoting: CountryPumpkin


IBS is caused mainly by glutten, starches, etc.

Stop eating heavy starches.
Bending Light

User ID: 45168292
United States
04/18/2014 10:17 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Help with Constipation
The thought of someone as fat as your avatar being constipated is disgusting.
 Quoting: WindyMind


Do you enjoy saying mean insults to someone who is not feeling well.? Do you like to hurt people's feelings when they are down.?
 Quoting: Elusive Pisces 11156436


GLP isn't known as a place of kindness

mostly tards and bashers





GLP