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US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion

 
Anonymous Coward
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Ireland
05/15/2014 04:07 AM
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US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
The US military has drawn up plans to fight off an invasion of "evil magic zombies" and other forms of the undead.

Prefaced with the disclaimer "this plan was not actually designed as a joke", CONPLAN 8888 lays out a strategy "to undertake military operations to preserve 'non-zombie' humans from threats posed by a zombie horde".

The 31-page document, obtained by Foreign Policy, lays out the eight types of zombie adversaries the US military may face in the event of an outbreak. They range from space zombies to weaponised zombies and even vegetarian zombies, who eat plants rather than humans and groan "grains" instead of "brains".

It dwells on the threat from evil magic zombies, those created by "some form of occult experimentation in what might otherwise be referred to as 'evil magic'".The 2011 plan also mentions chicken zombies, a genuine phenomenon where chickens are gassed with carbon monoxide and buried "but inexplicably come back to life and dig themselves out".

[link to www.telegraph.co.uk]

How long before Obama appoints a State Witchdoctor?
Anonymous Coward
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05/15/2014 04:07 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
They are gonna need it...


the shit is about to go hot...


get ready the end of the world cometh!
Anonymous Coward
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05/15/2014 04:08 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
we have power over the spirits both good and bad to command at our will...

Get ready God's kingdom cometh!
Anonymous Coward
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United Kingdom
05/15/2014 04:20 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
You people are so fucking dumb! Do anyone of you actually know what the 'zombie' is?

It's a fucking metaphor for the dumb brainless American consumers!

So when you hear the military is running 'zombie' scenarios it means they are running scenarios against the dumb American consumers.

Fuck, you guys are really as dumb as the consumers (zombies) portrayed in George Romero's zombie movies.

Get a fucking brain!
aradriel

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Russian Federation
05/15/2014 04:30 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
It's a fucking metaphor for the dumb brainless American consumers!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 51976818


not exactly and not only

they prepare to apocaliptic events

Last Edited by aradriel on 05/15/2014 04:31 AM
Anonymous Coward
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United States
05/15/2014 04:33 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
You people are so fucking dumb! Do anyone of you actually know what the 'zombie' is?

It's a fucking metaphor for the dumb brainless American consumers!

So when you hear the military is running 'zombie' scenarios it means they are running scenarios against the dumb American consumers.

Fuck, you guys are really as dumb as the consumers (zombies) portrayed in George Romero's zombie movies.

Get a fucking brain!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 51976818


we are not dumb and not affraid... they will lose and lose badly...

we are legion, we do not forgive, we do not forget...

thy Judgement cometh...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 50006593
United States
05/15/2014 04:35 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
Once the EMP hits and no one can get their SSRI drugs we're all fucked with our pants on. Countrywide rage-out.
Anonymous Coward
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05/15/2014 04:36 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
Once the EMP hits and no one can get their SSRI drugs we're all fucked with our pants on. Countrywide rage-out.
 Quoting: calx


it will work to our advantage..
Anonymous Coward
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United States
05/15/2014 04:40 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
do you people read ???

a joke, the document is intended as an exercise in drawing up planning documents for training purposes, rather than a real-life strategy.

Its authors noted that the general public sometimes "mistakenly believes that a fictional training scenario is actually a real plan" so they opted for "a completely-impossible scenario that could never be mistaken".
Anonymous Coward
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United States
05/15/2014 04:41 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
do you people read ???

a joke, the document is intended as an exercise in drawing up planning documents for training purposes, rather than a real-life strategy.

Its authors noted that the general public sometimes "mistakenly believes that a fictional training scenario is actually a real plan" so they opted for "a completely-impossible scenario that could never be mistaken".
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1689971


bullshit...


we know and its fucking time!
Anonymous Coward
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United States
05/15/2014 04:45 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
Anonymous Coward
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United States
05/15/2014 04:47 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
The End of the Rockefeller Demon Family draweth near!

The Hell that is about to be unleashed you blow you away!
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 58091001
Ireland
05/15/2014 04:47 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
do you people read ???

a joke, the document is intended as an exercise in drawing up planning documents for training purposes, rather than a real-life strategy.

Its authors noted that the general public sometimes "mistakenly believes that a fictional training scenario is actually a real plan" so they opted for "a completely-impossible scenario that could never be mistaken".
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1689971


Ask yourself - why would the Army spend money, time and resources training for a "completely impossible scenario"?? What would be the point?
Anonymous Coward
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United States
05/15/2014 04:50 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
Michael and his Archangels cometh! the time is now!

its no Joke!
Anonymous Coward
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United States
05/15/2014 04:52 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
do you people read ???

a joke, the document is intended as an exercise in drawing up planning documents for training purposes, rather than a real-life strategy.

Its authors noted that the general public sometimes "mistakenly believes that a fictional training scenario is actually a real plan" so they opted for "a completely-impossible scenario that could never be mistaken".
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1689971


yah this isn't real.

[link to communities.washingtontimes.com]
Anonymous Coward
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05/15/2014 04:54 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
And there was war in heaven: Michael and his angels fought against the dragon; and the dragon fought and his angels,
Anonymous Coward
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05/15/2014 04:56 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
And there was war in heaven: Michael and his angels fought against the dragon; and the dragon fought and his angels,
And prevailed not
; neither was their place found any more in heaven. 9And the great dragon was cast out, that old serpent, called the Devil, and Satan, which deceiveth the whole world: he was cast out into the earth, and his angels were cast out with him. 10And I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, Now is come salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of his Christ: for the accuser of our brethren is cast down, which accused them before our God day and night.
Anonymous Coward
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05/15/2014 04:56 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
Now you are going to see the real Change!
This1000xThis

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05/15/2014 04:59 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
Zombie = Hungry, afraid and helpless Americans that need aid.

They are training soldiers to be ready to kill barely functioning human beings... such as people needing aid after not eating for weeks...
Anonymous Coward
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05/15/2014 05:03 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
In that day the LORD with his sore and great and strong sword shall punish leviathan the piercing serpent, even leviathan that crooked serpent; and he shall slay the dragon that is in the sea.
Hijinnx

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05/15/2014 05:20 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
:wtfmagiczombie:
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 48910873
Japan
06/05/2014 12:02 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
do you people read ???

a joke, the document is intended as an exercise in drawing up planning documents for training purposes, rather than a real-life strategy.

Its authors noted that the general public sometimes "mistakenly believes that a fictional training scenario is actually a real plan" so they opted for "a completely-impossible scenario that could never be mistaken".
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1689971


Ask yourself - why would the Army spend money, time and resources training for a "completely impossible scenario"?? What would be the point?
 Quoting: Tess2012


zombie is code. the zombies are the public. they are intentionally trying to turn us all into a bunch of zombies before they make war against us. Kind of like get the enemy soldiers drunk before you attack them. we are the zombies in their eyes.
Anonymous Coward
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06/05/2014 12:07 AM
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Re: US draws up plans to fight off zombie invasion
The US military has drawn up plans to fight off an invasion of "evil magic zombies" and other forms of the undead.

Prefaced with the disclaimer "this plan was not actually designed as a joke", CONPLAN 8888 lays out a strategy "to undertake military operations to preserve 'non-zombie' humans from threats posed by a zombie horde".

The 31-page document, obtained by Foreign Policy, lays out the eight types of zombie adversaries the US military may face in the event of an outbreak. They range from space zombies to weaponised zombies and even vegetarian zombies, who eat plants rather than humans and groan "grains" instead of "brains".

It dwells on the threat from evil magic zombies, those created by "some form of occult experimentation in what might otherwise be referred to as 'evil magic'".The 2011 plan also mentions chicken zombies, a genuine phenomenon where chickens are gassed with carbon monoxide and buried "but inexplicably come back to life and dig themselves out".

[link to www.telegraph.co.uk]

How long before Obama appoints a State Witchdoctor?
 Quoting: Tess2012


now you know you have a bad ass military..that plans for zombies.im in.rockon





GLP