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Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella

 
PhotinoBird
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06/20/2014 05:09 PM
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Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella
[link to metro.co.uk]

So much weird news articles today. I'll stop posting after this last one. Promise.


A man dubbed the ‘Swiss Cheese Pervert’ has pleaded guilty to driving around town and offering women money to put the dairy product on his genitals.

Christopher Pagano, 42, from Pennsylvania, was photographed by several of his female victims with his pants down dangling the cheese over his privates.

‘I love the way Swiss cheese feels against my penis,’ he wrote in a message to one woman online, the court heard.

‘Either as slices of Swiss cheese being wrapped around my penis or a chunk of Swiss cheese being rubbed against my penis.’

But the biggest shock during the hearing came when the court heard Pagano doesn’t actually like eating cheese (except for mozzarella)...50% rule
Anonymous Coward
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06/20/2014 05:13 PM
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Re: Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella
Swiss cheese is a gateway cheese.. Soon he'll be fucking provalone, then ricotta... Its a slippery slope.
PhotinoBird  (OP)

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06/20/2014 05:14 PM
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Re: Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella
Swiss cheese is a gateway cheese.. Soon he'll be fucking provalone, then ricotta... Its a slippery slope.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 40687438


Bane all the cheeses!

For the children.
Anonymous Coward
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06/20/2014 05:18 PM
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Re: Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella
Honkies gonna honk
ceawaves

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06/20/2014 05:18 PM
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Re: Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella
Did yall know mozzarella comes from water buffalo?
That's down right baffling!
Anonymous Coward
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06/20/2014 05:19 PM
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Re: Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella
Not to mention the sexually transmitted cheeses..
ceawaves

User ID: 20638744
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06/20/2014 05:21 PM
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Re: Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella
Not to mention the sexually transmitted cheeses..
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 40687438


Oh lard!!!!
Anonymous Coward
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06/20/2014 05:21 PM
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Re: Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella
"Pagano" sounds like the name of an italian cheese company

Pagano's...the zestiest!
PhotinoBird  (OP)

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06/20/2014 05:38 PM
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Re: Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella
Not to mention the sexually transmitted cheeses..
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 40687438


Oh lard!!!!
 Quoting: ceawaves


Cheesus Christ!
Judge Wimpy

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06/20/2014 05:41 PM
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Re: Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella
Why did he have to pay?

That seems like something people would agree to do for the story telling.

Oh right, people don't tell stories anymore, since the bars closed and the internet stopped being anonymous.
The President is an employee. His boss is the tax payer.
ceawaves

User ID: 20638744
United States
06/20/2014 05:43 PM
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Re: Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella
Not to mention the sexually transmitted cheeses..
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 40687438


Oh lard!!!!
 Quoting: ceawaves


Cheesus Christ!
 Quoting: PhotinoBird


Real question: who milks the water buffalo?
they could be the guilty parties spreading tainted cheeses..
;)
Anonymous Coward
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Switzerland
06/20/2014 06:14 PM
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Re: Notorious Swiss Cheese Pervert pleads guilty but says he only eats mozzarella
The guys ethnic background must have been curdish.

I'll bet he doesn't even know the whey.





GLP