The VOID

I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the World..



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this is not mysterious to us we are feeling the emotional values that causes its meaning to us

global moment

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Good video so far. Sums it up well.

Between game theory and the epistemological study of ontology ; that would be highly dubious.

Even in our reflections of primal conciousness it is portrayed as seeking meaning while watching it's lesser creations seek to control the uncontrollable.

Haven't I applied enough simple metaphors to illustrate the point over the past decade?


What is chilling is that and what we entertain is a reflection of our deepest beliefs.

My favorite Tysonism: Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face.


Does anyone believe the west has sold its most destructive tech to the SCO or that they have solely created paper dragons and bears in the media??

It is not nations that stand between humankind and peace: It is the mindset of seperatism and need to be worshipped.

Posting this for you seer.

Hey, look who's at my work right now
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Or...this potentially?

I also heard him talking about the couple who run BTS (this rehab), he wants to make a show about their story. Also this is the director of lost and game of thrones.

I may be pulling back from posting for awhile. Perhaps indefinitely..depending.


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Hey Seer777 and all, any of you gonna purchase and play Half-Life: Alyx?

Thread: Half Life is back!!!!!!!!!!!


I think I got a complete collection of Half-Life games on my gaming steam, but I haven't re-play any of it for years now. I might install steam on this Linux and see if any of those games can run on it sometime at later time. After all of that, if it re-spark my interest in HL then I will probably purchase and play HL: Alyx. Though, I still would go for the PC version without VR because I don't have any VR stuff.

HL games are what turned me into a gamer for many years till a few recent years I sort of slowed down.

this track popped in my head today as i was working on my tree's wheels

i thought it odd because i never listen to G'n'R and probably haven't heard it played for many years, and also because it wasn't actually raining...

Good call!!

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Good Evening Seer.

Hope you're doing well Seer.

Do miss pondering your posts.

Take care of yourself if you decide not to be active around these parts

Thanks hon.

I've had a very traumatic week but we're seeing some good progress, thankfully.


Sudden grief really turns the volume down, on everything else.

The color, joy and lust for life, dissolved in one horrible moment. Food tasted like ashes, when I was able to eat.


With that said, the color has slowly been coming back with each day. Small victories offer hope.

I'm sure I'll be around. I just needed to focus totally on self care, care for my partner, and our dog. This week is one big blur.


Eventual grief, will always be the cost of Love, one way or another. Hurts worse than any can imagine, that havent been through it.

That why I don't and won't give my heart easily..and keep people at arm's length. Might help explain my semi-cold demeanor, as I've experience it, more than once.

Happy congraduations on page 211!

Thanks. I'm looking forward to getting home, kissing my dog and my partner, and cracking a beer.

Soon.

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it feels..and it feels like..Heaven's so far away..

and it feels and it feels like, the world has grown cold..now that you've gone away..

you know you're getting old when bands are recording covers of songs released when you were in high school...

I'm unaware of the specifics...but let me just say I empathize and sympathize.

It's a difficult situation, if not impossible, for one to understand until they have experienced a big loss.

I understand where you're coming from, and honestly likely have similar programming running in the background...double edged sword if ever there was one.

Glad to hear the situation is improving at least. Sounds like you were utterly right in taking that time for yourself, and your family. Sometimes it's exactly what's needed.

Be well Seer, and hope to chat again

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Last Sunday while I was at Market, my partner texted me to tell me that our dog was sick, had thrown up twice and was acting funny. I told him to take him to the vet but he thought he was just sick.

Being he is a Doxie I immediately suspected his back and suggested as such, but since it was Sunday the vets were closed.

On Monday, we took him in and were given an anti inflammatory and pain killer and told to watch out for foot dragging.

The next morning we woke up to partially paralyzed dog. He was no longer able to walk right and when we took him out to poop, he fell over. It was the beginning of a flood of tears and the very real possibility we were going to lose our dog and the only source of true joy and comfort I have.

We made another appointment, and took him in as soon we could which was 3:45.

By 5pm, we were told we had 1 hour to come up with $10,000 for emergency surgery. While we could swing a few thousand in that time, no way could we pull that together.

Such that, we took him home and cried more. This was Tuesday.


We were given the option to treat him 'medically'. Which was strict crating and his meds for up to 4 months..

By Wednesday he no longer had control of his bladder which just leaked constantly. We changed his bedding probably..12 times, cleaning him with wet wipes, while being sure careful to move him little as possible..

We cried..a lot. Like where you feel all your joy has been sucked out and the void left over, is nothing but unending pain and grief.. That was a bad day.


By Thursday morning, Thanksgiving, my partner noticed he had held his bladder all night, which gave us our first ray of real hope.

We were told not to move him from the crate, so he held his bladder as best he could and only went in his crate when he couldn't hold it anymore. Which he hated. Horrible to watch.

Friday more of the same. On Saturday and on the vets advice, we were told to get him out of the crate and with an assist band, let him walk around(like wheelbarrow). After 4 days he finally pooped which was like coming upon a clear stream of water in the middle of the desert.

Saturday and today he has been free standing. Wagging his tail..and is showing further improvement.

We had had a ton of support from friends and family some of which have nursed their own dachshunds back from total paralysis.

..So we are very hopeful. He is not incontinent any longer, poops/pees and can walk and stand sometimes. He is wobbly. We still have a week left of the anti-inflammatory which will hopefully continue to restore his function.

He is only 5 and is very healthy, and fit.

Miracles do happen.


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<3