Going through a divorce. Need support. | |
Coppercoal User ID: 60466790 United States 02/14/2016 07:02 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Put your trust in Jesus! Read the book of John. Get to know the Savior! If you don't feel like reading. You can watch a dramatization of the Book of John word for word here: You are loved. Seek out the creator God! The big shots tried to hold it back; Fools tried to wish it away The hopeful depend on a world without end; Whatever the hopeless may say |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 70690468 United States 02/14/2016 07:04 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 71429620 United States 02/14/2016 07:04 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
LadyJayne User ID: 71188120 United States 02/14/2016 07:09 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | been there, done that. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71429620 This too shall pass. But for the love of God, DO NOT jump into another relationship right away. Get to know yourself again. Get back on your feet. Agreed. Today would have been my 32nd wedding anniversary. DON'T go from the frying pan into the fire. Be with yourself, get to know you and what you really want and need for a Good Long Time. Personally, having been there, I have chosen to remain single. BEST THING EVER. But it took a good 10 years for me to begin to get over it....and I am still not over it. Single 20 years. No Regrets. Last Edited by LadyJayne on 02/14/2016 07:09 PM LadyJayne |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 61039764 Netherlands 02/14/2016 07:10 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 68792215 United States 02/14/2016 07:12 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I know I will probably get a lot of negative comments, but hopefully there's someone out there who can give me good advice to help me get through this really hard time in my life. Quoting: Quetzal785 Why does it feel like my world is coming to an end? Can someone help heal this pain? Because you've felt all your upbringing and social value depended on pleasing and being valued by a woman. Now, that's changed, and it's time to look to yourself. Yes, it will be scary to swallow that red pill, but each day that goes by you better yourself and see you really didn't need another woman for complete happiness. Good luck, and remember there's a lot more unhappy women than men out there today. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 70579162 United States 02/14/2016 07:13 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I know I will probably get a lot of negative comments, but hopefully there's someone out there who can give me good advice to help me get through this really hard time in my life. Quoting: Quetzal785 Why does it feel like my world is coming to an end? Can someone help heal this pain? Going through a divorce is a bitch, but once the proceedings are done, and you're out of $16,000 that the lawyer now has...you will be fine. I was, and I am happier now than ever. (32 year marriage that I endured..."for the kids") |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 62440829 United States 02/14/2016 07:16 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I would be getting a divorce to be with my 34 year old mistress, I'm 48. Half your age plus 7 is the rule right :-) Can't because of financial situations, I we go on the occasional date with the 34 y/o and my wife is like my roommate now. We get along and understand that we're just not in love anymore after 25 years together. In a year the finances should be straightened out and we'll formally divorce. It may be a blessing in disguise, don't view it all as negative. The biggest hit is in the wallet. Unless you were pussy whipped and think this is the only women in the world for you. I have news for you brother SHE IS NOT! There are 3.5 billion women in the world, it you want one they're out there. |
Azila_Again User ID: 70580194 United States 02/14/2016 07:17 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | been there, done that. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71429620 This too shall pass. But for the love of God, DO NOT jump into another relationship right away. Get to know yourself again. Get back on your feet. Agreed. Today would have been my 32nd wedding anniversary. DON'T go from the frying pan into the fire. Be with yourself, get to know you and what you really want and need for a Good Long Time. Personally, having been there, I have chosen to remain single. BEST THING EVER. But it took a good 10 years for me to begin to get over it....and I am still not over it. Single 20 years. No Regrets. Not been single 20 years, more like 10. It does get lonely at times, but when I think back on being in a toxic marriage, alone is better. This is a great time for you to really learn about yourself without the influence of another. It can be liberating if you allow. I have always preferred to be partnered. Yet, am ok with not being so if it's not the right person. Pray, peace is not as far away as you might think. If they say it's true, it probably isn't. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 70640434 United States 02/14/2016 07:18 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 17621389 United States 02/14/2016 07:33 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Why does it feel like my world is coming to an end? Can someone help heal this pain? Quoting: Quetzal785 Well because your life revolved around those former circumstances being present - and now that those circumstances have come to an end, you'll need to allow yourself the necessary time to adjust to the new scenery and develop new reference points... "When one door closes, another one opens" Letting go of the 'old' is not easy, but this paves the way for something new to enter your life... On to the next phase of your life... |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 53558235 United States 02/14/2016 07:36 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I know I will probably get a lot of negative comments, but hopefully there's someone out there who can give me good advice to help me get through this really hard time in my life. Quoting: Quetzal785 Why does it feel like my world is coming to an end? Can someone help heal this pain? 1.) Lawyer up, especially if kids are involved. Consultation is free. 2.) STAY AWAY from drugs & alcohol. Don't substitute something you thought was a positive, with a negative. D&A have no benefit to your life right now and will take you down a very dark path, no matter how much in control you feel. 3.) Start working out. Exercise releases endorphins in your brain that helps put you in a better mood and feel good about yourself. Not only that, the positive changes your body, confidence & attitude make will help draw other people to you like a magnet and eventually have more friends and get laid a lot more often, thus feeling much better about not being stuck in some crappy one-sided relationship. Boom. |
Imp User ID: 69548916 United States 02/14/2016 07:36 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Congrats! hey, if it wasn't working, then this is a good thing! i promise you, you will agree with me someday. so just agree today. been there, done that, found the right wife. Only took five years after my divorce to find the right person... had fun, and frustration, looking. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 70059804 United States 02/14/2016 07:37 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I know I will probably get a lot of negative comments, but hopefully there's someone out there who can give me good advice to help me get through this really hard time in my life. Quoting: Quetzal785 Why does it feel like my world is coming to an end? Can someone help heal this pain? 1.) Lawyer up, especially if kids are involved. Consultation is free. 2.) STAY AWAY from drugs & alcohol. Don't substitute something you thought was a positive, with a negative. D&A have no benefit to your life right now and will take you down a very dark path, no matter how much in control you feel. 3.) Start working out. Exercise releases endorphins in your brain that helps put you in a better mood and feel good about yourself. Not only that, the positive changes your body, confidence & attitude make will help draw other people to you like a magnet and eventually have more friends and get laid a lot more often, thus feeling much better about not being stuck in some crappy one-sided relationship. Boom. ^^^ This! Best advice you can ever get. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 69428372 Canada 02/14/2016 07:40 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Azila_Again User ID: 70580194 United States 02/14/2016 08:04 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Why does it feel like my world is coming to an end? Can someone help heal this pain? Quoting: Quetzal785 Well because your life revolved around those former circumstances being present - and now that those circumstances have come to an end, you'll need to allow yourself the necessary time to adjust to the new scenery and develop new reference points... "When one door closes, another one opens" Letting go of the 'old' is not easy, but this paves the way for something new to enter your life... On to the next phase of your life... Right. I never felt like my world was coming to an end. It was my routine (which good or bad) was coming to an end. Change is always frightening. You will make it. You need this change to get to a better place. Don't fear it, grasp it. If they say it's true, it probably isn't. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 54939849 Canada 02/14/2016 08:10 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 68474440 United States 02/14/2016 08:13 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I know I will probably get a lot of negative comments, but hopefully there's someone out there who can give me good advice to help me get through this really hard time in my life. Quoting: Quetzal785 Why does it feel like my world is coming to an end? Can someone help heal this pain? Because the world as you know it, is coming to an end. Only advice I can muster, is fill your time with friends. See the divorce through and then get back into the dating scene. |
M1.618 User ID: 30281806 Canada 02/14/2016 08:15 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
BTDT User ID: 71326546 United States 02/14/2016 08:27 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I know I will probably get a lot of negative comments, but hopefully there's someone out there who can give me good advice to help me get through this really hard time in my life. Quoting: Quetzal785 Why does it feel like my world is coming to an end? Can someone help heal this pain? Your world is coming to an end. The sooner you grasp that, the better it will be for you going forward. You have been living a life built around a primary relationship, encircled by other people who relate to you in that particular role. You will likely lose a lot of those friends, simply because they are unsure how to relate to you when you aren't a part of the "they" they have known. I know this sounds shallow, but try not to take it personally when your friends hide in the shadows. You will find that, if they are true friends to you, they'll come around in time. Remember--this also means that part of their world is also coming to an end, and they have to deal with that at their pace, too. This is a good time to constantly remind yourself that you cannot change other people, but you can change yourself. Whom do you want to be when you "grow up" now? You're about to start growing in a new direction. Please, please don't resort to mind-numbing and endless entertainment. Now is the time to get to know yourself as yourself, so please don't be afraid to do that! All my best to you. It took me 5 years before I was ready to remarry, and it has been great now for 20 years. Take as much time as you need, and don't make getting into another relationship your priority--getting to know yourself should be your first priority, and everything else falls into place after that. If you have a good friend who has known you for a long time, who can also bear listening to your struggles, take advantage of those opportunities as well--they help with the business of knowing yourself. You're worth the work, and the pain is like all pains--it will heal over time. Just know that it isn't unbearable, even though it might seem that way right now! |
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digitalmonkey User ID: 70514383 United States 02/14/2016 08:39 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | i am guessing you didn't want the divorce. it can be tough because everything changes. learning for everything not to be a reminder of what was. make new memories. stay busy. don't get into a new relationship for a while. take care of yourself. the right person for you will come into your life and this pain will fade over time. if your a christian, get into a church. exercise. different music. different routine. etc. find people to talk to. there are plenty of places online to find people like yourself. I awoke to hear john 3:16 in a loud voice. For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. |
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Quetzal785 (OP) User ID: 70633250 United States 02/14/2016 09:46 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I know I will probably get a lot of negative comments, but hopefully there's someone out there who can give me good advice to help me get through this really hard time in my life. Quoting: Quetzal785 Why does it feel like my world is coming to an end? Can someone help heal this pain? Your world is coming to an end. The sooner you grasp that, the better it will be for you going forward. You have been living a life built around a primary relationship, encircled by other people who relate to you in that particular role. You will likely lose a lot of those friends, simply because they are unsure how to relate to you when you aren't a part of the "they" they have known. I know this sounds shallow, but try not to take it personally when your friends hide in the shadows. You will find that, if they are true friends to you, they'll come around in time. Remember--this also means that part of their world is also coming to an end, and they have to deal with that at their pace, too. This is a good time to constantly remind yourself that you cannot change other people, but you can change yourself. Whom do you want to be when you "grow up" now? You're about to start growing in a new direction. Please, please don't resort to mind-numbing and endless entertainment. Now is the time to get to know yourself as yourself, so please don't be afraid to do that! All my best to you. It took me 5 years before I was ready to remarry, and it has been great now for 20 years. Take as much time as you need, and don't make getting into another relationship your priority--getting to know yourself should be your first priority, and everything else falls into place after that. If you have a good friend who has known you for a long time, who can also bear listening to your struggles, take advantage of those opportunities as well--they help with the business of knowing yourself. You're worth the work, and the pain is like all pains--it will heal over time. Just know that it isn't unbearable, even though it might seem that way right now! thanks! Quetzal785 |