Tired of living with my parents

OP is earning his keep. he is not a kid.

It is better to wait for the right person, than marry the wrong one.

In the mean time, why sit in a flat lonely by yourself, if you can share a place with people you like. It's economical, it's social, it's common sense.

A culture that expects Man as Island is stupid, in my opinion.

Especially in an off-grid scenario... people help each other in a household.

But if OP can't get along with family, then mbe it is time to move on.

/opinion

I'm 33 and live with my father but don't mind it because my father is a great guy and I help him out on a regular basis. Plus he is not in the greatest health so he needs the help. I take care of his house, clean up his yard, perform maintenance on his vehicles, keep his internet and computer functioning like they should etc. A few years back I rebuilt his deck and saved him about $10K on labor. Tomorrow I plan on replacing the brakes and rotors on his vehicle. The work is almost continuous around here but I don't mind it really. "Got to keep up with the up keep", as my father says.

Ding, ding, ding......we have a winner! Instead of a whiner.

If my adult child lived with me I'd expect no less. When I was in my 20's I lived with my Aunt. I paid rent, made dinner every night, did the shopping and cleaned the house on my days off. You've got to give, to get.

Its pretty normal to want to leave.

He should be out in the world with other young people, geowing his own mind, not stagnating at home.

No. I was at home when I was 29, with a small child. I didnt pay rent but I took over housekeeping and cooking. It was nice in many ways, to live in a nicer house than we could have afforded had I married, in a good school district, and to be able to be a full time mother. But it was really hard on me. I feel i traded my life for my sons life. I love him so much i would do it again, but i woukd nwver advise anyone else to live at home. You go to college or join the service and you dont come back. It is very, very hard, to grow up living at home. You can do it, but you become the parents of your parents. It is as difficult as being a child forever.

I will say that MOST people, even WITH jobs can't afford rent.

I know here in the DC metro area, 1 bedroom apartments START at $1200-1400 a month. And that's for apartments in the HOOD, if you want an apartment without hearing gunshots or being overran by 10 amigos in a 2 bedroom apartment as your neighbor, try more like $1600/month. (don't believe me- look it up on apartments.com look at "fairfax, va" and points around there!)

To qualify, one must make $1200x 3 times monthly rent= $43,200 a year in salary.

$20.71 an hour needed to QUALIFY. They won't even look at your application if you make less than that!

Even heading out farther, like Woodbridge, VA and stafford county and as far south as fredericksburg- same thing! Plus you need a CAR to get out that far as there is little to no public transportation. This adds to your costs in time spent getting back to and forth, miles and gas for your car, etc...

How can one get said apartment with an $8-10 per hour PART TIME job?? Even working 2 of them is not enough...

The illegals took all the "regular" jobs one can get without a degree- then Obamacare made it so all the companies are no longer hiring for full-time work (can barely get 30 hours a week if you're lucky because they don't want to pay insurance)...also the illegals overran the cheaper starter apartments- and of course they are "full" or "not available" when you go to speak with the MINORITY leasing agent- but she has some for her illegal amigos! They will stuff 10 in an apartment and management will look the other way because they will pay that rent because they live in fear of being deported! The illegals can't go move into the nicer neighborhoods with corporate leasing offices- but the average american can't afford it with a regular job!

Roommates may work for SOME people, but if you take a peek at craigslist- most are advertising for FEMALE roommates or COUPLES, not single males.



Not making an excuse- just laying out some FACTS here.

So leave DC metro. Go into the military or look around for where else you can work where there is affordable housing.

I'm from the same area and have been here most my life. Very few young people are able to step from their parents home, straight into their own homes.

I had to rent several rooms, basements, closets until I could afford my own place.

It can be done, you just have to make sacrifices to get there.

Craigslist is not the only answer, and no, you're wrong about everyone wanting female roommates.

I have a home that I rent the basement out. I'm female, and never had a female rent from me.

There are many ways to find your path.

Ditto. Man's gotta get out and make his own way in this world.

America doesnt hardly recruit anymore. Lots of youth have nothing to do except post Bernie Sanders memes on facebook

Fast forward 20 years, you become your dad

How do you know about your dad's personal life? Did he take you with him gambling and to see hookers?

Or

Did you have to endure constantly hearing your parents fighting over a hooker and gambling habit as a kid?

Or

Did your dad tell you his secrets so you wouldn't do the same as he had?

And what's with the not giving you proper nutrition as a kid?

Were you a sickly child because of it?

Were you allowed to eat what ever you wanted and selected the sugary junk food all the time over the fruit?

Was it because there was never any food in the house?

Was it because no one cooked and you ate spaghettios and tv dinners all your life as a kid?

Were you an overweight kid or underweight because of it?

As an adult now do you ensure proper nutrition for yourself?

Do you pay for sex as an adult now?

Do you gamble as an adult now?

A few times? All the time?

If you've only engaged a few times in the above mentioned do you think that makes your behavior not as bad as your dad's behavior?

If you've engaged in any or all mentioned above do you use your dad's past behavior in doing the same things to justify why you engage in it too? If so do you think it doesn't make you as bad as he acted?

Have you ever considered your dad did what he did because his dad did it too?

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What this all sounds like is a full grown man guilt tripping his father in order to stay in his house so he can spend money from his job at the warehouse on gambling and hookers. Dad is now getting up there in age and doesn't have sex or gamble anymore and he's using his past against him when dad tries to tell him to not make the same mistakes as he did. He is upset his dad has no retirement because that means he'll have to be the one to take care of him when he gets too frail to generate an income or suffers an injury and can't work. Which the son would likely do because he wants the house and what ever else he's willed when dad passes. If the son isn't ensuring his own proper nutrition now as an adult and eats crappy by choice, bed ridden dad will be eating crappy to, but then again dad probably has always ate crappy and is eating crappy now. Son may eat well as an adult but withold the right nutrition from his dad as a form of revenge. Dad is also friendly towards his son but son does not accept the friendliness. Son says dad never cared about him as a kid but doesn't disclose whether as a child he hoped that one day he would. If as a child he wished his dad cared about him more and that wish came true, then the son is rejecting the blessing. Dad may have always cared about him but is now able to express it better being so old. Dad is talking to other people because his son won't talk to him and he's telling them he doesn't want his son to be a failure like he is.

Forgive your dad. Take his advice. Accept his friendship. Be glad you have him and he lets you live with him. Endure feeling annoyed as he won't be around forever and you will miss him tremendously when he does pass away.