a la Cheech "Chet" Marin

All right! Plasma, plasma, plasma, come on in plasma lovers!
Here at the TV Twister we're slashing plasma in half!
Give us an offer on our best selection of plasma!
This is a plasma blowup!
All right, we got white plasma, black plasma, Spanish plasma,
yellow plasma, we got hot plasma, cold plasma, we got wet plasma,
we got [sniff] smelly plasma, we got hairy plasma, bloody plasma,
we got snapping plasma, we got silk plasma, velvet plasma,
Naugahyde plasma, we even got horse plasma, dog plasma, chicken plasma.
Come on you want plasma, come on in plasma lovers!
If we don't got it you don't want it! COME ON IN PLASMA LOVERS!