sometimes it's just knowing that nothing that was done ever really made a difference..

and many vets just feel that everyone wants them to shut up and go away and not talk about or show their pain.


it's how I feel.

except since I'm female, it's worse cus it's then labeled "self pity".

only male vets that were 'combat decorated' seem to deserve even that much. to be as messed up as they are.

maybe his family just thought he needed 'tough love'..or 'professional help' or to 'take his meds'???

who knows. Maybe they made the mistake he did. The mistake I made. The mistake of trusting the promises they were made and trusting the system itself.

and the system is fucking evil to the core, I will say that.

but the people defending it or relying on it..

they are the problem too. because they don't see that by stepping back and allowing it to continue they are part of it too.

me, I'm just getting sick of it all, but won't do anything that would get me NEAR a VA or a cop.

there are other ways.