interesting that you bring this up, just last night I was telling a friend about some really weird stuff that happened when I was a teenager and how I was connecting the dots between various topics in the lunatic fringe...and how they seem VERY related.

To answer your question, during my young ages I don't recall any real abuse although our neighbor was a perv who set up his garage all cool and encouraged us girls to play house in there and use the video camera and although at the time I was worried about the grownups finding out... I think he knew and I dont know about the others... I was a really young kid, before gradeschool.. having orgasms and practicing sexual stuff for fun and that camera was always there... I dont know if he was making porno or what...but I was only traumatized by my mother shaming me about sexual stuff when she caught me trying to get my cousins to do stuff like that.

Flash forward to when I was a teenager, and I was living at an adult halfway house, and coincidentally there were a lot of women from very well off families there for one reason or another... women whose parents were either in politics or in the entertainment industry, back then George Bush Sr was the vice president and I still recall one of the only other women who was under 18 was his niece. I didnt know anything about anything back then, and I just wondered why you would brag about something like that because he seemed like such a huge dork to me.

Anyhow, while at this place one of the therapies was three hours of group every day where you basically were humilated and exposed by your councillor and then picked apart by your peers, or sometimes you were given praise... seemed random... we also had one on one sessions for 1 -3 hours whenever your councillor wanted, usually at least three times a week.

We all had similar experiences I think, but my experience was this:
I was fifteen, and this therapist/shrink was very interested in my dreams(i was a chronic nightmare person, still am) ... she was always interpreting them, and somehow she was sure that I was involved in satanic rituals but had repressed memories. during this time I actually began to have dreams of that nature, although before that my nightmares were very different. I dream about eating people and human meat packed neatly in the freezer and weird crap like that. She eventually diagnosed me with MPD, along with other things.

Now, while there, in the woods and farm country, at night occasionally there would be lines of torches off in the field heading toward the wood... like 30-40 people carrying the torches there. I have no idea why, but bored as we were at times, we would peek thru the blinds if we noticed and wonder about it, invent reasons... naturally with a councillor suggesting we were in satanic rituals, a number of us were convinved it was something satanic.

During this time I also experienced what I now think was some kind of either hallucination, lucid dream, or out of body experience...but I came up and could see all places around me at once, and noticed that I was laying down on the bed, and I was like above it somehow... as I was noticing this, I saw a hand reach out of the darkness and actually reach INTO me, into my heart area...well into my body's heart area, and I Noticed my body begin to move about and then I found myself rushed back toward my body and then next i knew i was looking out of my eyes again and seemed to be catching my breath. IDK if that was brain washing, or if it really happened... it never happened again. But one of my friends was convinced that aliens were coming and wound up getting sent to the psycheward over it, but the night in question I couldnt sleep and I heard a noise that I thought sounded the way a UFO would...it wasnt even a noise, more like something i could feel the sound of if that makes sense.

gosh I could go on...

So, nine months of therapy for me and for all of these other rich girls from either the east coast or west coast, me i was from the midwest and the facility was in the midwest.

oh i should mention i had my turn at the psycheward, and while there they wanted to do shock therapy on me... my mom eventually intervened and I was spared that ...but only allowed to leave when I started seeing a psychiatrist out side of the facility who attempted to hypnotize me five times (to reveal these socalled repressed memories), but he gave up then and actually treated me like a human being then, and he told me that some people are easily suggestable, and some are not...and he seemed to definately feel it was better to be of the 'not' group.

As an adult I was in and out of therapy and whatnot, and at some point was rediagnosed with what you are talking about dissocitive disorder and all kinds of other crap that I dont really think applies... I believe that I see and experience things that others dont because I am slightly in a different reality.

I hope this answers some of your questions, I have not had any sleep yet today so my thoughts are slightly punctuated with me dozing off. Sorry! If you have any questions feel free to ask, I have no qualms. It is such a weird coincidence that I havent thought about or talked about this stuff for years and JUST LAST NIGHT i was... and i dont really believe in coincidences, so there you go.

Have a good day, good luck with your research.
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