George Noory

George shops at Dildos R Us.

George shops at Dildos R Us. lol hahaha

Might be an okay show tonight.

Art flew Polaris Business Class on United transAtlantic and rang the flight attendant call button to ask her, “WHERE’S THE BEEF?!”

Howhard Bloomers

Jorch's application CV for the Coast To Coast gig lists his most recent employment as Manhole Inspector, and his hobbies as proctology and chewing the chocolate dot.

The guest just said, “George, I’m impressed with your knowledge and acumen.”

Hahahahahahahahaha!! So the guest is a stand-up comic?

George just went down on a Nathan’s hotdog.

Art tries to order Beef Wellington in bearnaise sauce with a glass of 1987 Napa Valley Merlot. On Greyhound.

Instead, he’s forced to eat a veiny corn dog slowly turning under a heat lamp at a Quik Trip outside Tulsa.

Jorch was a fluffer for Siegfried & Roy....

Jorch just checked into the Chateau Marmont under the name Mr. Blowjingles....

Excerpt from Jorch's interview with Hillary Clinton;

Jorch: " And what part of Lesbia are you from?"

Hillary (to assistant): "Add him to the suicide list...."

I was buttfucking Dave Wilcock backstage at the Conscious Life Expo conference a few years ago in David's dressing room. Jorch walked in without knocking. He got turned on and piat off at the same time. He thought he was in an exclusive relationship with David at the time. As I was pumping David coming to climax, Jorch was like a deer in headlights. I saw he was aroused and started getting a boner. Then he snapped out of it and yelled at Dsvid "YOU HOMERECKING PIECE OF SHIT", and stormed out of there.

For some reason it was hot as fuck. David and I came at then same time a few seconds after Jorch spammed the door.

Hoaxland says the reason we haven’t been (back) to the moon is because it’s made of Limburger cheese and we’ve been letting it ferment to perfection. NASA has hired cheese gourmands who say that the moon has reached peak fermentation and now is the time to travel (back) there and cut a slice.

I’d hate to be in that lunar module on its return to earth. Put a clothespin on your nose.

Monday’s guest: Astronomer William Stickuptheahnoose

George Noory would have to be twice as smart to be a half wit.

They're trying to put a lid on it.

Which was the first Voyager craft to launch?

For some reason I am thinking 2 . I am not going to look it up. see if I am right.

Jorch walking by Tommy in the office gets a puzzled look on his face

"What are you doing "

Tommy : " I'm soaking my testicles in Vinegar"

Noorch "For the love of all that is good why!?"

Tommy "Because you told me to "


Noorch " I TOLD YOU TOO !?!?!?!"


Tommy " Yes you said to Pickle my Balls"


Noorch " I said tonight we go PLAY PICKLE BALL YOU FERRET!!!!!!!"