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If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?

 
BunBun
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08/03/2016 03:17 PM
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If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
I'm curious.

I have no sex drive. I have no interest in sex or sexuality. I have been married twice to the same man and have two sons who are 19 and 21 years old.

When I was a young woman, I thought that romance and working together to create a better life for yourself and your children were the points to marriage. My husband and the other men I dated while we were divorced didn't seem to be able to see very far down the road. They tended to live for the here and now.

I did fornicate when I was younger outside of marriage.

Now, I am 42 and I have no sex drive. I have been disavowed of my romantic notions and I think that if I can survive long enough to reach 65 or 70, I will be extremely ready to die. I have been where I wanted to go home to live with Heavenly Father and Lord Jesus and Lord Holy Spirit now because of things that were going on that were beyond my control and were very grievous and scary to me.

I have no hunger for sex, no desire to have sex and no desire to be intimate with another person any longer. I do desire companionship still and I have that with my husband, but I think that a woman entering a relationship with a man expecting him to work with her to create a positive future for them both is most likely deceiving herself.

If your sex drive left you and you were no longer fueled by any kind of horniness, what would change about your thinking and your feeling about the world around you. I think that women are very lucky and that a lot of us do lose our sex drive a lot as we age. Then, we get this chance to see the world without the edge of desperation that comes with the sex drive. It's very liberating.

Men don't seem to be able to think these thoughts. They have their ego and their sexuality linked in a way that makes these kinds of thoughts scary to them and threatening to them. I think that's a mistake. It prevents you from being able to step into old age and be an elder. It keeps you trapped in some behaviors that do damage to both yourself and others and men don't seem to be intelligent enough to stop doing it.

How would you be changed if you stopped being driven by horniness?
Christard and Lover of God
pool
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08/03/2016 03:19 PM

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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
Well, I've changed because of my partner's inability to think about sex. I hate every fucking thing about life. hf
There is always a cure for what ales mankind when she awakens.
Anonymous Coward
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08/03/2016 03:19 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
Show us your tits
bwj2012
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08/03/2016 03:21 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
They have different pills/supplements you can take to get your sex drive back. Its nice for your sex drive to decrease a little but I wouldnt want to lose it completely, just have of control it.
Sexual Energy deepens 1986
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08/03/2016 03:23 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
Sometimes I feel I can change the world (or atleast being a apart) with my own thinking
Anonymous Coward
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08/03/2016 03:23 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
They have different pills/supplements you can take to get your sex drive back. Its nice for your sex drive to decrease a little but I wouldnt want to lose it completely, just have of control it.
 Quoting: bwj2012 67506689


Speak for yourself.

I'd rather not have a sex drive at all.
BunBun  (OP)

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08/03/2016 03:27 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
Show us your tits
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 61359808


I have very nice tits. They were made to breastfeed my children. I only got to have 2 children. I wanted to have more, but I married a man who couldn't provide for our family.

My tits are private and they are not sexual organs. I also have no ovaries or uterus or cervix. I had a total hysterectomy. I have a vagina that is sewn shut at approxiamately 6 inches. It's very strange to have a sewn shut vaginal sleeve. I can literally feel my intestines thought the wall of the vagina and there is no longer a supporting structure there. It's not always a pleasant thing.

Women go through things that men do not have to go through. At 11 to 14 years of age, we begin menstruating and we learn that it's yucky and unpleasant and we have no choice. We can't go under it, we can't go over it or around it. We have to go through it. I think it's one reason why women mature faster than boys.

But, we also get to lose our sex drive as we get older and we get a perspective on being an old woman. That is a grand thing and is no less grand than being a little girl with no sex drive. I feel like I am in my second childhood. I can be both a 42 year-old woman and the little girl that I once was all at the same time. It's wonderful.

My sexuality is not entwined with my ego, so I have suffered no loss in losing the sexuality. I am as I once was. Now, I am preparing for grandchildren and helping my sons finish growing up. I am fighting battles around me and still learning. Life hasn't even come close to ending with the loss of sexuality.

I think men are afraid of that happening to them. But, it has happened to me and it's a good thing. I look at handsome young men and I think that they are some woman's son. They are all kids to me. I look at older people still trying desperately to live sexual lives and I pity them because they are trying to deny the fact that time has moved on. We have to move on with time. Fighting it is foolish.
Christard and Lover of God
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08/03/2016 03:28 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
I'm a guy who was extremely active from 17 to 40. Then it all stopped. I am like you. The thought of being with someone makes me feel queezy. The reason is that I trusted a guy 100% to have unprotected sex but it turned out he was being unsafe with someone with HIV. For 6 years now I have avoided physical contact with anyone.

If anything my life is less coloured but simpler, if that makes sense. I just go from day to day hoping someone special will show who will show me how to see things in a new way. Until then I have to admit I am lonely but it's just something that is, like a cold.

Some of us are meant to be on our own. Even my sons don't want to know me, even though we've never met as the mother kept their existence from me. I have triplet sons but they ignore my attempts to contact them.

So, obviously I'm not meant to know lifelong relationships. God has another plan for me, though he has yet to tell me what it is.

Hey ho. Such is life.

Xx
ar-15 nut

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08/03/2016 03:29 PM

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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
Meh I can take it or leave it but only with a person I'm in a relationship with.its to personal to me.

Last Edited by the deplorable ar-15 nut on 08/03/2016 03:32 PM
A pissed off American veteran.
BunBun  (OP)

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08/03/2016 03:31 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
They have different pills/supplements you can take to get your sex drive back. Its nice for your sex drive to decrease a little but I wouldnt want to lose it completely, just have of control it.
 Quoting: bwj2012 67506689


I like that it's gone. I don't want it back. I lost it through soul sucking pain and grief. Once you go through that, you don't want to have anything to do with it ever again.

I am perfectly happy without it. I still have sex occasionally with my husband. I know that he is still riding the waves, but I hope that he will join me soon. He's 44. We are really running out of time at this point. He wanted that business and played business owner for 6 and 1/2 years on the largesse of his father. Now, we are really behind and with no retirement and no savings, we are in trouble. It's going to take a lot of hurrying to catch up. I'm not sure we are going to be able to make it. It may already be too late. That means we won't be able to retire. I am buying supplements to try to help us with some of the affects of aging, but a lot of it is still going to hit us square in the face over the next 10 years. BunBun is prepared, but my husband is in denial. He will have to get over it. Our day is done and we fucked up.
Christard and Lover of God
BunBun  (OP)

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08/03/2016 03:37 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
I'm a guy who was extremely active from 17 to 40. Then it all stopped. I am like you. The thought of being with someone makes me feel queezy. The reason is that I trusted a guy 100% to have unprotected sex but it turned out he was being unsafe with someone with HIV. For 6 years now I have avoided physical contact with anyone.

If anything my life is less coloured but simpler, if that makes sense. I just go from day to day hoping someone special will show who will show me how to see things in a new way. Until then I have to admit I am lonely but it's just something that is, like a cold.

Some of us are meant to be on our own. Even my sons don't want to know me, even though we've never met as the mother kept their existence from me. I have triplet sons but they ignore my attempts to contact them.

So, obviously I'm not meant to know lifelong relationships. God has another plan for me, though he has yet to tell me what it is.

Hey ho. Such is life.

Xx
 Quoting: 135 418 72667409


I hope you find companionship. It can certainly happen. There are other people like us out there. You can lose your sex drive because of a really upsetting or unhappy thing happening to you. That's how I lost mine.

There are more of us than people want you to think. Don't give up. Keep trying to find companionship, dear. It's not always easy, but I think we have a better time than they do getting through the days of life. Less desperation, really and we can focus on the things we want to do instead of being driven to play the man/woman sex game. It's so tedious. I can see the 20 somethings being engaged in it because they are having their children, but for those of us who have had our children and they are grown, there is no more reason to keep it up. It's time to move on to the next stage of life. We will get to be elders. You will too. your a father, dear, even if the children don't know you. Don't give up. Your children will go through changes in life too. Keep your chin up.

Old age should be a great time of life where you know things and are good at things and can lead the younger people. We don't have to be irrelevant. We can be both young and old at the same time.
Christard and Lover of God
BunBun  (OP)

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08/03/2016 03:44 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
I think people are afraid of having this happen to them.

Men are afraid that it will happen to their wives and girlfriends. It does happen to women. It happens all the time.

People act like it's a dysfunction. But, when I was a little girl, I wasn't sexual. Being a little girl is the most free thing that anyone can be. No real need for competitiveness and you get to focus on fun and cute and the world around you.

When sexuality starts to come in, the situation changes for girls. I think it's not necessarily a positive for them. They start to seek males and what males want instead of what they think about things. Women will downplay their own wants and needs and focus on those of the male. Somewhere along the way, we get lost and often, the males want to pay us for ourselves in sex and sexuality-which is very selfish on their part because that isn't what women want at all.

Women want companionship and fun and time spent together doing meaningful things. Women want to be the little girls they once were and not the sexual women that they were told they were supposed to become. Sex messes everything up. Little girls will lose themselves and not come back for 25 years. Its a negative for women in the long run. It's part of the curse that women desire would be for their husband, but we can step out of it. I have done it. It is entirely possible.
Christard and Lover of God
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08/03/2016 03:46 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
I'm a guy who was extremely active from 17 to 40. Then it all stopped. I am like you. The thought of being with someone makes me feel queezy. The reason is that I trusted a guy 100% to have unprotected sex but it turned out he was being unsafe with someone with HIV. For 6 years now I have avoided physical contact with anyone.

If anything my life is less coloured but simpler, if that makes sense. I just go from day to day hoping someone special will show who will show me how to see things in a new way. Until then I have to admit I am lonely but it's just something that is, like a cold.

Some of us are meant to be on our own. Even my sons don't want to know me, even though we've never met as the mother kept their existence from me. I have triplet sons but they ignore my attempts to contact them.

So, obviously I'm not meant to know lifelong relationships. God has another plan for me, though he has yet to tell me what it is.

Hey ho. Such is life.

Xx
 Quoting: 135 418 72667409


I hope you find companionship. It can certainly happen. There are other people like us out there. You can lose your sex drive because of a really upsetting or unhappy thing happening to you. That's how I lost mine.

There are more of us than people want you to think. Don't give up. Keep trying to find companionship, dear. It's not always easy, but I think we have a better time than they do getting through the days of life. Less desperation, really and we can focus on the things we want to do instead of being driven to play the man/woman sex game. It's so tedious. I can see the 20 somethings being engaged in it because they are having their children, but for those of us who have had our children and they are grown, there is no more reason to keep it up. It's time to move on to the next stage of life. We will get to be elders. You will too. your a father, dear, even if the children don't know you. Don't give up. Your children will go through changes in life too. Keep your chin up.

Old age should be a great time of life where you know things and are good at things and can lead the younger people. We don't have to be irrelevant. We can be both young and old at the same time.
 Quoting: BunBun


Thank you for your kind words. I am 46 going on 22. I don't see myself as old. I look like a 35 year old and always will. I have the V chromosome. I will live another 2150 years for my sins. I'm sure I will find someone in that time, but it will be short lived.

Life is always full of surprises, eh?
Anonymous Coward
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08/03/2016 03:49 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
I'm over 60.

I'm a guy and I have lost my "sex drive."

I still think women are hot, though.

Especially young ones, nomesane?

Pert tits an' asses!
Anonymous Coward
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08/03/2016 03:50 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
One star.. sorry but this is retarded thinking.

Get some medical help please
Anonymous Coward
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08/03/2016 03:51 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill talks about the power of transmutation. I.e channeling sexual energy towards other endeavors.
BodilessModerator
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08/03/2016 03:53 PM

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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
UMMMMMMMMMM

:owlwtf:
Anonymous Coward
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08/03/2016 03:55 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
you talk about Jesus, assuming you are a christian, is your husband a christian?
Bible-Tard
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08/03/2016 03:57 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
They have different pills/supplements you can take to get your sex drive back. Its nice for your sex drive to decrease a little but I wouldnt want to lose it completely, just have of control it.
 Quoting: bwj2012 67506689


I like that it's gone. I don't want it back. I lost it through soul sucking pain and grief. Once you go through that, you don't want to have anything to do with it ever again.

I am perfectly happy without it. I still have sex occasionally with my husband. I know that he is still riding the waves, but I hope that he will join me soon. He's 44. We are really running out of time at this point. He wanted that business and played business owner for 6 and 1/2 years on the largesse of his father. Now, we are really behind and with no retirement and no savings, we are in trouble. It's going to take a lot of hurrying to catch up. I'm not sure we are going to be able to make it. It may already be too late. That means we won't be able to retire. I am buying supplements to try to help us with some of the affects of aging, but a lot of it is still going to hit us square in the face over the next 10 years. BunBun is prepared, but my husband is in denial. He will have to get over it. Our day is done and we fucked up.
 Quoting: BunBun


Don't worry about money BunBun, Jesus provides for his sheep.
pool
~ Tomorrow & tomorrow creeps ~

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08/03/2016 04:01 PM

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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
I am buying supplements to try to help us with some of the affects of aging,
 Quoting: BunBun


Don't worry about money BunBun, Jesus provides for his sheep.
 Quoting: Bible-Tard 35736055


Supplements are not for everyone.
There is always a cure for what ales mankind when she awakens.
Piltwort

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08/03/2016 04:03 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
That would suck to lose sex drive. I'm your age, and haven't really had much sexual experience. I would still like to have some sex before it falls away. I have everything else; sex is the one thing I desire most in life right now, and I believe if I could achieve it in a good relationship, it would be twice a day for a long time.
Piltwort
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08/03/2016 04:03 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
Show us your tits
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 61359808


I have very nice tits. They were made to breastfeed my children. I only got to have 2 children. I wanted to have more, but I married a man who couldn't provide for our family.

My tits are private and they are not sexual organs. I also have no ovaries or uterus or cervix. I had a total hysterectomy. I have a vagina that is sewn shut at approxiamately 6 inches. It's very strange to have a sewn shut vaginal sleeve. I can literally feel my intestines thought the wall of the vagina and there is no longer a supporting structure there. It's not always a pleasant thing.

Women go through things that men do not have to go through. At 11 to 14 years of age, we begin menstruating and we learn that it's yucky and unpleasant and we have no choice. We can't go under it, we can't go over it or around it. We have to go through it. I think it's one reason why women mature faster than boys.

But, we also get to lose our sex drive as we get older and we get a perspective on being an old woman. That is a grand thing and is no less grand than being a little girl with no sex drive. I feel like I am in my second childhood. I can be both a 42 year-old woman and the little girl that I once was all at the same time. It's wonderful.

My sexuality is not entwined with my ego, so I have suffered no loss in losing the sexuality. I am as I once was. Now, I am preparing for grandchildren and helping my sons finish growing up. I am fighting battles around me and still learning. Life hasn't even come close to ending with the loss of sexuality.

I think men are afraid of that happening to them. But, it has happened to me and it's a good thing. I look at handsome young men and I think that they are some woman's son. They are all kids to me. I look at older people still trying desperately to live sexual lives and I pity them because they are trying to deny the fact that time has moved on. We have to move on with time. Fighting it is foolish.
 Quoting: BunBun


I do agree with you BUT not at 42, your poor husband.
BunBun  (OP)

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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
One star.. sorry but this is retarded thinking.

Get some medical help please
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 69414744


It's not retarded. I don't need medical help. There are a lot of positives to losing your sex drive.

People have no idea what it's like not to be driven by a desire to fuck. They are held captive by this thing. If you ever escape it and your ego is not so bound up in it that you are destroyed-as clearly yours is because you are afraid of going through it and see it as a dysfunction to be dealt with by all that the medical community can throw at it which is ridiculous-then, you will see with different eyes.

When I was a young woman and had a sex drive, I read romance novels. I wouldn't masterbate to them, I would get sexual arousal. Lots of women are doing that. Endorphins and oxytocin are released with sexual arousal and you feel good and hum through the rest of your day, but deep inside, you feel dirty because you are addicted to female porn, essentially. When I was 24 years old, my children were 3 and 9 months old and I desperately wanted not to be addicted to female porn anymore, but the hold that it had over me was so strong. I wouldn't be able to walk away from it until my father's death in 2007. Then, I put it down never to have another fantasy again. All the thrusting and fucking and sucking and you name it-gone. It's over.

I don't ever want to be in thrall to those things ever again. I see women buying romance novels now. I know exactly what they are going to get. But, I escaped. I escaped sexuality and sexual addiction and I escaped from sexual desire and I don't feel those driving forces anymore. They have no hold on me. I can be me in my body and not care whether anyone on planet earth or elsewhere thinks I am attractive or sexy. It literally doesn't matter. I am moving on to be a grandmother now. I can't wait for the grandbabies to start showing up. That is going to be my second glory. Holding an innocent one in my arms again and feeding them and nurturing them. Dear Lord, don't let it be stripped from me. I pray for them to be healthy and well both mentally and physically. I pray for my children to be well and healthy and capable of being excellent parents and productive adults. That is where I am now.

My father-in-law is a porn addict. He pays 200 to get cialis so he can get a hard on to masturbate to internet porn. I pity him. His ego won't let him let go of the addiction he's had for so long. His grandchildren have known from a young age not to go on grandpa's computer because of the porn on it. I really hope that my grandchildren don't have to know about that part of great-grandpa's life.

We have a need to grow older and to deal with the changing nature of our lives and our bodies. It's okay to be an older person and to lose your sexuality. It doesn't make you less of a person. There are those who will refuse to give up the sexuality of youth and return to the way that they were before they became sexual beings. BunBun isn't one of them. I look at 2 and 3 year old children and think how lucky they are. I look at 5 to 10 year old children and I know how fortunate they are to sleep in their safe beds everynight with their mothers and fathers nearby and their brothers and sisters right there. Nothing can replace that time. They are presexual. Their lives revolve around play and learning and growth.

So does mine now. Play and learning and growth. It looks a little different than it did when I was a kid, but I am happy. Praise God for his gift. We went through a lot of pain to get here. It isn't easy to shut off your sex drive. But, I think when it happens to someone, we shouldn't view it as a shame or a bad thing. I think it's a gift.
Christard and Lover of God
Daniel of the Rose

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08/03/2016 04:08 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
I'm curious.

I have no sex drive. I have no interest in sex or sexuality. I have been married twice to the same man and have two sons who are 19 and 21 years old.

When I was a young woman, I thought that romance and working together to create a better life for yourself and your children were the points to marriage. My husband and the other men I dated while we were divorced didn't seem to be able to see very far down the road. They tended to live for the here and now.

I did fornicate when I was younger outside of marriage.

Now, I am 42 and I have no sex drive. I have been disavowed of my romantic notions and I think that if I can survive long enough to reach 65 or 70, I will be extremely ready to die. I have been where I wanted to go home to live with Heavenly Father and Lord Jesus and Lord Holy Spirit now because of things that were going on that were beyond my control and were very grievous and scary to me.

I have no hunger for sex, no desire to have sex and no desire to be intimate with another person any longer. I do desire companionship still and I have that with my husband, but I think that a woman entering a relationship with a man expecting him to work with her to create a positive future for them both is most likely deceiving herself.

If your sex drive left you and you were no longer fueled by any kind of horniness, what would change about your thinking and your feeling about the world around you. I think that women are very lucky and that a lot of us do lose our sex drive a lot as we age. Then, we get this chance to see the world without the edge of desperation that comes with the sex drive. It's very liberating.

Men don't seem to be able to think these thoughts. They have their ego and their sexuality linked in a way that makes these kinds of thoughts scary to them and threatening to them. I think that's a mistake. It prevents you from being able to step into old age and be an elder. It keeps you trapped in some behaviors that do damage to both yourself and others and men don't seem to be intelligent enough to stop doing it.

How would you be changed if you stopped being driven by horniness?
 Quoting: BunBun

I think this is some kind of trap....certain things you are pointing out in the beginning of your story seems..
in-genuine

there's this lady on Youtub...that SAYS exactly what you just typed... while having her 4 year old suckle away on Youtube vision....soooo much SCRIPT...


you were only married once....especially if it's the same person ...even if you got separated...or divorce... it's still with the same person...so yeah once...

in this whole post of yours it seemed there was a lot of ego...your I's say's a lot about your mutuality towards your partner...almost seems SELFISH...

but as an adult, they are used to attract also ...why diminish it?
:rainrose:
Anonymous Coward
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
They have different pills/supplements you can take to get your sex drive back. Its nice for your sex drive to decrease a little but I wouldnt want to lose it completely, just have of control it.
 Quoting: bwj2012 67506689


I like that it's gone. I don't want it back. I lost it through soul sucking pain and grief. Once you go through that, you don't want to have anything to do with it ever again.

I am perfectly happy without it. I still have sex occasionally with my husband. I know that he is still riding the waves, but I hope that he will join me soon. He's 44. We are really running out of time at this point. He wanted that business and played business owner for 6 and 1/2 years on the largesse of his father. Now, we are really behind and with no retirement and no savings, we are in trouble. It's going to take a lot of hurrying to catch up. I'm not sure we are going to be able to make it. It may already be too late. That means we won't be able to retire. I am buying supplements to try to help us with some of the affects of aging, but a lot of it is still going to hit us square in the face over the next 10 years. BunBun is prepared, but my husband is in denial. He will have to get over it. Our day is done and we fucked up.
 Quoting: BunBun


Wow BunBun. All this is going on and you're posting about sex drive? What am I missing?
BunBun  (OP)

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08/03/2016 04:11 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
Show us your tits
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 61359808


I have very nice tits. They were made to breastfeed my children. I only got to have 2 children. I wanted to have more, but I married a man who couldn't provide for our family.

My tits are private and they are not sexual organs. I also have no ovaries or uterus or cervix. I had a total hysterectomy. I have a vagina that is sewn shut at approxiamately 6 inches. It's very strange to have a sewn shut vaginal sleeve. I can literally feel my intestines thought the wall of the vagina and there is no longer a supporting structure there. It's not always a pleasant thing.

Women go through things that men do not have to go through. At 11 to 14 years of age, we begin menstruating and we learn that it's yucky and unpleasant and we have no choice. We can't go under it, we can't go over it or around it. We have to go through it. I think it's one reason why women mature faster than boys.

But, we also get to lose our sex drive as we get older and we get a perspective on being an old woman. That is a grand thing and is no less grand than being a little girl with no sex drive. I feel like I am in my second childhood. I can be both a 42 year-old woman and the little girl that I once was all at the same time. It's wonderful.

My sexuality is not entwined with my ego, so I have suffered no loss in losing the sexuality. I am as I once was. Now, I am preparing for grandchildren and helping my sons finish growing up. I am fighting battles around me and still learning. Life hasn't even come close to ending with the loss of sexuality.

I think men are afraid of that happening to them. But, it has happened to me and it's a good thing. I look at handsome young men and I think that they are some woman's son. They are all kids to me. I look at older people still trying desperately to live sexual lives and I pity them because they are trying to deny the fact that time has moved on. We have to move on with time. Fighting it is foolish.
 Quoting: BunBun


I do agree with you BUT not at 42, your poor husband.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 72434238


No, he's not poor. He is the reason why it happened to me. It had to do with things that he was doing. He's not a victim-or at least where it comes to sex, he might be his own victim. But, when your wife is lying in bed screaming and yelling and swearing talking to the Lord each night, I think you have a problem. If you fail to deal with that problem, then you accept the consequences of your behavior.

He avoids problems and refuses to deal with situations that arise for an insanely long time. I survive this. That is what I have done for 24 fucking years, Moldovia. I know you want to feel sorry for him, but don't. He's had every chance in the world to do the right thing and he waited too long. BunBun has seen some shit. Now, I have to survive burying his father and dealing with his house of hoard and I have to take care of my mother and my son. I have to keep everyone as healthy as I can and try to protect the people of my household.

I'm sure the kneejerk reaction of people who don't know any better is, boy, I feel sorry for your husband. But, listen. If you had seen the things that have gone on in this household for the last 10 years, you wouldn't think that. You would think-goddamn that's some stupid bullshit and you wouldn wonder what his IQ was. You would tell me what the therapist that I hired has said. She tells me he has no common sense. I suppose she might be right.
Christard and Lover of God
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08/03/2016 04:12 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
I am with you, Bun Bun! I'm 53, menopausal, and most of my drive is gone.
I am happy to be free from the madness of it all. I was depressed from the day I hit puberty, until menopause ended the hormonal ride. Never again can a man control me!

I like being invisible to men, and being free from the whole game.
Anonymous Coward
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08/03/2016 04:12 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
Seriously, what is wrong with you? Do we need to hear about your sewn up vagina? Too much info, sweetie.

Sorry, 40 year old female here with an awesome sex drive. Sucks to be you.
Anonymous Coward
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08/03/2016 04:13 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
I'm curious.

I have no sex drive. I have no interest in sex or sexuality. I have been married twice to the same man and have two sons who are 19 and 21 years old.

When I was a young woman, I thought that romance and working together to create a better life for yourself and your children were the points to marriage. My husband and the other men I dated while we were divorced didn't seem to be able to see very far down the road. They tended to live for the here and now.

I did fornicate when I was younger outside of marriage.

Now, I am 42 and I have no sex drive. I have been disavowed of my romantic notions and I think that if I can survive long enough to reach 65 or 70, I will be extremely ready to die. I have been where I wanted to go home to live with Heavenly Father and Lord Jesus and Lord Holy Spirit now because of things that were going on that were beyond my control and were very grievous and scary to me.

I have no hunger for sex, no desire to have sex and no desire to be intimate with another person any longer. I do desire companionship still and I have that with my husband, but I think that a woman entering a relationship with a man expecting him to work with her to create a positive future for them both is most likely deceiving herself.

If your sex drive left you and you were no longer fueled by any kind of horniness, what would change about your thinking and your feeling about the world around you. I think that women are very lucky and that a lot of us do lose our sex drive a lot as we age. Then, we get this chance to see the world without the edge of desperation that comes with the sex drive. It's very liberating.

Men don't seem to be able to think these thoughts. They have their ego and their sexuality linked in a way that makes these kinds of thoughts scary to them and threatening to them. I think that's a mistake. It prevents you from being able to step into old age and be an elder. It keeps you trapped in some behaviors that do damage to both yourself and others and men don't seem to be intelligent enough to stop doing it.

How would you be changed if you stopped being driven by horniness?
 Quoting: BunBun


Men can't just lose their sex drive like women (unless they are castrated).... Companionship is great, but when a woman rejects/discounts a mans sexual drive, the man feels REJECTED and unloved... You would be best not being with a man, you should seek out companionship with a woman who has similar interests.
Anonymous Coward
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08/03/2016 04:13 PM
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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
If I lost my sex drive, if have nothing at all to do with women besides the menial day-to-day social interactions/transactions. Aside from sex they serve no purpose in my life anymore. It was a lesson hard learned and I'm not about to forget it.
BodilessModerator
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08/03/2016 04:14 PM

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Re: If you lost your sex drive, would you still think the stupid crap you think with your sex drive intact?
I am with you, Bun Bun! I'm 53, menopausal, and most of my drive is gone.
I am happy to be free from the madness of it all. I was depressed from the day I hit puberty, until menopause ended the hormonal ride. Never again can a man control me!

I like being invisible to men, and being free from the whole game.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 58473955


Ummm--was it the men--or the hormones?





GLP