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I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 73108526
Belgium
10/03/2016 03:00 PM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
life can indeed be cruel.

i hope you and everyone else who has lost something can give it a place.
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 04:44 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
It was five months ago. He was murdered at the age of 61. I've since sold my home and am living in a small rental. Most of my world possessions are in storage. I don't have the heart to sort through them.

My memory is extremely poor. I can tell that I am not right. I've lost 30 pounds and look 20 years older.

I was praying for my husband when he was shot. I loved him so very much and he loved me.

Where was God? How am I to ever pray again? How am I to ever trust God again?

I have a roomate in my home now who helps me get through the days. Without this roomate, I'd be in a psyche ward.

And yes, I'm seeking medical, psychiatric, spiritual help. The drugs just cloud my mind. The doctors says I'm in shock (Acute Stress Disorder) and will soon move into PTSD. The psychiatrist says I'm doing well. The psychologist may be outt of her depth on this one.

Every day of my life, I thanked God for my wonderful husband. I never ever took him for granted. Ever. I loved every thing about him.

Where is God? And how do I face the days?

Please, no flippant answers. I'm in deep pain, in a small rental home filled with boxes. I don't know where I'm going. I can't even think 10 minutes ahead without weeping.
 Quoting: Hope_Full


You we're blessed to be on this earth at this special time in life.

Be thankful for that!

He is watching over you from above and making sure you do good on life.

Whenever it's your time you both will rejoice in Heaven.

Cheer Up!

angel3
Soundman

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06/12/2019 04:55 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
OP, The only thoughts I have is to say you have the right to be having a hard time.
I do know from experience that prayer does work and if you can't pray right now, we will for you.

I also know looking back that God was with me at my darkest times.
He IS with you and he will comfort you OP.

Matthew 5:4 King James Version (KJV)
4 Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.
Soundman
bobdrake

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06/12/2019 04:58 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I'm sorry sweetie. hf
 Quoting: the deplorable ar-15 nut


I am too.
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 05:00 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
So sorry for your loss. We seriously all need to wake the fuck up....we all get what we can carry in life. And I believe that three years from now, you will remember this just as a historical moment in life that passed you by.

Face your self before facing anybody.
Keep all positive people around you for help and support and close of your negative people around you.

The fact that it does something to you and like you said weeping in thinking ahead proves to me that it will be oke eventually. And that you're a strong person.

This roommate is probably you're reason to live right now. Hold on to each other and be patient to one another.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
06/12/2019 05:16 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
hf
Anonymous Coward
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United States
06/12/2019 05:19 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
My dear woman, a broken heart is truly the most painful thing humans go thru. My husband of 41 years died after 8 weeks in hospital of one poor diagnosis after the other. Almost two years later, I cry, tears roll down my face and I do not even realize it. Some things I do to ease the pain of this devastating loss are; I talk to him during the day, it helps me feel close to him. I wear his socks, sleep with his shirts, I collected his (our) pictures from day one of our love story and carry some of them with me where ever I go. I bought a lovely wooden box and put all of his little personal items, papers, service medals, watch, pocket knife, etc. in it. I look through it and smile at him. I pray to God to give him peace and that I will see him again one day. A great love should never die. The loss of a great love will live forever. You are not alone. He is with you.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 72362284


youknow
Anonymous Coward
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New Zealand
06/12/2019 05:41 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
OP My Heart breaks for you but I will be level with you.

God is with you.

The question is are you still with God?

It is normal to question and normal to doubt. But if your husband died in Jesus then he is with God no doubt at all.

Its these moments of chaos, meaningless chaos we can give up on God.

You must stay loyal and faithful. Even though you are devastated learn to give all that pain and hurt to God and Jesus.

God and Jesus will not only take it, but they will also carry you too.

We live in a fallen world.

Our time here is extremely short. Jesus himself said this lifetime is like a vapor compared to life in heaven.

Your husband will not be your husband in heaven. Our parents, kids, partners will not be that in heaven. We are all just one massive family.

Stay faithful OP. Stay Faithful, Stay Faithful.

You need to do nothing but talk to God and Jesus (Yeshua).

Live your faith and trust.

God bless and Shalom. My love also be with you.
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 05:45 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Three years ago ?
Anonymous Coward
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United States
06/12/2019 05:46 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
This is where spiritual work keeps people sane. Not religious, but spiritual. The definition of ‘spiritual’ is how the universe actually functions. Skip the new age garbage and learn how and why what happened to your husband and you. Then you can have closure and move on, which is now your purpose. If you fail at this purpose, you will repeat it.

Your husband is not dead. Only his physical vessel is dead. As someone who has had natural astral projections his entire life i can promise you he is doing just fine. And unless you are a true narcissist, that should give you peace. Do not wallow in self pity.

Before you took possession of the life body you have now, you agreed to and chose this experience for yourself. Your highest consciousness thought you could use some horror and suffering. There are two methods for learning here. Quickly, or slowly. You have taken the slow path but i can help you speed things up.

How quickly has the last 20 years gone by for you? In a blink of an eye, right? If you’re 60, then in another blink of an eye you will be done with this physical life. You will move on and you will see the soul of your husband. Time does not exist. Try to not dwell on earth time, it’s only a tool used in this plane and it will magnify your suffering.

The fast path to moving on is to realize that this entire script of life, this current experience, you wrote for yourself. Knowing you set yourself up for this pain can negate the pain, as long as you understand why you did this to yourself. Analyze your highest purpose and consciousness and change yourself into what it is your highest self wants you to be. It takes some thought and reading. But get busy.

Again, don’t wallow in pity or you will be failing. Stop acting like a victim because in the end, it’s all just acting.

During this process, which should take you a week or two of due diligence, take up walking. Stop starving yourself like a fool. And maybe even start jogging. See the big picture. Not just what you want to see because you feel bad for yourself.

I guarantee your husband monitors your progress and he may be channeling through me right now. Get your ass in gear and handle the mission before you. Your number one goal right now is to recover from this situation like a boss and move on with life. You don’t have much time left.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
06/12/2019 05:54 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
It is natural to question God.
Martha questioned Jesus Christ,
God in the flesh, over the death
of her brother.

It is natural to grieve.
Jesus Wept. (the shortest verse
in the Bible)
Though He could have, He NEVER
shunned any of the griefs that
flesh is heir to, sadness, loss,
betrayal, misery, anguish...

Don't EVER turn your back on Him,
because HE is your ONLY answer.


Keilani

User ID: 76820886
United States
06/12/2019 05:58 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Prayers are what I most need. I seem to have lost the ability to pray for myself or others.

Thank you for the kind words.
 Quoting: Hope_Full


May the LORD bless you and keep you, may the LORD make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you, may the LORD lift up his countenance upon you and give you grace.

A spirit of praise for a spirit of heaviness, I read a book on this about how to praise God through all things good and bad and he will lift your depression and it actually works. I gave book to friend and it worked for her too, can't remember name of it, was an old book, I think it was called From Prison to Praise or something like that.

This is part of Isaiah 61, the whole chapter is good:

To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified.

Maybe talking things out about what happened might help too, helps some people to get it out of their system, then also some people join some kind of movement or passion against the crime that happened to your husband, or any kind of passion your husband had to feel a part of him.

Fear not though, he left you unexpectedly, but you will see him again.
Swissy
User ID: 34487328
Switzerland
06/12/2019 05:59 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
This is the best advice so far of which everyone should follow. Life is only a game. Treat the Earth as your world stage. The husband’s role is now finished and you OP, still has to play your starring role on it. There are still scripts that you must say.

Play it right and always do the right thing - on the world stage until the end and make sure you bow gracefully and thankfully.

🙏 Namaste!

uote:Anonymous Coward 72515242:MV8zMzAzNTUxXzU5MDU5ODI2Xzg0QzcyM0Y3]
Prayers are what I most need. I seem to have lost the ability to pray for myself or others.

Thank you for the kind words.
 Quoting: Hope_Full


Hi, Im not a religious person but more into spirituality.

All I will say is, your husband isn't dead.. He left this reality because whatever he came here to do was done..

Just because you can't see him, doesn't mean he isn't around.

He can be entering your dreams or doing any number of things like playing songs on the radio etc.. There are many subtle signals spirits will do to let you know they are there.. so pay attention to them. even knocks on the door with no one there etc.. Its just their way to say hi, im still around.. The last thing they want is for you to be living in depression.. Negative spirits will thrive on that, and can cause some havoc if you're not careful.

We all live a life that is planned out.. Nothing happens by chance. As a soul you could be meant to experience something else entirely at this point in your life. It could be anything from being independent, to meeting a new partner who will be someone to offer you new lessons and challenges that is meant for your souls growth.

Whatever you are to go through wasn't meant to be with your husband.. It probably could have ended the way it did, or in something much uglier like cheating/divorce.. Either way you were meant to be on your own at this time..

I guarantee you one thing.. You husband doesn't want you living the rest of your days on drugs you don't need, nor living in depression because of what happen.

You have to pull through this tough time and look to new days ahead which can be filled with the same joy and happiness you have already experienced with your late husband..

Our family members who pass on before us actually despise that we live and wallow in the past.. It sometimes can tie/bind them to you too long.. Which stifles them on the other side..

I don't know what else to say, but everything will be ok.. I try not to sugar coat everything but everyone deserves to know the truth.. and most mediums won't touch on anything that might seem negative, which i don't agree with.. Like I said, you could very well be binding your husband to earth by wallowing in his passing this long.. Please be mindful of him and his souls journey.. Take care.. Things will get better.


Prayers are what I most need. I seem to have lost the ability to pray for myself or others.

Thank you for the kind words.
 Quoting: Hope_Full


Hi, Im not a religious person but more into spirituality.

All I will say is, your husband isn't dead.. He left this reality because whatever he came here to do was done..

Just because you can't see him, doesn't mean he isn't around.

He can be entering your dreams or doing any number of things like playing songs on the radio etc.. There are many subtle signals spirits will do to let you know they are there.. so pay attention to them. even knocks on the door with no one there etc.. Its just their way to say hi, im still around.. The last thing they want is for you to be living in depression.. Negative spirits will thrive on that, and can cause some havoc if you're not careful.

We all live a life that is planned out.. Nothing happens by chance. As a soul you could be meant to experience something else entirely at this point in your life. It could be anything from being independent, to meeting a new partner who will be someone to offer you new lessons and challenges that is meant for your souls growth.

Whatever you are to go through wasn't meant to be with your husband.. It probably could have ended the way it did, or in something much uglier like cheating/divorce.. Either way you were meant to be on your own at this time..

I guarantee you one thing.. You husband doesn't want you living the rest of your days on drugs you don't need, nor living in depression because of what happen.

You have to pull through this tough time and look to new days ahead which can be filled with the same joy and happiness you have already experienced with your late husband..

Our family members who pass on before us actually despise that we live and wallow in the past.. It sometimes can tie/bind them to you too long.. Which stifles them on the other side..

I don't know what else to say, but everything will be ok.. I try not to sugar coat everything but everyone deserves to know the truth.. and most mediums won't touch on anything that might seem negative, which i don't agree with.. Like I said, you could very well be binding your husband to earth by wallowing in his passing this long.. Please be mindful of him and his souls journey.. Take care.. Things will get better.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 72515242
Keilani

User ID: 76820886
United States
06/12/2019 05:59 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Prayers are what I most need. I seem to have lost the ability to pray for myself or others.

Thank you for the kind words.
 Quoting: Hope_Full


May the LORD bless you and keep you, may the LORD make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you, may the LORD lift up his countenance upon you and give you PEACE!


 Quoting: Keilani


Sorry messed that up, may HE give you PEACE!!
McSquire

User ID: 76658157
United Kingdom
06/12/2019 06:04 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Bless you. Read some near death experiences these will give you solace. :)
Serepta Ann

User ID: 77703417
United States
06/12/2019 06:09 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I am coming up on the 2 yr mark of my hubs death and THIS SHIT IS INTOLERABLE!

So what is it, did your hubs die 3 yrs ago, last year, did he put a gun in his mouth, did some else shoot him???? So this is your lie today, your posts suggest other stories. From someone who truly lost someone, I say FU and your lies...absolutely disgusting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You have to train your mind to be stronger than your emotions or you will lose yourself every time

Serepta Ann

esse quam videri
szlachta

User ID: 77722332
Poland
06/12/2019 06:09 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I'm sorry for your loss. This is a good time for you to shed the shackles of religion, especially abrahamic nonsense cults. Hang in there.
White Wolf Waking
LOVE, protect, defend

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06/12/2019 06:12 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I'm so sorry for your loss. I am grieving someone myself and I feel your pain. I am praying you find peace, comfort and the strength to go on. hf
ANIMAL FRIEND

"All creatures are created from the same paternal heartbeat of God. Not to hurt our humble brethren is our first duty to them, but to stop there is not enough. We have a higher mission--to be of service to them wherever they require it. If you have men who will exclude any of God's creatures from the shelter of compassion and pity, you will have men who will deal likewise with their fellow men."

-St. Francis of Assisi

"The greatness of a nation and it's moral progress can be judged by the way in which its animals are treated."
-Gandhi

Thread: Top 10 Opera Auditions (My Music Thread)
MissCleo

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06/12/2019 06:12 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
(((( hugs )))))

Love is a beautiful thing!

My PTSD is from being stuck in the flight or fight response, frozen. I didn't allow myself to fully grieve and was stuck in so much pain. It's ok to let go. Give yourself permission.
Keilani

User ID: 76820886
United States
06/12/2019 06:15 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I hope it isn't wrong but the stories of everyone's love has helped me.

I've lost love a couple times. My life is physical pain and loneliness. It's almost unbearable.

Be grateful that you had so many years of the kind of love some of us may never know
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 56711823


No it's not wrong, may the LORD also bless you and keep you and give you peace!
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 06:24 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
murdered by who?

.
Keilani

User ID: 76820886
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06/12/2019 06:24 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Thank you very much for the responses.

I have a roommate in the house to help me survive. It's not ideal, but were it not for that, I'd be in a psyche ward. I've tried all the drugs and they're not for me. The side effects are terrible.

For 10 years, I cooked him dinner every night and tried to make him laugh several times a day. I loved him but I also really, really liked him.

I did volunteer work but now I can hardly find the energy to wash the sheets on my bed. I try to go outside every day and do one thing (deal with attorneys, bill payment, etc.), but I am not doing well.

Thank you especially to the woman who said her husband was murdered. It helps to know I'm not alone.
 Quoting: Hope_Full


This may also sounds crazy, but make sure you're getting all your vitamins, especially if you're not eating due to grieving, your brain needs magnesium, potassium especially for mental well being, B vitamins, fish oil also good for brain and well being, I know cannot take pain/loss away, but can strangely balance your PTSD feelings.
MissCleo

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06/12/2019 06:28 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
murdered by who?

.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77281547


I'm interested too.

And You Got This... you're a strong woman who is capable. Don't give up because of your age and you think that you can't recover. You CAN recover and carry on. There is purpose for you!

Build your support group, use your resources, put the timelines together, be you, get to a place where you feel safe!!!

Would you feel safe moving away?
Would you feel safe in a gated community?
Would you feel safe with less family or friends in your life?
Anonymous Coward
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United States
06/12/2019 06:30 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
How is it that none of you realize you're responding to a 3 year old thread after some idiot bumped it
Anonymous Coward
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United States
06/12/2019 06:30 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
It was five months ago. He was murdered at the age of 61. I've since sold my home and am living in a small rental. Most of my world possessions are in storage. I don't have the heart to sort through them.

My memory is extremely poor. I can tell that I am not right. I've lost 30 pounds and look 20 years older.

I was praying for my husband when he was shot. I loved him so very much and he loved me.

Where was God? How am I to ever pray again? How am I to ever trust God again?

I have a roomate in my home now who helps me get through the days. Without this roomate, I'd be in a psyche ward.

And yes, I'm seeking medical, psychiatric, spiritual help. The drugs just cloud my mind. The doctors says I'm in shock (Acute Stress Disorder) and will soon move into PTSD. The psychiatrist says I'm doing well. The psychologist may be outt of her depth on this one.

Every day of my life, I thanked God for my wonderful husband. I never ever took him for granted. Ever. I loved every thing about him.

Where is God? And how do I face the days?

Please, no flippant answers. I'm in deep pain, in a small rental home filled with boxes. I don't know where I'm going. I can't even think 10 minutes ahead without weeping.
 Quoting: Hope_Full



IMHO, justice will be a big part of moving on. Have the murderer(s) been caught?
Keilani

User ID: 76820886
United States
06/12/2019 06:33 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
How is it that none of you realize you're responding to a 3 year old thread after some idiot bumped it
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 73722498


Date is not the first thing we usually check, but still does not negate the fact we hope OP is okay and doing well, hopefully she will check in and give us an update.
nutmeg

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06/12/2019 06:39 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Thread posted 09/28/2016, but OP's most recent (06/05/2019) thread is:

Thread: No Joke: I died and after 10 minutes with NO vitals, I was resuscitated.

Last Edited by nutmeg on 06/12/2019 06:45 AM
Anonymous Coward
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United Kingdom
06/12/2019 06:47 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
It was five months ago. He was murdered at the age of 61. I've since sold my home and am living in a small rental. Most of my world possessions are in storage. I don't have the heart to sort through them.

My memory is extremely poor. I can tell that I am not right. I've lost 30 pounds and look 20 years older.

I was praying for my husband when he was shot. I loved him so very much and he loved me.

Where was God? How am I to ever pray again? How am I to ever trust God again?

I have a roomate in my home now who helps me get through the days. Without this roomate, I'd be in a psyche ward.

And yes, I'm seeking medical, psychiatric, spiritual help. The drugs just cloud my mind. The doctors says I'm in shock (Acute Stress Disorder) and will soon move into PTSD. The psychiatrist says I'm doing well. The psychologist may be outt of her depth on this one.

Every day of my life, I thanked God for my wonderful husband. I never ever took him for granted. Ever. I loved every thing about him.

Where is God? And how do I face the days?

Please, no flippant answers. I'm in deep pain, in a small rental home filled with boxes. I don't know where I'm going. I can't even think 10 minutes ahead without weeping.
 Quoting: Hope_Full


Sorry to hear your story, I don't exactly believe in God like everyone else does but I do believe in asking internally for help and the universe does answer..

But these answers are hardly ever the ones that suit you, instead a lot of the time they are completely opposite and this causes frustration, confusion and giving up asking for anything else should the need arise - I think this is known as loss of faith in religous sectors.

The thing is though and more to the point it was your husband that needed to make the request to survive and you will never know if he did or if he even requested to leave the earth. One thing for sure though if this had all never happened then it was only a matter of time before one of you parted company from the other, maybe in your mind you thought that would be you first and therefore would not be worrying about the situation you are finding yourself in now, or maybe in 10 years from now your husband would of gone first and you still would not be feeling any different to how you are now...But in the end nobody and nothing lasts forever, well nearly nothing!

I understand that somebody is responsible for cutting your husbands life short, and this must just sit horribly inside you knowing this.. But in all honesty there are a million things cutting lives short everyday, from illness to diseases, car crashes, falling off ladders etc etc.. I believe lives are mapped out well in advance, I was shot at once, I saw the flash of the gun and I took the bullet. It caused massive destruction but this is a to longer story to write about here..


Please don't give up, if your husband had gone under normal circumstances in 5 years time from now you was still going to have to learn to cope and look after yourself, if it had been you gone then your husband would of had to learnt this all by himself as well..


Ask the universe for help now, help for you and watch the signs as they can be either subtle or rather full on!


Take care of yourself Missy. ((((Hugs))))

10
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 77061453
France
06/12/2019 07:00 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I'm sorry for your loss, Hope_Full. I am praying for you and your recovery from this terrible trauma. Losing a spouse is like losing a part of yourself; a wound that seemingly never heals completely. But there is hope.

Did your spouse believe in Yahshua(Jesus)? If he did then you have nothing to worry about, as he's in a far, far better place now than we are. And if you believe in Yahshua too, you will someday be reunited with him again, in heaven. And then there will be no more tears, forever and ever.

Have faith in Yahshua, and that God is in control. It'll all work out for the glory of God in due time.

Why does God allow bad things to happen to good people?

[link to www.gotquestions.org (secure)]

Peace

hf
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 07:07 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I am so sorry for you dear. May the Supreme Being help you through this!