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I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...

 
ALL IS ONE IS ALL
I AM THAT I AM- KAN DAEK

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06/12/2019 07:26 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
It was five months ago. He was murdered at the age of 61. I've since sold my home and am living in a small rental. Most of my world possessions are in storage. I don't have the heart to sort through them.

My memory is extremely poor. I can tell that I am not right. I've lost 30 pounds and look 20 years older.

I was praying for my husband when he was shot. I loved him so very much and he loved me.

Where was God? How am I to ever pray again? How am I to ever trust God again?

I have a roomate in my home now who helps me get through the days. Without this roomate, I'd be in a psyche ward.

And yes, I'm seeking medical, psychiatric, spiritual help. The drugs just cloud my mind. The doctors says I'm in shock (Acute Stress Disorder) and will soon move into PTSD. The psychiatrist says I'm doing well. The psychologist may be outt of her depth on this one.

Every day of my life, I thanked God for my wonderful husband. I never ever took him for granted. Ever. I loved every thing about him.

Where is God? And how do I face the days?

Please, no flippant answers. I'm in deep pain, in a small rental home filled with boxes. I don't know where I'm going. I can't even think 10 minutes ahead without weeping.
 Quoting: Hope_Full


God is within YOU and I would suggest going there first and take him out of the sky beloved. hfhugs 1 YOU MUST LIVE YOURSELF regards of the situations at hand to grow your spirit.
There Can Be NO Peace in the Heart or Progress in the Mind unless one falls wholeheartedly in love with Truth and IDEALS of Eternal Realities.

Mankind is on the march toward a new and unrevealed planetary destiny.


"MY SPIRIT, YOU ARE OMNIPOTENT. YOUR NAME IS HOLY. MAY YOUR REALM BE INCARNATE IN ME. MAY YOUR POWER REVEAL ITSELF WITHIN ME, ON EARTH AND IN THE HEAVEN. GIVE ME TODAY MY DAILY BREAD, AND THUS, LET ME RECOGNIZE MY TRANSGRESSIONS AND ERRORS, AND I SHALL RECOGNIZE THE TRUTH. AND DO NOT LEAD ME INTO TEMPTATION AND CONFUSION, BUT DELIVER ME FROM ERROR. FOR YOURS IS THE REALM WITHIN ME AND THE POWER AND THE KNOWLEDGE FOREVER,
AMEN.


Wisdom is not given, it is earned, and experience is the bestower.

Rejoice, for the world of ABSOLUTE TRANSPARENCY approaches, and decisions will be made according to the purity of your motives, for the eye of the Divine is an all-seeing eye, capable of glimpsing every flutter of the soul, knowing every yearning of your being and – incredible though it may seem – supporting every aspect of your own DIVINE PLAN.


God-consciousness, as it is experienced by an evolving mortal of the realms, must consist of three varying factors, three differential levels of reality realization. There is first the mind consciousness—the comprehension of the idea of God. Then follows the soul consciousness—the realization of the ideal of God. Last, dawns the spirit consciousness—the realization of the spirit reality of God. By the unification of these factors of the divine realization, no matter how incomplete, the mortal personality at all times overspreads all conscious levels with a realization of the personality of God.

the registered number of this world out of 5.6 Trillion evolutionary worlds bearing Human life.. is 5,342,482,337,666. There is nothing evil about 666. Just IGNORANCE and mind controlling.
ChipModerator
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06/12/2019 07:26 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I'm so sorry.

flowers

"I don't give a tuppenny fuck about your moral conundrum, you meat-headed shit-sack." ~Bill the Butcher

"Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." ~Arthur C. Clarke

"He's a nut-bag! Just because the fucker's got a library card doesn't make him Yoda!" ~David Mills ~ Se7en


"THE PLANET IS FINE! THE PEOPLE ARE FUCKED" ~George Carlin


every-citizen
Cynical Realist
Realistically Cynical

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06/12/2019 07:35 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
OP.... Im going to be respectful here but I do have some issues with your original post.

I have read many of your other posts over the month and everything I read leads me to think there are many inconsistencies....

I wont high light the threads nor the posts but all the evidence is there for anyone to read.

I have a simple question and again I say this respectfully but.....

What is it you are seeking from posting the many contradictions in all your posts?

My mind is drawn towards these posts being made up and in some parts actually role playing a bereaved victim... Has anything truly happened that promotes you to seek others sympathy and empathy?

Please enlighten me on this I have a great dissonance in your posts... I really want to get to the bottom of this.
.... And thats coming from an old Cynic

A Brit quote. Cynical Serialist

The killer of trolls
ALL IS ONE IS ALL
I AM THAT I AM- KAN DAEK

User ID: 77711363
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06/12/2019 07:39 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
OP.... Im going to be respectful here but I do have some issues with your original post.

I have read many of your other posts over the month and everything I read leads me to think there are many inconsistencies....

I wont high light the threads nor the posts but all the evidence is there for anyone to read.

I have a simple question and again I say this respectfully but.....

What is it you are seeking from posting the many contradictions in all your posts?

My mind is drawn towards these posts being made up and in some parts actually role playing a bereaved victim... Has anything truly happened that promotes you to seek others sympathy and empathy?

Please enlighten me on this I have a great dissonance in your posts... I really want to get to the bottom of this.
 Quoting: Cynical Realist


bump
There Can Be NO Peace in the Heart or Progress in the Mind unless one falls wholeheartedly in love with Truth and IDEALS of Eternal Realities.

Mankind is on the march toward a new and unrevealed planetary destiny.


"MY SPIRIT, YOU ARE OMNIPOTENT. YOUR NAME IS HOLY. MAY YOUR REALM BE INCARNATE IN ME. MAY YOUR POWER REVEAL ITSELF WITHIN ME, ON EARTH AND IN THE HEAVEN. GIVE ME TODAY MY DAILY BREAD, AND THUS, LET ME RECOGNIZE MY TRANSGRESSIONS AND ERRORS, AND I SHALL RECOGNIZE THE TRUTH. AND DO NOT LEAD ME INTO TEMPTATION AND CONFUSION, BUT DELIVER ME FROM ERROR. FOR YOURS IS THE REALM WITHIN ME AND THE POWER AND THE KNOWLEDGE FOREVER,
AMEN.


Wisdom is not given, it is earned, and experience is the bestower.

Rejoice, for the world of ABSOLUTE TRANSPARENCY approaches, and decisions will be made according to the purity of your motives, for the eye of the Divine is an all-seeing eye, capable of glimpsing every flutter of the soul, knowing every yearning of your being and – incredible though it may seem – supporting every aspect of your own DIVINE PLAN.


God-consciousness, as it is experienced by an evolving mortal of the realms, must consist of three varying factors, three differential levels of reality realization. There is first the mind consciousness—the comprehension of the idea of God. Then follows the soul consciousness—the realization of the ideal of God. Last, dawns the spirit consciousness—the realization of the spirit reality of God. By the unification of these factors of the divine realization, no matter how incomplete, the mortal personality at all times overspreads all conscious levels with a realization of the personality of God.

the registered number of this world out of 5.6 Trillion evolutionary worlds bearing Human life.. is 5,342,482,337,666. There is nothing evil about 666. Just IGNORANCE and mind controlling.
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 07:40 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I understand what you are going through. You are not alone, there are many of us who've lost the love's of our life. Nonetheless, in keeping a proper perspective, he Holy Bible informs us that God is love, and that in Him is no shadow of turning. We can trust than that, likewise according to scripture, everything works together for good to those that love God and are the called according to His purpose.

I will not claim to know why God allowed this tradgedy to happen to you. But if we read the accounts of Job, the apostles, or even just Consider the Life of the Spotless Son of God and His fate, we see that suffering and seeming injustice tend to befall those who who'd generally deem least deserving.

God wants to refine you, make you more like, and bring you even closer to Him, and to know Him better. Seek answers in the Holy Word of God (get a king james Bible), and trust in Him. In due time He will heal you, and grant you more peace than you've ever known, and you'll say, though you still miss HIm, and the loss tremendous, you wouldn't have it any other way. Trust me as someone who's been through it personally!
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 07:40 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
It was five months ago. He was murdered at the age of 61. I've since sold my home and am living in a small rental. Most of my world possessions are in storage. I don't have the heart to sort through them.

My memory is extremely poor. I can tell that I am not right. I've lost 30 pounds and look 20 years older.

I was praying for my husband when he was shot. I loved him so very much and he loved me.

Where was God? How am I to ever pray again? How am I to ever trust God again?

I have a roomate in my home now who helps me get through the days. Without this roomate, I'd be in a psyche ward.

And yes, I'm seeking medical, psychiatric, spiritual help. The drugs just cloud my mind. The doctors says I'm in shock (Acute Stress Disorder) and will soon move into PTSD. The psychiatrist says I'm doing well. The psychologist may be outt of her depth on this one.

Every day of my life, I thanked God for my wonderful husband. I never ever took him for granted. Ever. I loved every thing about him.

Where is God? And how do I face the days?

Please, no flippant answers. I'm in deep pain, in a small rental home filled with boxes. I don't know where I'm going. I can't even think 10 minutes ahead without weeping.
 Quoting: Hope_Full


Im so very sorry you are in such straights
Ive been through similar situation and have only survived by having friends to provide support.
You cant deal with such a loss on your own.
You have to make a routine based on getting things done and get on with life so you dont fall into a negative spiral.
If you can volunteer to help others in some way, its part of a healing process.
I pray you find comfort soon in continuing to do some good for others in need and please be careful with any of those drugs so you dont get hooked on them.
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 07:41 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Thread bumped on page 3 from 2016. So random.
Diabolical.

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06/12/2019 07:49 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
So sorry to hear about your husband. My condolences. hugs
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 07:51 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Oh and OP dont think that god has left you down.
Im of the belief that god created the environment and the rules and us as entities and left us to interact on our own in this universe.
Thinking that god made this happen to you for some reason is not healthy. Bad shit just happens, not because god makes it happen.
Me trying to help you is part of my own grieving processes.
Just try to manage you day to day affairs and constructive routines and dont take this personally, cause bad things happen to everyone eventually.
Its normal to replay horrible events over and over in your head but eventually you have to cover those visions with an overlay of new positive events doing positive things for others.
Thats how I deal with it, and it works eventually if you collect new, positive events to dull the sharpness of your current memories of everything associated with it.
Nonentity

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06/12/2019 07:52 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
It was five months ago. He was murdered at the age of 61. I've since sold my home and am living in a small rental. Most of my world possessions are in storage. I don't have the heart to sort through them.

My memory is extremely poor. I can tell that I am not right. I've lost 30 pounds and look 20 years older.

I was praying for my husband when he was shot. I loved him so very much and he loved me.

Where was God? How am I to ever pray again? How am I to ever trust God again?

I have a roomate in my home now who helps me get through the days. Without this roomate, I'd be in a psyche ward.

And yes, I'm seeking medical, psychiatric, spiritual help. The drugs just cloud my mind. The doctors says I'm in shock (Acute Stress Disorder) and will soon move into PTSD. The psychiatrist says I'm doing well. The psychologist may be outt of her depth on this one.

Every day of my life, I thanked God for my wonderful husband. I never ever took him for granted. Ever. I loved every thing about him.

Where is God? And how do I face the days?

Please, no flippant answers. I'm in deep pain, in a small rental home filled with boxes. I don't know where I'm going. I can't even think 10 minutes ahead without weeping.
 Quoting: Hope_Full


It's ok to cry, let it out.

Let it all out.

You may find some much needed rest and peace from your pain.


God Bless you
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 07:53 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Thread bumped on page 3 from 2016. So random.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75982094


Well the positive waves still apply.
This kind of loss or similar will happen to everyone eventually.
Best be prepared for that day when you get the call and your world changes forever.
Cynical Realist
Realistically Cynical

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06/12/2019 07:57 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I am coming up on the 2 yr mark of my hubs death and THIS SHIT IS INTOLERABLE!

So what is it, did your hubs die 3 yrs ago, last year, did he put a gun in his mouth, did some else shoot him???? So this is your lie today, your posts suggest other stories. From someone who truly lost someone, I say FU and your lies...absolutely disgusting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 Quoting: Serepta Ann


Im inclined to believe your response.....

One of the problems when someone posts something that is not real....it can resonate with others.... and it has done so with you Serepta.

I hope the pain and emotions this thread has brought up in you will soon pass again. I believe you!!!

Green Karma for you....

Last Edited by Cynical Realist on 06/12/2019 07:58 AM
.... And thats coming from an old Cynic

A Brit quote. Cynical Serialist

The killer of trolls
janedoenut

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06/12/2019 07:57 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
So many prayers for you.
“If you'll let me tell you what I imagine about myself, you'll find it a lot more interesting” –Anne Shirley


Seemingly your father nor mother taught you that as a man, it's your job to protect women and lead families. As men, had you done your job, you wouldn't be living in a matriarchal society.
MissCleo

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06/12/2019 08:01 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Thread from 2016. Someone personal pinned it.

Was this a search for Christians?

Lots of monkey business going on here today.
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 08:01 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
i prayed my guts out for my son, who died anyways. i lost most of my faith and spirituality after that. this was 13 years ago, it wasn't until just recently that i have found my way back and that was after a dream/visit from him 3 months ago.

hang in there
MissCleo

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06/12/2019 08:02 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I'm so sorry.

flowers
 Quoting: Chip


can you explain how this old thread popped back up?
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 08:02 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Sorry for your loss.
My Mom, Dad, Brother and Granddad all died when I was 6 years old, within a 6 month period. Im 50 now, and been looking ever since what happens after death.

The biblical stories are not what we were told.
Dont let the ET name in the video description below scare you off, you need to hear this info and its the only vid I can think of with all of it in one vid, plus sources stated so you can read deeper.

watch first 40 mins:
ET origins of DNA - S & C Vol.4 | Dan Winter


Then this interview.
Trust me please.
Just watch with open mind, and make your decisions after.

DANIEL WINTER - BTA Special Guest


IT comes down to:
How big is your Aura
Can you take your wits/memory with you upon death.
If not you are reincarnated back here on earth in new body with "NO" memory.
They say we have done this many, many times.

So they say practice lucid dreaming. (Out of body experience/remote viewing/astral projection)

I have issues trying to lucid dream, so I await and I am taking it all in baby steps.
I dont trust nothing down here.
this is the simulation.


So....good luck, stay strong.
Know that all is not as it seems.
Be kind patient and await.
Stay healthy, stay away from technology as much as you can.

Long story short:
What came to be known as god(s), who were literally Medium Grade Interventionist Reptilian klutz Genetic Engineers.
Enki/Enlil/{Archons} and the bunch

Hebrew being a software environment for genetic interventionist.

Archangels Gabriel and Michael were Half-Brother Deities'... known in Ancient Sumeria-Mesopotamia as 'Enlil and Enki'. Enki was the Serpent in the Garden, Anu or son Enlil or Marduk rumored to be YHWH.

Archangel Gabriel visited Mother Mary, Joseph Smith and Mohammad.
I wonder who Gabriel really is.

My thoughts and Heart go out to you.
Stay strong keep him in your thoughts always with love and gratitude and later it will hopefully make sense to us.
jt210

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06/12/2019 08:03 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Thread bumped on page 3 from 2016. So random.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75982094


Saw this earlier this morning. Was wondering how long it would be before someone noticed.
So, AOC was walking through the Bronx. She came upon a set of tracks. She said to herself, "Oh look, deer tracks." She looked again and said, "Oh wait, those are bear tracks". Pondered a little more and said, "Oh silly me, those are rabbit...." The train hit her.
Cynical Realist
Realistically Cynical

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06/12/2019 08:09 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I would be inclined to un pin this thread..... Its not constructive and will play on emotions in some form....
.... And thats coming from an old Cynic

A Brit quote. Cynical Serialist

The killer of trolls
Pooka

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06/12/2019 08:09 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Mathew 18:20
"For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them."


So since many are gathered here, I wish 2 more will join me in this prayer.

Lord Jesus Christ, our Shephard and king of kings, we ask you to communicate to our Father, who is in Heaven, to bring peace to the heart of Hope Full, that she may overcome her grieving for he much loved husband.
Please light back your light into her through the Holy Spirit, and heal her of her pain.
Amen.
 Quoting: LTHN.


Agreed in prayer. Amen and Amen
Prayer is the most powerful force on earth.

“I care not for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it.” Abraham Lincoln

I sign all karma given. Would that those giving it to me followed suit.
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 08:17 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
What does it matter an old thread, maybe someone who needs to see something in it sees it because its being.....seen.
03

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06/12/2019 08:17 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Sorry for your loss OP. I pray you find relief and justice.
07070707070707
MissCleo

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06/12/2019 08:17 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I would be inclined to un pin this thread..... Its not constructive and will play on emotions in some form....
 Quoting: Cynical Realist


yes.

I feel deceived and used.
hahah.
Checking my emotions and ready for battle now.
MissCleo

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06/12/2019 08:19 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Thread: No Joke: I died and after 10 minutes with NO vitals, I was resuscitated.

her other thread, more current.

wondering if she died to try to see husband?
and God sent her back and said it wasn't her time...

Last Edited by MissCleo on 06/12/2019 08:19 AM
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 08:19 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
It was five months ago. He was murdered at the age of 61. I've since sold my home and am living in a small rental. Most of my world possessions are in storage. I don't have the heart to sort through them.

My memory is extremely poor. I can tell that I am not right. I've lost 30 pounds and look 20 years older.

I was praying for my husband when he was shot. I loved him so very much and he loved me.

Where was God? How am I to ever pray again? How am I to ever trust God again?

I have a roomate in my home now who helps me get through the days. Without this roomate, I'd be in a psyche ward.

And yes, I'm seeking medical, psychiatric, spiritual help. The drugs just cloud my mind. The doctors says I'm in shock (Acute Stress Disorder) and will soon move into PTSD. The psychiatrist says I'm doing well. The psychologist may be outt of her depth on this one.

Every day of my life, I thanked God for my wonderful husband. I never ever took him for granted. Ever. I loved every thing about him.

Where is God? And how do I face the days?

Please, no flippant answers. I'm in deep pain, in a small rental home filled with boxes. I don't know where I'm going. I can't even think 10 minutes ahead without weeping.
 Quoting: Hope_Full


Here-in lies the paradox of the life we experience and the true wisdom of Jesus.

1 John 2:15-17 Do not love this world nor the things it offers you, for when you love the world, you do not have the love of the Father in you.

We all know we are going to die as an inevitability and yet we still allow ourselves to feel attached to the things of this world. Even when we attain a higher sense of clarity in spirituality we generally still find ourselves clinging to our emotional attachments.

Pay unto Ceasar that which is Ceasars (earthly attachments) and pay unto God that which is God's (your soul). The more attachments you have in this life the more pain you will inevitably feel. BUT the good news is that this pain is the most beautiful thing to be experienced when those attachments come from your heart.

DO NOT FEAR!!!!! That is my ultimate message. Fear is putting your faith in the Devil.
Cynical Realist
Realistically Cynical

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06/12/2019 08:21 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
What does it matter an old thread, maybe someone who needs to see something in it sees it because its being.....seen.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 55201025


Its a very subjective thread and has serious questions regarding its validity...... Reading one response has had the affect of resonance, and in a negative way.
.... And thats coming from an old Cynic

A Brit quote. Cynical Serialist

The killer of trolls
MissCleo

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06/12/2019 08:21 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Or maybe this is a reminder that we put our lives out there in this forum for everyone to see. And that's brilliant and noble... but does it expose us too much?

As a Christian I believe in virtue first and forefront, so truth should not be fearful.
MissCleo

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06/12/2019 08:22 AM

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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
What does it matter an old thread, maybe someone who needs to see something in it sees it because its being.....seen.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 55201025


Its a very subjective thread and has serious questions regarding its validity...... Reading one response has had the affect of resonance, and in a negative way.
 Quoting: Cynical Realist


and depends on who's datamining the responses, timing, information, consistency, names and numbers.
Anonymous Coward
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06/12/2019 08:23 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
I am sorry life has been so cruel to you.

I would gladly give you some of my life to somehow make you happier.

May the universe bestow blessings and happiness upon thee. So be it.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 72379888


What a beautiful sentiment... thank you.

Praying for you OP, this world is heaven and hell all wrapped in one. For every winner there's a loser, nature is the same way, savage and heartbreaking. Wish i had the answer but time does mute all wounds, it's always there over your shoulder, but eventually it fades to some degree and the sun shines again. One day a time and know your husband wants you to flourish and embrace what time we all have left. I know loss and it's hard, very hard. My hobbies help fill the void and idle time now. Find one and embrace it. Godbless.
Chuckles

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06/12/2019 08:28 AM
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Re: I'm in shock from the sudden death of my beloved husband...
Get out in the forest and mountains. Shinrin-yoku. It is the cornerstone of Japanese preventative health care. Take a long hike somewhere beautiful. Take this roommate with you unless you are comfortable going by yourself.

Time is the only thing that will heal but nature will take the edge off and point The Way.
"Anything worth doing is worth doing badly."
-G.K. Chesterton

I am Android 17.