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I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 7236978
United Kingdom
12/21/2016 06:00 PM
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I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
IDK why, but no other chick will do. I keep bypassing women or just think 'I'll get bored of you soon enough'. Then, when I just hold out long enough, a chick comes into my life who just knocks my socks off.

This has just recently happened - some girl interviewed me for a job, and she was so much like my ex, ex, and other ex (looks and personality), that I got it really badly, and left the place feeling a tad spooked because it was just like being with them again.

The funny thing is, I can feel that she is attracted to me too, even though she comes off as an emotionally reserved ice queen. I just can't get her out of my fucking mind. But the problem is, every time I get with this type of chick, we always end up going to war with each other. I always feel the need to break her icy exterior, make her love me, and then I "win", if that makes sense?

Could this indicate that I'm a narcissist and this type of woman is a BPD?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 71631763
United States
12/21/2016 06:18 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
I don't know if you're a narcissist or not but it seems you're still in love with your ex. I'm not sure what that has to do with narcissism.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 73398458
Canada
12/21/2016 06:20 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
Do you know what a narcissist is?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 8066699
United States
12/21/2016 06:25 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
A narcissist is basically an asshole who thinks of his/her self as better than everyone else.

I have an uncle who fits the bill, he's incredibly selfish and steals from my Grandmother yet he is always bad mouthing other people and saying he hates thives. He's a big fat hypocritical bitch.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 7236978
United Kingdom
12/21/2016 06:36 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
I don't know if you're a narcissist or not but it seems you're still in love with your ex. I'm not sure what that has to do with narcissism.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71631763


Well, IDK. My first love was a very narcissistic woman; second chick was scornful with serious emotional outbursts; third chick was a flat out borderline; now this one... she seems to be an emotionally reserved ice queen, and I can sense that, if I got into an r/s with her, there would soon be fireworks.

IDK WTH is wrong with me, but I'm only attracted to these types of women (with the exact same looks). I don't mean to brag, but I'm good at making women fall for me because of studying so much female psychology, but when a chick is all loving and shit, I feel like the challenge is over, and I go cold. I know that's fucked up, but that's how I am. I keep going for that woman who is the hard nut to crack, but always end up fucked up from it, esp with the BPD ex.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 73646629
Australia
12/21/2016 06:39 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
IDK why, but no other chick will do. I keep bypassing women or just think 'I'll get bored of you soon enough'. Then, when I just hold out long enough, a chick comes into my life who just knocks my socks off.

This has just recently happened - some girl interviewed me for a job, and she was so much like my ex, ex, and other ex (looks and personality), that I got it really badly, and left the place feeling a tad spooked because it was just like being with them again.

The funny thing is, I can feel that she is attracted to me too, even though she comes off as an emotionally reserved ice queen. I just can't get her out of my fucking mind. But the problem is, every time I get with this type of chick, we always end up going to war with each other. I always feel the need to break her icy exterior, make her love me, and then I "win", if that makes sense?

Could this indicate that I'm a narcissist and this type of woman is a BPD?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


Grow up you little boy and become a man and look for a lifelong partner, not some little tramp . What is wrong with men these days !!!!!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 8066699
United States
12/21/2016 06:39 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
I don't know if you're a narcissist or not but it seems you're still in love with your ex. I'm not sure what that has to do with narcissism.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71631763


Well, IDK. My first love was a very narcissistic woman; second chick was scornful with serious emotional outbursts; third chick was a flat out borderline; now this one... she seems to be an emotionally reserved ice queen, and I can sense that, if I got into an r/s with her, there would soon be fireworks.

IDK WTH is wrong with me, but I'm only attracted to these types of women (with the exact same looks). I don't mean to brag, but I'm good at making women fall for me because of studying so much female psychology, but when a chick is all loving and shit, I feel like the challenge is over, and I go cold. I know that's fucked up, but that's how I am. I keep going for that woman who is the hard nut to crack, but always end up fucked up from it, esp with the BPD ex.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


Most women are narcissists these days, just because you're attracted to a narcissist doesn't make you a narcissist.

I am divorced and can't even get a date anymore so it could be worse, I guess? At least you can get women.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 7236978
United Kingdom
12/21/2016 06:40 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
Do you know what a narcissist is?
 Quoting: Anonymous-Girl


I've been told I am one. I have adored my reflection in the mirror for as long as I can remember (just like the Narcissus myth), and constantly looking for ways to improve my looks or be seductive. In fact, it is innate - I know how to make facial expressions / body language / tone of voice, etc, that touch a woman's emotional buttons, and I'm presently trying to charm this ice queen.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 13560598
Australia
12/21/2016 06:41 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
I'm good at making women fall for me because of studying so much female psychology, but when a chick is all loving and shit, I feel like the challenge is over, and I go cold.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


That kind of thing is usually experienced by females.

WTF OP you're the opposite of standard.


Maybe you're a male lesbian?
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 7236978
United Kingdom
12/21/2016 06:43 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
A narcissist is basically an asshole who thinks of his/her self as better than everyone else.

I have an uncle who fits the bill, he's incredibly selfish and steals from my Grandmother yet he is always bad mouthing other people and saying he hates thives. He's a big fat hypocritical bitch.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 8066699


Well, i don't steal from anyone or badmouth others, but I suppose I give off an air of arrogance around other people. Like, around "common" people I feel contempt towards them, and seek to not "lower" myself to their standards.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 73398458
Canada
12/21/2016 06:44 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
Do you know what a narcissist is?
 Quoting: Anonymous-Girl


I've been told I am one. I have adored my reflection in the mirror for as long as I can remember (just like the Narcissus myth), and constantly looking for ways to improve my looks or be seductive. In fact, it is innate - I know how to make facial expressions / body language / tone of voice, etc, that touch a woman's emotional buttons, and I'm presently trying to charm this ice queen.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


It doesn't really sound like you care about any of the women. It's a game to you, a challenge, nothing more beyond that.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 7236978
United Kingdom
12/21/2016 06:49 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
Do you know what a narcissist is?
 Quoting: Anonymous-Girl


I've been told I am one. I have adored my reflection in the mirror for as long as I can remember (just like the Narcissus myth), and constantly looking for ways to improve my looks or be seductive. In fact, it is innate - I know how to make facial expressions / body language / tone of voice, etc, that touch a woman's emotional buttons, and I'm presently trying to charm this ice queen.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


It doesn't really sound like you care about any of the women. It's a game to you, a challenge, nothing more beyond that.
 Quoting: Anonymous-Girl


Well, I do actually have standards because I deliberately ignore women who don't have the traits of my ex's, therefore I bypass them and wont use them for sex or anything else. So I'm not all bad; I just need to find a way of breaking my attraction to these types of women. They just do it for me so bad, though.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 13560598
Australia
12/21/2016 06:50 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
You sure post "I" enough to make someone suspicious that you COULD be a narcissist.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 73398458
Canada
12/21/2016 06:51 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
Do you know what a narcissist is?
 Quoting: Anonymous-Girl


I've been told I am one. I have adored my reflection in the mirror for as long as I can remember (just like the Narcissus myth), and constantly looking for ways to improve my looks or be seductive. In fact, it is innate - I know how to make facial expressions / body language / tone of voice, etc, that touch a woman's emotional buttons, and I'm presently trying to charm this ice queen.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


It doesn't really sound like you care about any of the women. It's a game to you, a challenge, nothing more beyond that.
 Quoting: Anonymous-Girl


Well, I do actually have standards because I deliberately ignore women who don't have the traits of my ex's, therefore I bypass them and wont use them for sex or anything else. So I'm not all bad; I just need to find a way of breaking my attraction to these types of women. They just do it for me so bad, though.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


I didn't say you were bad. It's a superficial attraction based on your own ego. Sounds like it's just a game.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 7236978
United Kingdom
12/21/2016 06:55 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
You sure post "I" enough to make someone suspicious that you COULD be a narcissist.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 13560598


Yes, perhaps, but I don't love and leave any girl, nor swindle them out of money. In my mind, if I can just melt the ice queen, then I will feel ultimately validated, and everything will be great.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 65331861
United States
12/21/2016 06:58 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
I don't know if you're a narcissist or not but it seems you're still in love with your ex. I'm not sure what that has to do with narcissism.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71631763


Well, IDK. My first love was a very narcissistic woman; second chick was scornful with serious emotional outbursts; third chick was a flat out borderline; now this one... she seems to be an emotionally reserved ice queen, and I can sense that, if I got into an r/s with her, there would soon be fireworks.

IDK WTH is wrong with me, but I'm only attracted to these types of women (with the exact same looks). I don't mean to brag, but I'm good at making women fall for me because of studying so much female psychology, but when a chick is all loving and shit, I feel like the challenge is over, and I go cold. I know that's fucked up, but that's how I am. I keep going for that woman who is the hard nut to crack, but always end up fucked up from it, esp with the BPD ex.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


Sounds more like you are a masochist!
Was your mommy demanding and nuts, too?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 8066699
United States
12/21/2016 06:58 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
I might say you have a few narcissistic traits but it's more that you're a confident person with standards and that doesn't make you a bad person in itself really but if you only go for women that make your life miserable it only hurts one person, yourself.

Just find some that works for you. Everybody wants a person they're attracted to, but some of us are on the less attractive end and some are on the more attractive end be glad you're blessed but if you're really trying to change anything about yourself stop looking down on people who are less blessed than you that doesn't mean you have to date people you aren't attracted to but just try to put yourself in others shoes that nobody can help how they look for the most part. If someone is not attractive to you that's not a reason to be rude to them, but that also doesn't mean you have to marry them. I always treat people with respect until they disrespect me.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 7236978
United Kingdom
12/21/2016 06:59 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
...


I've been told I am one. I have adored my reflection in the mirror for as long as I can remember (just like the Narcissus myth), and constantly looking for ways to improve my looks or be seductive. In fact, it is innate - I know how to make facial expressions / body language / tone of voice, etc, that touch a woman's emotional buttons, and I'm presently trying to charm this ice queen.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


It doesn't really sound like you care about any of the women. It's a game to you, a challenge, nothing more beyond that.
 Quoting: Anonymous-Girl


Well, I do actually have standards because I deliberately ignore women who don't have the traits of my ex's, therefore I bypass them and wont use them for sex or anything else. So I'm not all bad; I just need to find a way of breaking my attraction to these types of women. They just do it for me so bad, though.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


I didn't say you were bad. It's a superficial attraction based on your own ego. Sounds like it's just a game.
 Quoting: Anonymous-Girl


Or more like, I can't accept being actually loved because I don't trust it will last, and I'll be let down, so I go for the woman who I know will never be able to give me it.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 65331861
United States
12/21/2016 07:10 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
Or more like, I can't accept being actually loved because I don't trust it will last, and I'll be let down, so I go for the woman who I know will never be able to give me it.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


Bingo.

Learn to value yourself, love.
Love yourself.
hf
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 72713510
United States
12/21/2016 07:24 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
Yeah. You sound like a narcissist. You think she's into you because you are into her. She's cold to you but you see this as a sign she's into you. You are gonna think every woman that reminds you of your ex is into you but they are not. I met a guy on social media. He thinks the only reason I use social media because "I'm into him". He was like the only reason you are here is because I'm here. I was like why would I be into you? He was like I'm sexy. I have a six pack. He told me he's in a band and he plays guitar. Plus he's a manager and he owes a company in Chicago. I never saw any of his pictures. One of those chat sites where you can talk to multiple people online and a group of people can talk each other. The guy sends me Pam asking me to date him but I decline. We are in two different states. I don't see how it's gonna work out. Then he was like move to Chicago. I decline again.
BoatyMcBoatFace

User ID: 73238752
United States
12/21/2016 07:27 PM

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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
IDK why, but no other chick will do. I keep bypassing women or just think 'I'll get bored of you soon enough'. Then, when I just hold out long enough, a chick comes into my life who just knocks my socks off.

This has just recently happened - some girl interviewed me for a job, and she was so much like my ex, ex, and other ex (looks and personality), that I got it really badly, and left the place feeling a tad spooked because it was just like being with them again.

The funny thing is, I can feel that she is attracted to me too, even though she comes off as an emotionally reserved ice queen. I just can't get her out of my fucking mind. But the problem is, every time I get with this type of chick, we always end up going to war with each other. I always feel the need to break her icy exterior, make her love me, and then I "win", if that makes sense?

Could this indicate that I'm a narcissist and this type of woman is a BPD?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


No, you're an idiot and haven't learned your lesson.
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Thoughts do not come from you nor God; you do not create thoughts; you are not your thoughts; every thought is a lie.
- 2 Corinthians 10:5 - [link to www.biblegateway.com (secure)]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 49874791
United States
12/21/2016 07:31 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
Not a narcissist and maybe you are not in love with the ex but the looks, personality and much more intricate things that attracted you to your ex, will attract you to others with the same attributes.
Pink Lil Panties

User ID: 72408086
United States
12/21/2016 07:42 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
I had a roommate who was the same way. I told her, "you know he is a straight up asshole,right? Why are you still with him?" She smirked and tilted her head and said it was like breaking-in a horse. She would wear them in until they fell madly in love with her and then break up with them. Like a challenge and conquer kind of scheme. I guess everyone has their kink. rockon
Pink Lil Panties
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 73645105
United States
12/21/2016 08:11 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
Probably not the best idea to come to any forum online asking if you have some type of mental health diagnosis. Might try finding a trained professional doctor-type therapist in your area, and ask them.

.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 73213558
Belgium
12/21/2016 08:15 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
I'm doing the same, OP. I can't help it.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 73398458
Canada
12/21/2016 08:24 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
...


It doesn't really sound like you care about any of the women. It's a game to you, a challenge, nothing more beyond that.
 Quoting: Anonymous-Girl


Well, I do actually have standards because I deliberately ignore women who don't have the traits of my ex's, therefore I bypass them and wont use them for sex or anything else. So I'm not all bad; I just need to find a way of breaking my attraction to these types of women. They just do it for me so bad, though.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978


I didn't say you were bad. It's a superficial attraction based on your own ego. Sounds like it's just a game.
 Quoting: Anonymous-Girl


Or more like, I can't accept being actually loved because I don't trust it will last, and I'll be let down, so I go for the woman who I know will never be able to give me it.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978



No, I don't think that's it. You just went on and on about admiring yourself in the mirror. You go after women who are 'ice queens' because you want the notch in your belt as evidence that you were the one to get through their tough exterior. Then, once you've achieved that, you get bored and move on to the next one.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 72031360
United States
12/21/2016 08:35 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
Or more like, I can't accept being actually loved because I don't trust it will last, and I'll be let down, so I go for the woman who I know will never be able to give me it.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 72031360
United States
12/21/2016 08:35 PM
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Re: I keep going for chicks who look and remind me of my ex's. Am i a narcissist?
Or more like, I can't accept being actually loved because I don't trust it will last, and I'll be let down, so I go for the woman who I know will never be able to give me it.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 7236978

 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 72031360


sounds like me





GLP