Urgent, Dear President Trump: Please Pardon Assange and Snowden

Dear President Trump:

On behalf of the constitution and the people of the United States, we ask that you expeditiously consider pardoning, in an admittedly bold move, Julian Assange and Edward Snowden, an initiative that will smite, enrage, and perplex your opponents, only further exposing them for whom they truly are, and furthermore duly appoint, an admittedly additional bold move, Mr. Assange and Mr. Snowden, to head a Presidential Commision on cyber security, and civil liberties.

This act will only empower the sovereign individual, and will only give great encourage and hope to the peoples around the world.

Thank You For Listening

The good and unique citizens of the United States of America