Road Trip through Mexico

Get out of the border zone. Arrive at the border with a full tank, and don't stop driving south until it is gone. Then you will be safe.

When you get pulled over by the cops, if you hand them your license, they'll keep it and make you pay them ransom to get it back.

If you think you will have a leisurely drive, then you have some shit to learn.

and stay the fuck away from Tampico…. Gawd….

Under no circumstance should you travel into Mexico with a firearm or even accidentally leaving a few bullets in you Tacoma could land you in federal prison.

You'll be fine, my dad drives all over Mexico, I myself have traveled Mexico extensively. Don't be stupid, stay on the roads and only stop at places that have relatively decent infrastructure. Don't venture off into the wilderness or take shortcuts. Always and I mean always use the paid toll highways, do not, I repeat, do not take the free roads.

So glad you asked…. When driving during the day, you can see the boulders resting harmlessly on the side of the road…. at night… not so much… and these boulders somehow magically walk into the road…. it's dark…. you either a) don't see boulders and drive over them and out comes your transmission OR b) you see boulders at last minute, swerve to avoid them and crash into a ditch… in any case, your Mexican friends will appear quickly out of nowhere and steal you blind…. gads man, EVEN MEXICANS DON'T DRIVE AT NIGHT, AND GUATEMALA??? EVEN WORSE

We've driven to Mexico 3 times
Mazatlan

Never had a problem

No driving at night because you don't know the roads
Stay on the toll roads
They are awesome

now THAT is funny! LOL

My cousin lives in Ajijic. She and her husband are 2 of many expats who live there and it is freaking gorgeous. They retired down there and live like kings.

That was. I can add to the hilarity:

Get a vanity license plate that reads YO SOY GRINGO

Address every male in Mexico as Senor Marincon.

Wear expensive duds and jewelry, especially an expensive watch.

Ask for directions only in English and act very timid.

Try drinking their water…it can't possibly be as bad as everyone says.




[just kidding, pendejos!]

Remember not FLASH the CASH publicly....have it folded in your hand ready to hand it to him. You'll be able to tell whether he'll take the money (the gleam of greed in his eyes and by his exact words in English that he has down pat..."This is very serious problem, hombre, muy serioso....Pero..."

He'll say something to save face, to hide his guilt, like "Maybe we can fix it now"...

You can also act dumb and say "Can I help save you and the Court time by paying the fine now?"....This was my approach at least a half dozen times while I was working in the DR...

Just "palm" the $$$ when you fork it over and act like you're doing the legal and customary thing...

It's all about "saving face"....treat him respectfully during the entire ordeal.

This probably goes without saying but I wouldn't suggest taking the trip without having at least one buddy with you...

Good luck, I plan on doing the same on motorcycle with a couple of other bikers.

Does the OP speak Spanish? It helps. Jamaica is far more dangerous than Mexico, for example, so is the Dominican Republic. Too many people here are focusing on hype and stereotypes from the movies.
I feel safer in Mexico than I do in most of the US cities.

Better a sticker with 'Huyendo de Trump'