I have an in-law with many of the same symptoms you describe. She went through hell with mis-diagnosis. Fibromyalgia is basically a made-up disease to cover the mystery of the various symptoms. After several YEARS of a variety of "illnesses", it was discovered she really had Lymes Disease from being bitten by a tick which can also now transmit a virus that can cause encephalopathy and lots of other problems which can be life threatening.

As to the problem with the husband, his response to being "unhappy" is TYPICAL of cheaters who are "looking for love in all the wrong places". INVARIABLY they reach a point of discovery that they still "love" their wives--but they also invariably stay in that loveless situation, often for the rest of their lives because the problem(s) have nothing to do with love, selfishness, or any of the other reasons given as to why he left in the first place. You can beat up on yourself all day, but it will not change the FACT that the problems all lie with the husband. I have seen the same thing happen all over again, even after reconciliation.

The husband's attempt at communication was all about HIM and HIS troubles--not about YOURS. There is no doubt in HIS mind who is at fault for HIS situation. It is TOTALLY HIM. Maybe you WERE a selfish b***h, but we all are at one point or another. First step, stop beating up on yourself. Stop blaming yourself and seeking understanding from HIM. Chances are very good that it will change nothing and he will probably FEAR making a worse mistake by leaving HER. YOU have probably done all that is necessary (through repentance of your "faults"), but a second diagnosis probably may help you to discover the ACTUAL health problem you have.

YOUR main problem is overthinking which can drive you crazy and solves nothing. However, you need to obviously move beyond this. Eventually, you will move beyond your own "fears" of doing wrong things and leaving "loose ends". The loose ends are all your own. It certainly seems that you have pressing problems AT HOME. You cannot solve all those problems by clearing up loose ends that your ex DOES NOT HAVE. In a very real sense, he was CHEATING ON HER WITH YOU, and probably STARTED it with HER in much the same way as YOU. If HE was repenting of his adultery, it would be different. He was repenting of the RESULT of his sin--not the sin. Chances are also very good that this would only make HIM feel better and YOU coming to the realization that nothing will change for YOU.

You seem to be grasping at straws and belittling yourself. You are showing that you are a caring, loving, compassionate person trying to do all things--especially when you are facing your own mortality. Calling for supernatural help is very dangerous. There are all kinds of supernatural influences--some of which may have caused your problem to begin with. In the final analysis, it may be ALL about these supernatural forces which seem to be attacking YOU specifically. YOU may be the only stable person in your environment. If so, YOU are the supreme object of God's regard. You need to get right with HIM. Without that, NOTHING ELSE MATTERS. It will all just be an "exercise in futility". Everybody will lose. All will be lost as if they never existed. YOU are the most important part of this equation. BELIEVE IT. Build upon THAT and everything else will fall in place. That is about as SUPER Natural as it gets.