Communication

It has been a long time since this account was last logged into. Its also been a long time since these emotions have welled up in my soul.

Recently, many things have taken place to erect a life-long drive of mine that i felt once before. 9 months ago my cousin, my girlfriend and I decided to buy an rv to live in. And we did. We were well on our way to saving money and just getting used to this new rv life. And as we had planned for, we got kicked off the property we were on and had to sell our rv for dirt cheap. The point of the rv living was to lower our cost of living and be closer to nature while we got our lives together. The beautiful thing is, we accomplished just that.

It started with my grandfather dying. The man that literally raised me. As i was moving into the rv i was taken off guard by hearing the news that my grandfather was on his deathbed. So the night that we moved out of the apartment, i took a plane ride to indiana from colorado to attent the most emotional funeral ive ever been to in my life. This man was a symbol to me. Along with my grandmother. They taught me to work on vehicles, they thrived in their marriage for 40 years and were the only ones who condoned my relationship with my girlfriend when everyone else was against us. All without judgement or predjudice. They were wealthy with not only their finances, but with their generosity and wisdom as well. They showed me how i could learn to function in the world and how much im truly worth and where i had potential.

This changed me. I denied my grandfathers death for a short time. But something was different. It made me want to change myself. And the realization came when i realized i hadnt done anything to truly change myself for so long. Anytime i try to do something i just put it back down and complain. Im a fucking mellenial. I see it all around me. Thats why i decided to move to colorado, right? To get away from the people who stagnate in my life and bring about procrastination.

IM DONE! AND IM READY!! Im ready for my own change. Not the change obama brought. But REAL CHANGE. CHANGE IN THE INDIVIDUAL! Change in our lives that means something. We fear change so much that we shut down in the face of it. We must learn to embrace change so we are not caught off guard.

We need to take our lives into our own hands and mold ourselves. If you have the competence and the ability to see that your room is cluttered and that if you cleaned it you could focus on other things, then you should be capable of seeing faults in yourself that you could work on. But what keeps us from expressing ourselves is the fear of criticism. When your told at work that your not doing well and your constantly being shown that you are not doing correct, the same emotions relate in our brain to make us feel like prey to a predator. We become vunerable by being shown our faults. And its not a pretty picture to be told that your wrong. It doesnt feel good. But when we have the confidence to stand up and realize our faults and face them head on we slay metaphorical dragons. We fight ideas rather than monsters. But arent you prey to your thoughts?

Communication gives us the ability to relate these experiences to other individuals. We are a species and we can communicate through multiple means. We also have the ability to empathise and inspire. And without communication, we couldnt do any of this. We couldnt share the great experiences we have learned to eager young ears that dream of adventure. We are so desensitized that anything we say or do is potentially putting us at risk. My question to you is, do the benifets of learning through others justify the risk we might get by "offending" somebody that doesnt agree with you? I say it is no question. It is built into our dna to feel important. You can call it ego, you can call it charisma, you can call it hope, maybe even faith. But we strive on knowing that we do good. And when you can give the gift of understanding and communication to another human being you not only help the individual, you help yourself as well. You must be willing to put your emotions aside and pay close attention. Because that person may know more than what they are telling you. They may not even know it at that moment. But the truth is stranger than fiction. And we must always seek truth.

If you took the time to read this post i thank you. I thank you because i know you care. You are here for a reason. You just need to find that reason and fight for it for the rest of your life. Because what else do we have to live for than to express our true selves. No matter what you believe. We are all human. We need to learn to start thinking like humans and not as barbaric or nihilistic animals. We have the unique ability to change our environment by changing internally and envisioning what we could become. Its time.