I think people are very self-involved, whether consciously or sub-consciously, and they do not look outside themselves to really involve themselves with others, even if those others have been kind or not.

People are in a constant state of survival. It makes it fairly hard to look outside of your own self to tend to the emotional needs of others. For those that DO look beyond themselves and do the nasty things, it's the survival technique of narcissists, which are a nefarious breed of human being that is ever increasing. In the case of narcissists, you will NEVER (no matter how hard you try) be able to please them unless you are suffering.