Hi OP

Reading this I do see 'our' point in 'doing' this to understand more.
So I met this thread to clarify my own understanding of reality and I am doing a great job at that ;)

As background I can tell that trauma, abuse and pain brought me very fast to understanding and waking up, it was a great propeller.
I am learning to love this as I know that it accelerates transition into new perspective and perceptions of my reality.

Now lets get to some detail that I would like your perspective on:
The Void - why so scared of it:? During satori I sensed it as a blissfull empty quiet place detached from the 'perception' like a womb for it , a screen for the movie.
I know I am this void and I long for it, kinda makes me in love with death but kinda living anyway for the kicks of it if you know what I mean.