Abuse, seeing too much harm. Not being able to stop certain things. Ive had it all my life. Isolation. Fight or flight. Always picking the wrong action (fight or flight). There are times when I invison myself getting up and attacking people because they are doing something that causes me to feel like I can't escape them or the pressure. Feeling trapped. Being alone is better, Nobody gets hurt but me that way. There is no pharmaceutical that helps it. Weed is a good escape but not a cure by any means. Having a dog would be nice. Maybe some day.