Star Wars Episode 9: Rey is Leia/Lando's lovechild!!

On everybody's nose the whole time:

Rey is Jedi like Leia and a street hustler, scavenger, smuggler and knew how to pilot the MF right off the bat, just like Lando.

Han is a cuck!!

Rey is Leia/Lando's kid.

Kylo Ren is Leia/Chewie's kid.

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There's a reason they called him Han "Solo".

Rey is Leia/Luke's incest love child. Emperor Palpatine foresaw it. That's why he's back in Episode IX.

It's fantasy and you don't have to watch it. I'm not!

The world keeps turning even without Star Whores.

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Disney is beating that dead horse into the second death...

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This franchise is going to come to the biggest implosion in film history.

I didn't think anything could get worse than the prequels. Man, was I wrong.

Every Generation has a Legend...

But Rey isn't it...

I'm half tempted to watch it just to laugh at how bad it is. The movie should break all kinds of records. Cause 10% of the fan base wants to watch it because they think it's good (eye roll) and the other 90% are like me.

Sorry. I couldn't resist.

May the 4th be with you. This is the end.

o lord no.

The SJWs are easily startled but they'll soon be back and in greater numbers...

Don't underestimate SJWs in large groups and their stranglehold on multinational corporations.

I hope the Emperor comes back and slowly and sadistically kills all the new characters.

Um. It’s Chewy and Lando kid. Chewy is a Tranny with female organs

I officially hate star wars now. I hate Luke, han, Liea, that dog guy, that emo guy, Darth, Ben, Yoda, the Emporer, all of em. And I even hate my own childhood, now.

Thanks for ruining my life, Disney. I hate you too.

Last Edited by anastasis888 on 04/15/2019 01:31 AM

Good call. We starting cheering for the Empire to take out the SJW rebel scum.

I hope the Emperor kills everybody and ends up taking over the empire while laughing manically and it fades to black to roll credits.

I'd pay to watch that. Go Palpatine!

And now we can see the beef the Empire has with the rebels. Bunch of SJWs scum

Maybe I shouldn't mention this in a Star Wars thread but the SJW's have destroyed Star Trek too.. I'm a fan of both franchises. That said if no one minds... let's come together and have a moment of silence for two formerly great franchises...

I just want to see Darth Vader taking off heads the whole movie. If the emperor can come back, why can't Darth Vader?

That would be a great ending. Maybe Palpatine was the good guy after all and the empire was fighting a bunch of sjw pussies.

Fuck star trek discovery btw. I love both wars and trek but they are ruined now.

Yep. Those rebels... reminds me of muslims.

Last Edited by AltSwede on 04/15/2019 01:38 AM

So time travel? Let's make a good use of it and wipe out the last jedi lol

Eh, I'm just kidding. I know good and well I'll never see this film. I couldn't even make it through 20 minutes of the Force Returns ep 7, or whatever it was before I fell asleep on the couch, I totally forgot that the Least Jedi was even made, and the Skywalker person ep IX is ...

It's just all retarded. Why can't they just release this on DVD so it can be over? They're going to promote this thing till Christmas, then we'll have all these stupid commercials for stupid Rey action figures, and that black guy, and the Marilyn Manson emo dude.

Hopefully the EMP will detonate before this is released.

Last Edited by anastasis888 on 04/15/2019 02:22 AM