Hospice patient. Real Time. Real World. UPDATE: Noslot Gained His Wings Last Night. pg 11

This thread kinda made me sad.

good luck OP


cya on the other side

I apologise op wasn't trying to be an ass.
I have no hard feelings towards hospice workers...it's just everyone I know who went thru hospice died within a week or two.
I guess there's a chance...even if only 1 out of 5.

Oops. Sorry OP as I had meant to post respects...

Old age donchano...

Respects and in my missive are you...

Thats a reasonable question and the answer is I don't know. Ask me this moment and that seems the furthest thing that could possibly happen. When I have "bad" days the horizon line gets a bit closer. I guess I can only say that I am a heck of a lot closer now than I was last year or yesterday perhaps.

OP, thank you for reporting from Near The Other Side. Most people in Hospice probably don't do the internet, or forums, so your witness here is most interesting, and rare, save in a hospice forum.

When you want, read the most famous of nurse ghost threads here,
[link to allnurses.com (secure)]
as I do most Octobers to get all ready for the souls coming to visit the day after Halloween.

Seriously, this thread has so much near-transition spirituality of visitations to patients in it that nurses witness, not hallucinations, but speaking to those on the other side who are preparing them to come Home. It really affected and strengthened my spirituality just reading this thing. Last checked, I was at page 114 a few years ago. It is riveting!

Again, thank you for being here.

OP, if you need support.........keep coming back. I'll be sure to find your posts and add my two cents from my experience in Hospice. I don't want to derail or focus on myself right now. I'm still not out of woods and am still having difficulty. Now I am arranging my own healthcare and I feel really lost right now. I'm hoping to get palliative care in the interim. Stay strong and I sure do hope to see you around. You sound very positive and that is so encouraging! My thoughts are with you.

As my old ma were wont to say...

Those holy souls about us are more numerous than the blades of grass we trod on daily. We should hope for a heaven of sorts. Purgatory of course is the place to end up...

The other place. ...

I hesitated to respond. First, thank you for mentioning hospice nursing. Next to family my nurse is the most intimate human being in my life. She will see my nakedness, my bathroom habits, my tears, my laughter, my sarcasm, our family dynamics… everything there is to know about me/us. Why? Because she is safe. She accepts me just the way I am. I don’t have to be anything but who I am in those moments. She “loves” me in spite of me.

I fired my first hospice nurse because she wasn’t the person I wanted to accompany me on this journey. I gave her several weeks before I finally told my wife I needed to make a change. I called the hospice org and informed them I wanted a different nurse. To my great surprise the case managers voice was warm and encouraging. She said that this happens frequently and that everyone understands how important that question is, “Is it safe?” The answer must be yes.

OK all you psych folks can say I have transference issues! :)

when your toes start turning blue and black and it moves up your calf, you are hours away or one night maybe. they will peek at your feet regular to gauge the hours. You will be told all is fine. and it is. you are dying.

Quite true actually. You seem to be enamored by the macabre. Thats simply the body responding to its death. The real story is the one unfolding in your soul and IMHO known but to God.

I am speaking from the care giver position and having brought comfort to many in hospice over the years. that is all. have a good journey.

And back at ya!

Thats the trouble with forums. You can't see facial expressions or hear tone inflection to put remarks in their proper context. I apologize for my sarcasm responding to you.

Caregivers are the unsung heroes. My wife is my hero.

itz all good. do not sweat a thing.

I am sending your wife a heart full of love and care. She is lovely to do this for you. Give her a hug and some kindest words you can find. Sad now. I will drop in time to time.

Last Edited by rewind on 08/14/2019 06:51 PM

Thank you for allowing us to be a minuscule part of your final journey. I wish you well,and look forward to your post for a long time to come. Sending you a bear hug.

Last Edited by Gray Man on 08/14/2019 07:04 PM

Get a KJV Bible red letter version and read the first 4 chapters of the New Testament. Just read the red letter stuff if nothing else. You will be reading the words of Jesus.

Not speaking for him but death does really piss some people off...

Even though it does happen to us all there is an element of it that seems crazily unfair...

This isn’t going to become “Dear Diary” because I hate “look at me” crap. So I’m not going to post stuff about day to day living and I’ve probably said too much already.

So having said that I will immediately say more! LOLL You may find this interesting. A typical nurse visit for me begins with fresh coffee for all. Then she will always begin by asking how are you doing today. I usually say something like my disease is progressing nicely or some other silly thing. After the obligatory laugh, we begin to process things in earnest and exchange accurate information.

She then does vitals, listens to my lungs and chest and measures my BMI by measuring the diameter of my left bicep. A quick med check for refills and then the focus turns to my wife and we listen. As far as I’m concerned she is the most important person in the room and hospice provides great aftercare services including support groups for caregivers and grief counseling. Grief counseling begins immediately as grief seems to be the shadow of death.

Finally please ask questions. I’ll share my truth or I won’t say anything because I’ll never lie about this. Not because it misleads you, but because I don’t like me very much when I do.

When you crossover the rainbow bridge, will you come into my dream tell me all about the secret of after life

Of course you're right. I was just trying to invite a bit of conversation for both of our sakes. As I'm sure you know Kubler Ross talks about anger, etc. I haven't yet experienced personal anger about my situation. (Yet perhaps being the operative word.)

I think this is probably because I’m older (76yo) and have lived a good life unlike the young who experience the great theft death visits on their lives. This reinforces my deep gratitude for my life that I truly didn’t “deserve”.

When they swab your mouth with little blue sponges on a stick soaked in water to keep your mouth hydrated, it doesn’t have to be water, try apple juice, flat soda, whatever you desire.

I wish you a most wonderful and peaceful transition.

Perhaps, before you slip between Worlds you’ll let us know if you see passed Loved Ones.

You speak with such respect and love for your wife. Thank you for sharing that here, a place that often undermines the value of the connection a marriage can bring.

Have you made an agreement about ways you may contact her and communicate after your disembodiment?

I've found animal symbols, birds for example have assisted in my communication with my loved ones after they have passed. I've also found communication through music, songs carry messages from my departed loved ones.

Is this too spiritual for what you are looking for?

I respect your time as precious and your energy should focus on what you want.

I'm not sure how much I can contribute...but I'll try.

I took care of my mom in her home while she was dying...took her to all the chemo & dr. appointments for 9 months.

There came a point where the hospital could do a better job of managing her pain...it was 8 days in the hospital and 8 days in hospice and then she was gone.

It took a heavy toll on me...but spending the last 9 months of her life with her was great & I don't regret a minute of it!

I mostly let my mom control the conversations...I would not bring up death or what lies beyond...but if she brought it up I was happy to discuss it...So I will try to treat this thread in the same way.

Thank you.



It is a sad commentary when this occurs and it's its own reward.



I've heard our local caregivers say that exact thing. What a gift they provide us. They're saying to us that we matter. That our lives are important to them. That we will be missed. They are loving us as only they can and a man or woman is truly blessed to be held in such regard.

Oh wow, you are such a fucking asshole. What broke inside of you and turn you into a social path?

Have a fantastic journey OP when ever that may be.

I remember my mom was perplexed at the thought of a world without her.

She didn't have a "big head"...she just couldn't fathom the idea of it. The idea seemed so foreign to her.

my mother is passing pissed off about it but she was always upset and mad about something so that is how she is about dying.

THATS JUST THE WRONG Q..

SIDE/TANGENT QUESTION OP: DO YOU FEEL KINDA 'ZEN' ISH NOW?..OR ON SOME DAYS?..I ASSUME THAT EGO DEATH AND THE JOSEPH CAMPBELL AND
THOSE WEDNESDAYS WITH MORRIE..MORRY..?..MUST BE OF SOME HELP...RAYMOND MOODY AND ELIZ. KUBLER ROSS STUFF...ALSO,
I KNO MOST FOLKS DONT WANT TO BE ALL OPIUM PACKED...BUT, WHAT ABOUT LSD-25 ON THE WAY OUT...TO 'KICK' OVER A CHAIR AND WIN A NOBEL PRIZE?!...ANSWER IF YOU CARE TO..BLESS U!