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How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 14931885
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11/08/2019 10:49 AM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Has it ever occurred to you that brilliant people speak to all kinds of people with all kinds of ideas to increase their fund of knowledge?

You can entertain ideas without accepting them.

You make so much money that you cannot afford to be kind to two people who have sacrificed two years of their lives to simply make the world a better place?

Shame on you.

Invite them in. Offer them some water.

Be polite. Be kind. Their religion teaches service and sacrifice. Their systems are effective and efficient.

You may learn something.

Life is too short not to be kind.
Annie Oakley

User ID: 75708546
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11/08/2019 11:02 AM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Pull out your garden hose and offer them a lawn baptism.
Clon

User ID: 78149998
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11/08/2019 11:17 AM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Tell them Joseph Smith married 40 women. Some of them were married to men he had sent on missions.
Clon
Clon

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11/08/2019 11:17 AM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Tell them Joseph Smith married 40 women. Some of them were married to men he had sent on missions.

One of them was 14 years old.

Last Edited by Clon on 11/08/2019 11:26 AM
Clon
Anonymous Coward
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11/08/2019 11:30 AM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Any ideas how to keep these IDIOTS away??

FUCK YOUR CULT
 Quoting: Butch DeFeo


Are you confusing Mormons with Jehova Witnesses? I have never had a Mormon come to my house, but have gotten plenty of Jehova Witnesses.
Florida Stevii
User ID: 76792171
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11/08/2019 11:37 AM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Any ideas how to keep these IDIOTS away??

FUCK YOUR CULT
 Quoting: Butch DeFeo


Tell them ya just drew a bath and if they would like to come in and join ya in the bath you will be happy to discuss anything they would like....
Florida Stevii
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11/08/2019 11:37 AM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Any ideas how to keep these IDIOTS away??

FUCK YOUR CULT
 Quoting: Butch DeFeo


Tell them ya just drew a bath and if they would like to come in and join ya in the bath you will be happy to discuss anything they would like....
Anonymous Coward
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11/08/2019 11:42 AM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Join the church.....then they will stop coming.....
Clon

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11/08/2019 11:58 AM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Join the church.....then they will stop coming.....
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77312532


If you join you will be going out to other members
houses, or they will show up at your house at least once a month.
Clon
The_Meridian
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11/08/2019 11:59 AM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Any ideas how to keep these IDIOTS away??

FUCK YOUR CULT
 Quoting: Butch DeFeo


So much anger/hate/rage

Maybe you should invite them in one day? You need them.
"Belief is the enemy of knowing." -Crrow777

"Follow your heart, your intuition...it will lead you in the right direction." -Jewel Kitcher
HO LEE FUKK

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11/08/2019 12:14 PM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
rackit
WARNING SHIT TALK IN MY THREAD GET OFF TOPIC IM GOING TO BAN YOU FUKK RIGHT OFF ......
Butch DeFeo  (OP)

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11/08/2019 12:29 PM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Thanks for all the great replies! I'm not sure which idea I want to implement!
Butch DeFeo  (OP)

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11/08/2019 12:30 PM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Any ideas how to keep these IDIOTS away??

FUCK YOUR CULT
 Quoting: Butch DeFeo


Get a friend to come out and let them know you have died.

Years ago my flatmate was getting harassed by them so that's what we told them. Worked a charm!
 Quoting: Cleolotus


To clarify, I'm sure they are canvassing houses randomly - they are not targeting me specifically.
Butch DeFeo  (OP)

User ID: 78147338
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11/08/2019 12:31 PM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
as an ex mormon priest?

tell them "the last two that came by said they 'dusted their feet' "....


they will know what it means, and not bother you anymore.. ;)
 Quoting: CitizenPerth


THIS is interesting.
If you revisit this thread, please tell us more about what this means. And I wonder if a second or third party of mormons would want to "give you a second chance", even if you say that.
Butch DeFeo  (OP)

User ID: 78147338
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11/08/2019 12:34 PM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Ask them about the Mountain Meadows Massacre? Why did they dress up as Indians and slaughter a wagon train of fellow Americans?

Tell them you want some got dam answers on that one?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19251511


Oh wow, I know a song about this exact thing:

song is at:
[link to generationdecline.bandcamp.com (secure)]

lyrics:

SEPTEMBER 11TH 1857, IS A DAY IN HISTORY THAT MUST NEVER BE FORGOTTEN
SEPTEMBER 11TH 1857, THE MOUNTAIN MEADOWS MASSACRE CARRIED OUT BY BRIGHAM YOUNG'S MEN

THEY PREYED ON THE TRAVELERS, THEY PREYED ON THE TIRED
MEN, WOMEN AND CHILDREN, NONE OF THEM WERE SPARED
THEY ATTACKED THE ARKANSAS IMMIGRANTS, BLOOD SPILLED IN THE UTAH TERRITORY AND THE ONLY
FUCKER TO BLAME WAS THAT BASTARD JOHN D. LEE

HISTORY SWEPT UNDER THE RUG!
FOLLOWING ORDERS FROM ABOVE!

MORE SHOULD'VE BEEN TRIED, MORE SHOULD'VE BEEN CONVICTED
THE FUCKING MORMON MILITIA GOT OFF WITH A SLAP ON THE WRIST
MORE SHOULD'VE BEEN TRIED, MORE SHOULD'VE BEEN CONVICTED
THE FUCKING MORMON MILITIA GOT OFF WITH A SLAP ON THE WRIST

ANOTHER CASE OF RELIGIOUS FANATICISM AT ITS BEST
YOUNG WAS BLIND WITH POWER AND HE DIDN'T EVEN BREAK A SWEAT
WHAT DOES THE DEATH TOLL HAVE TO RISE TO
TO REALIZE THIS RELIGION IS A CULT HIDING HISTORY FROM THEIR OWN
USING UTAH AS THEIR SAFE HOME

HISTORY SWEPT UNDER THE RUG!
FOLLOWING ORDERS FROM ABOVE!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 77524817
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11/08/2019 12:37 PM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
This last summer was my turn for the missionary’s. They come every week now. I am usually out at the time and hubby says they look mighty disappointed when told I’m not home.

They are young 18 year old men, on their first trip away from home, doing missionary work. It is very sweet. They offer to rake leaves, paint my walls, etc. hubby always says no thanks.

I like to talk to them. I recited the Lord’s Prayer the other day. They don’t recite prayers. I told them that that is a mistake. God wants to hear our prayers and when we congregate and say the Lord’s Prayer, it has great power. They disagreed and said incantations are against their religion.

I have tried to read their Book of Mormon, but it seems like it is just the Old Testament with the names changed.

Hubby says I am leading them on, that I have to tell them I will never join their church. But I kinda like talking to them, teaching them my experiences with having Jesus in my life. But they are extremely determined to get me in their church, I think they have quotas to meet, and that is sad. I don’t like it when churches or people manipulate youngsters.
Butch DeFeo  (OP)

User ID: 78147338
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11/08/2019 12:41 PM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
This last summer was my turn for the missionary’s. They come every week now. I am usually out at the time and hubby says they look mighty disappointed when told I’m not home.

They are young 18 year old men, on their first trip away from home, doing missionary work. It is very sweet. They offer to rake leaves, paint my walls, etc. hubby always says no thanks.

I like to talk to them. I recited the Lord’s Prayer the other day. They don’t recite prayers. I told them that that is a mistake. God wants to hear our prayers and when we congregate and say the Lord’s Prayer, it has great power. They disagreed and said incantations are against their religion.

I have tried to read their Book of Mormon, but it seems like it is just the Old Testament with the names changed.

Hubby says I am leading them on, that I have to tell them I will never join their church. But I kinda like talking to them, teaching them my experiences with having Jesus in my life. But they are extremely determined to get me in their church, I think they have quotas to meet, and that is sad. I don’t like it when churches or people manipulate youngsters.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77524817


Yeah, one seemingly good thing about the mormons is that they are trained by their cult to act very KIND. And that may be fake, but it is good behavior to see.
It's funny that you like them to visit.
Butch DeFeo  (OP)

User ID: 78147338
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11/08/2019 12:42 PM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
I'm gonna order this sign and put it up and see if it works:

[link to www.amazon.com (secure)]


Again, thanks for all replies.
Gotta run some errors - BRB.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 77116830
United States
11/08/2019 12:47 PM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Move to Texas, never had a religious door knocker ever. 43 years.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 73188307
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11/08/2019 12:52 PM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
I just tell them i have my own religion.
They came once, never came back.
You can also say “My Jesus doesnt have a brother named Satan”.
dodger007

User ID: 77690112
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11/08/2019 12:59 PM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Any ideas how to keep these IDIOTS away??

FUCK YOUR CULT
 Quoting: Butch DeFeo


Get a friend to come out and let them know you have died.

Years ago my flatmate was getting harassed by them so that's what we told them. Worked a charm!
 Quoting: Cleolotus


Except they probably went and baptized your “ dead” friend
Surprise - he’s now a mormon
dodger007
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 77524817
United States
11/08/2019 01:25 PM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
This last summer was my turn for the missionary’s. They come every week now. I am usually out at the time and hubby says they look mighty disappointed when told I’m not home.

They are young 18 year old men, on their first trip away from home, doing missionary work. It is very sweet. They offer to rake leaves, paint my walls, etc. hubby always says no thanks.

I like to talk to them. I recited the Lord’s Prayer the other day. They don’t recite prayers. I told them that that is a mistake. God wants to hear our prayers and when we congregate and say the Lord’s Prayer, it has great power. They disagreed and said incantations are against their religion.

I have tried to read their Book of Mormon, but it seems like it is just the Old Testament with the names changed.

Hubby says I am leading them on, that I have to tell them I will never join their church. But I kinda like talking to them, teaching them my experiences with having Jesus in my life. But they are extremely determined to get me in their church, I think they have quotas to meet, and that is sad. I don’t like it when churches or people manipulate youngsters.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77524817


Yeah, one seemingly good thing about the mormons is that they are trained by their cult to act very KIND. And that may be fake, but it is good behavior to see.
It's funny that you like them to visit.
 Quoting: Butch DeFeo


I am very entertaining. Have traveled the world, seen and done it all... well not all. Hehe. I would never take advantage of morman virgins that come to my door..
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 4718164
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11/08/2019 01:29 PM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Just be glad you were not born a Mormon, and used as a sacrifice and eternal torture victim.

Run away, very fast from the Mormons.
The_Meridian
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11/08/2019 01:35 PM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Any ideas how to keep these IDIOTS away??

FUCK YOUR CULT
 Quoting: Butch DeFeo


Get a friend to come out and let them know you have died.

Years ago my flatmate was getting harassed by them so that's what we told them. Worked a charm!
 Quoting: Cleolotus


Except they probably went and baptized your “ dead” friend
Surprise - he’s now a mormon
 Quoting: dodger007


A departed spirit must accept the baptism performed on their behalf according to Mormon theology. Your statement is ignorant.
"Belief is the enemy of knowing." -Crrow777

"Follow your heart, your intuition...it will lead you in the right direction." -Jewel Kitcher
Anonymous Coward
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11/08/2019 01:37 PM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
I lived in Utah for a couple of years. They knew I wasn't a Mormon and I would have the same two guys knock on my door every other Saturday for the first month I lived there. I would open the door and politely tell them I was happy with my own faith.

But, I got tired of it. So, the next Saturday they came (I could see them walking up the street), I went to the door in my bathrobe, messed up my hair a little, had a glass in my hand with booze in it and was smoking a cigarette.

Mind you these were 19 year old kids.

Opening the door, I said, "Hey guys, you wanna come in and have a drink? You can make yourself comfortable there are some smokes on the table. I'll be a few minutes because I'm banging this bitch, but as soon as I'm done, I'll be out."

They stammered something about they can't be around so much sin, and left - to never return again. I guess I was written off as a lost soul.
Anonymous Coward
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11/08/2019 01:44 PM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Easiest and most effective way is look up your local ward/church and write a letter just asking that no missionaries visit your home.
The_Meridian
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11/08/2019 01:44 PM

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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
They stammered something about they can't be around so much sin, and left - to never return again. I guess I was written off as a lost soul.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77457813


More like you wrote yourself off. Why not take some personal responsibility?

That said, I'm 100% certain they would return if you reached out.

These are your decisions, not theirs.
"Belief is the enemy of knowing." -Crrow777

"Follow your heart, your intuition...it will lead you in the right direction." -Jewel Kitcher
Anonymous Coward
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11/08/2019 01:45 PM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Get a pair of underwear, punch a bunch of holes in it and hang it on you doorknob. That way they'll know you're one of them.
Anonymous Coward
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11/08/2019 01:52 PM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Get a pair of underwear, punch a bunch of holes in it and hang it on you doorknob. That way they'll know you're one of them.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 78126517


Father give fist for bad boy
-a
User ID: 78081005
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11/08/2019 02:01 PM
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Re: How do you get mormons (morons) to stop walkng up to your house and knocking on the door?
Next time they come tell them the Angel Moroni forbids them from entering you’re property and you have a contract of no communication with him. They will not return.





GLP