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People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that

 
Anonymous Coward
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11/30/2019 08:47 AM
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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
There's some irony in complaining about your family's resident narcissist while in the throes of telling us ALL you've been targeted for destruction.

You may already be your mother.
MissCleo

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11/30/2019 08:47 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
oh gurl.

Narcissists (NPD) are dangerous.

They are not capable of empathy. They do target others to suck the life out of them because they are vampires.

Narcissists will employ and surround themselves with "flying monkeys" to help them target certain individuals. These flying monkeys buy into the narcissists lies and deceptions and wait for the promised (empty) rewards that the narcissist promises.

In some cases when Narcissists don't get their way they will revert to murder.
 Quoting: MissCleo


They are extremely dangerous on the wrong end of the spectrum. I had one of those in my life. I wonder if that's the abuse you are always picking up with me. I'm glad you posted here.
 Quoting: chasity


Probably.

xoxoxo
MissCleo

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11/30/2019 08:48 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
There's some irony in complaining about your family's resident narcissist while in the throes of telling us ALL you've been targeted for destruction.

You may already be your mother.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75394167


stfu gaslighter
LittleMe
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11/30/2019 08:49 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
so if the narcissist is targeting you and you come on a public form and target the narcissist ...
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77141761


lol, my mom wouldn't believe it if she was diagnosed with it.
 Quoting: chasity


exactly, they think nothing is wrong with them, no convincing them.
 Quoting: MissCleo


And the sad part is that some people go along with them...
angel2lmmerrychristmasangel2

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Santa cutie, been an awful good girl!
chasity  (OP)
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11/30/2019 08:50 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Anyone can look like a Model with a filter.

Its only when you are actually outside in the real world that you see them for who they really are.

Youd think seeing all these images of people online that they are so beautiful and attractive, but the majority of people who have posted pictures or videos online have doctored them to a degree, often heavily. Just take snapchat for example, you can use a really basic filter without any of that flamboyant crap, and it can remove all wrinkles on your face any blemishes etc..

Not to mention the other effects you can use to doctor such images or videos.

We are gradually moving into a world in which people simply Live in an artificial reality/world. Where the only thing that matters in a profile pic.

You would be shocked to see some of these people in real life and how different they look compared to what you were originally shown.

Tread carefully this world is not what it seems. And the majority of Humans are falling for the Trap of deception and lies.
 Quoting: Archaic Smile


They have an image to uphold, they want people to see them in a particular way. They use physical things like their home decorations and their photos to portray something they believe will lure people in.
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
chasity  (OP)
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11/30/2019 08:53 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
so if the narcissist is targeting you and you come on a public form and target the narcissist ...
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77141761


lol, my mom wouldn't believe it if she was diagnosed with it.
 Quoting: chasity


exactly, they think nothing is wrong with them, no convincing them.
 Quoting: MissCleo


I heard therapists can see this right away but it takes years of therapy before they can tell the person this is what they are, most times they don't. Even therapists know it's very difficult to tell these people they have a personality defect.
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
LittleMe
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11/30/2019 08:54 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Well, I see it this way, they only can give what they have, plain and simple.

A miserable person who hates his own life will hate others too and want them to be miserable like them.
angel2lmmerrychristmasangel2

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Santa cutie, been an awful good girl!
chasity  (OP)
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11/30/2019 08:55 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
so if the narcissist is targeting you and you come on a public form and target the narcissist ...
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77141761


lol, my mom wouldn't believe it if she was diagnosed with it.
 Quoting: chasity


exactly, they think nothing is wrong with them, no convincing them.
 Quoting: MissCleo


And the sad part is that some people go along with them...
 Quoting: LittleMe


I actually feel bad for hating my sister all these years for going along with my mom. She was just trying to please her like how I was trying to please my dad. But she had both to please, at least I only had my dad, half the load and I wasn't financially dependent on either of them she was. I feel bad for making fun of her for being overweight and having a stroke before she turned 50. She was the favorite and got the worst of it. She finally cut my dad out but she still is hanging onto my mom, she's really hard to shake loose. And of course my mom and dad saw nothing wrong with my sister and I not having a relationship. This is what my mom wanted, no relationships for me, then she went to work on breaking my sisters life into pieces.

Last Edited by chasity on 11/30/2019 09:02 AM
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
Archaic Smile

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11/30/2019 08:56 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Anyone can look like a Model with a filter.

Its only when you are actually outside in the real world that you see them for who they really are.

Youd think seeing all these images of people online that they are so beautiful and attractive, but the majority of people who have posted pictures or videos online have doctored them to a degree, often heavily. Just take snapchat for example, you can use a really basic filter without any of that flamboyant crap, and it can remove all wrinkles on your face any blemishes etc..

Not to mention the other effects you can use to doctor such images or videos.

We are gradually moving into a world in which people simply Live in an artificial reality/world. Where the only thing that matters in a profile pic.

You would be shocked to see some of these people in real life and how different they look compared to what you were originally shown.

Tread carefully this world is not what it seems. And the majority of Humans are falling for the Trap of deception and lies.
 Quoting: Archaic Smile


They have an image to uphold, they want people to see them in a particular way. They use physical things like their home decorations and their photos to portray something they believe will lure people in.
 Quoting: chasity


People seem to do this without even being aware fully of what they are doing to themselves and others.

Manipulating themselves, their environment, and the other person or peoples they wish to seduce/harm.

The society we live in promotes it heavily, and does very little to combat the wickedness. You have to really over step your bounds to get in trouble these days for immoral acts.
And at another time, when they raised a question about fortifications, he said that a city is not unfortified whose crowning glory is men and not bricks and stones.
-Plutarch, Moralia
chasity  (OP)
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11/30/2019 08:59 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
People seem to do this without even being aware fully of what they are doing to themselves and others.

Manipulating themselves, their environment, and the other person or peoples they wish to seduce/harm.

The society we live in promotes it heavily, and does very little to combat the wickedness. You have to really over step your bounds to get in trouble these days for immoral acts.
 Quoting: Archaic Smile


They lack awareness and are unable to look within themselves. They are all surface, there is absolutely no depth with them. I think that's why it's easy to see this online with some people, conversations lack sincerity, in retrospection. Anyone can say god bless you or I'm praying for you, in fact this is very common for those types of people.

Last Edited by chasity on 11/30/2019 09:00 AM
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
XeroGravity
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11/30/2019 09:10 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
The instant I determine a person is a liar I put distance between myself & them. Habitual liars tend to be the very same people who blame their troubles on anything & everything except themselves. If a person refuses to take responsibility for their failings or shortcomings, they'll never expend the effort to correct them. Very self-defeating attitude.

When you let people like that in your life, they ALWAYS stick the knife in your back - sometimes because it benefits them, other times because they simply enjoy tearing other people down. And if you adopt an aggressive philosophy of constant self-improvement & strive to better yourself, haters & parasites are drawn to you. That includes friends & family especially.

My 2 cents.
There's no such thing as gravity. The Earth just sucks.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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11/30/2019 09:17 AM
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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
The instant I determine a person is a liar I put distance between myself & them. Habitual liars tend to be the very same people who blame their troubles on anything & everything except themselves. If a person refuses to take responsibility for their failings or shortcomings, they'll never expend the effort to correct them. Very self-defeating attitude.

When you let people like that in your life, they ALWAYS stick the knife in your back - sometimes because it benefits them, other times because they simply enjoy tearing other people down. And if you adopt an aggressive philosophy of constant self-improvement & strive to better yourself, haters & parasites are drawn to you. That includes friends & family especially.

My 2 cents.
 Quoting: XeroGravity


I think in my case my mom started out as gossiping about me. I've heard from numerous people the things she has said and they came to me actually feeling sorry for me and it was my mom looking for sympathy. Then it turned into blaming me for her divorcing my dad lol.

They are just all over the place. The end product is always the same.

I learned early never to listen or take advice from people that blame others. Not only do they lie to you, they lie to themselves. I like people that can use their life mistakes as examples to becoming better, those people can be trusted.
Anonymous Coward
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11/30/2019 09:31 AM
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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
My sister was married to a sociopathic narcissist for 10 years. For 6 years after the divorce, his entire life goal was to ruin her as best he could. CPS reports, refusal to pay child support, literally quit his job when she started having his paycheck garnished, moved to another state when the legality of it all was getting tough...he manipulated the kids and had them hating her for a while due to a bunch of lies. He's a total psycho. There was so much he did that was so crazy that my sister's lawyer didn't even believe it was that bad until she saw evidence. She said it was the worst case of emotional abuse she had ever seen by far. His own lawyer fired him because he was so psycho! Just last month he told their oldest he wanted nothing to do with her because she chose the evil mom over him. Ugh
 Quoting: Only Me


You’re supposed to just kill assholes like that
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 78144174


This.

.
beenthruthat

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11/30/2019 10:04 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Are women targeted more than men by narcissists?
 Quoting: chasity


No , Honey ... but certain personality types are for instance a INFJ or a INFP ... You can go to 16 personalities . com if You don't know Your type ...
LittleMe
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11/30/2019 10:11 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
...


lol, my mom wouldn't believe it if she was diagnosed with it.
 Quoting: chasity


exactly, they think nothing is wrong with them, no convincing them.
 Quoting: MissCleo


And the sad part is that some people go along with them...
 Quoting: LittleMe


I actually feel bad for hating my sister all these years for going along with my mom. She was just trying to please her like how I was trying to please my dad. But she had both to please, at least I only had my dad, half the load and I wasn't financially dependent on either of them she was. I feel bad for making fun of her for being overweight and having a stroke before she turned 50. She was the favorite and got the worst of it. She finally cut my dad out but she still is hanging onto my mom, she's really hard to shake loose. And of course my mom and dad saw nothing wrong with my sister and I not having a relationship. This is what my mom wanted, no relationships for me, then she went to work on breaking my sisters life into pieces.
 Quoting: chasity


I would never understand why some people want others have a miserable life, I just can’t!

A mother is supposed to keep all her children together and not make them apart from each other. A real loving mother doesn’t make their children’s lives miserable. I’m so sorry my dear love about your mother... years ago my awesome therapist made me write down my mother’s neglects and also write down what I do for my own children, and made me compare, she said to me be happy cuz you’re not your mother and you love your children and you would die for them not like your selfish mother... I can see you’re not like your mother, my sweetheart. And I think having those type of psycho mothers helped us to be who we are and how we raised and love our beautiful children.

I have five boys, my little brother who I raised as my own child and my husband loves and treats him like his son, and my four biological children... there’s no favoritism in my house, I love them the same. I compare them like the fingers of my hand, different fingers but I love and need them in my life.

We can’t change people lives but the good part is that we can change ours... I have learned to avoid those types and my life have changed for good ... we don’t want energy vampires in our lives!
angel2lmmerrychristmasangel2

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Santa cutie, been an awful good girl!
chasity  (OP)
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11/30/2019 11:08 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Are women targeted more than men by narcissists?
 Quoting: chasity


No , Honey ... but certain personality types are for instance a INFJ or a INFP ... You can go to 16 personalities . com if You don't know Your type ...
 Quoting: beenthruthat


I've done this test before and does our personality change with experience? I got ISFJ-A today.
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
chasity  (OP)
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11/30/2019 11:12 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I think narcissist give very strange advice too lol.
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
LittleMe
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11/30/2019 11:38 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I think narcissist give very strange advice too lol.
 Quoting: chasity


Any examples of their wisdom?
angel2lmmerrychristmasangel2

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Santa cutie, been an awful good girl!
MissCleo

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11/30/2019 11:43 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
so if the narcissist is targeting you and you come on a public form and target the narcissist ...
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77141761


lol, my mom wouldn't believe it if she was diagnosed with it.
 Quoting: chasity


exactly, they think nothing is wrong with them, no convincing them.
 Quoting: MissCleo


I heard therapists can see this right away but it takes years of therapy before they can tell the person this is what they are, most times they don't. Even therapists know it's very difficult to tell these people they have a personality defect.
 Quoting: chasity


Because NPDs are so charming and charismatic and lie, and lie more. And they are in total denial that they are doing anything wrong. It's always someone else's fault or to blame.

Ways to tell if someone is lying:
they try to convince you of something, rather than convey information.
they are vague and can't remember details.
they change the subject.
all forms of manipulation.
MissCleo

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11/30/2019 11:43 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I think narcissist give very strange advice too lol.
 Quoting: chasity


Their goal is to get their needs met.
MissCleo

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11/30/2019 11:44 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
My sister was married to a sociopathic narcissist for 10 years. For 6 years after the divorce, his entire life goal was to ruin her as best he could. CPS reports, refusal to pay child support, literally quit his job when she started having his paycheck garnished, moved to another state when the legality of it all was getting tough...he manipulated the kids and had them hating her for a while due to a bunch of lies. He's a total psycho. There was so much he did that was so crazy that my sister's lawyer didn't even believe it was that bad until she saw evidence. She said it was the worst case of emotional abuse she had ever seen by far. His own lawyer fired him because he was so psycho! Just last month he told their oldest he wanted nothing to do with her because she chose the evil mom over him. Ugh
 Quoting: Only Me


You’re supposed to just kill assholes like that
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 78144174


This.

.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76939846


This.
chasity  (OP)
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11/30/2019 11:53 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I think narcissist give very strange advice too lol.
 Quoting: chasity


Their goal is to get their needs met.
 Quoting: MissCleo


This is just so bizarre. It's even more bizarre for me to realize I the source of their needs. I could never understand why, at least I know it has a name now.
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
chasity  (OP)
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11/30/2019 12:01 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I think narcissist give very strange advice too lol.
 Quoting: chasity


Any examples of their wisdom?
 Quoting: LittleMe


lol wisdom????? there are none! It's too bizarre.

When we bought our house, the refrigerator that was here didn't work and we didn't know this until we moved in. We didn't have the money so we had to buy it on credit and we used an interest free for 18 months or so card. My dad told us the strangest advice and my husband and I can still scratch our heads to this day and not understand wtf did he mean by that? But it ended with, "that's the way the cookie crumbles" talking about how we made a mistake buying a house with a refrigerator that didn't work and we use that line as a joke when one of us is pondering something.

It always has nothing to do with what is going on but they want to come across as having something wise to say.
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
chasity  (OP)
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11/30/2019 12:27 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I've also noticed they tend to be paranoid and hold grudges, the never forgive and forget. is that pretty accurate for a narcissist to behave that way?
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
Anonymous Coward
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11/30/2019 12:40 PM
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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
My sister was married to a sociopathic narcissist for 10 years. For 6 years after the divorce, his entire life goal was to ruin her as best he could. CPS reports, refusal to pay child support, literally quit his job when she started having his paycheck garnished, moved to another state when the legality of it all was getting tough...he manipulated the kids and had them hating her for a while due to a bunch of lies. He's a total psycho. There was so much he did that was so crazy that my sister's lawyer didn't even believe it was that bad until she saw evidence. She said it was the worst case of emotional abuse she had ever seen by far. His own lawyer fired him because he was so psycho! Just last month he told their oldest he wanted nothing to do with her because she chose the evil mom over him. Ugh
 Quoting: Only Me


He sounds dangerous.
She and her children are fortunate to have survived.
Anonymous Coward
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11/30/2019 12:49 PM
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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
People seem to do this without even being aware fully of what they are doing to themselves and others.

Manipulating themselves, their environment, and the other person or peoples they wish to seduce/harm.

The society we live in promotes it heavily, and does very little to combat the wickedness. You have to really over step your bounds to get in trouble these days for immoral acts.
 Quoting: Archaic Smile


They lack awareness and are unable to look within themselves. They are all surface, there is absolutely no depth with them. I think that's why it's easy to see this online with some people, conversations lack sincerity, in retrospection. Anyone can say god bless you or I'm praying for you, in fact this is very common for those types of people.
 Quoting: chasity


I think the long shadow of WW2 and the new TV generation with new vaccines and the way of life for a period after really produced people with an inability to cope and have healthy human attachment. Maybe it was social - maybe it was culture - maybe it was environmental - I dunno.

I know there has been so much separation lately and talk about generational differences - but seriously almost all x peers of mine have very emotionally damaging/damaged parents - sometimes both, sometimes just one - raging toxic narcissists. Its like there was something in the water ~


You also have the idea that the world is a hologram filled with NPC or robotic souless entities - I don't know the answers. But it simplifies things if you just think of people as programmed like computers and some are just not capable of running certain software ~ damaged broken computers everywhere.

Sorry for your pain. Try and take care of your hearts people and let go of the things we can't solve. Peace.
LittleMe
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11/30/2019 01:25 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I think narcissist give very strange advice too lol.
 Quoting: chasity


Any examples of their wisdom?
 Quoting: LittleMe


lol wisdom????? there are none! It's too bizarre.

When we bought our house, the refrigerator that was here didn't work and we didn't know this until we moved in. We didn't have the money so we had to buy it on credit and we used an interest free for 18 months or so card. My dad told us the strangest advice and my husband and I can still scratch our heads to this day and not understand wtf did he mean by that? But it ended with, "that's the way the cookie crumbles" talking about how we made a mistake buying a house with a refrigerator that didn't work and we use that line as a joke when one of us is pondering something.

It always has nothing to do with what is going on but they want to come across as having something wise to say.
 Quoting: chasity


Yeah, it makes so much sense... it could be mammoth in the room but they will not notice it cuz they think they’re as big as a sun... poor souls!

sad
angel2lmmerrychristmasangel2

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Santa cutie, been an awful good girl!
LittleMe
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11/30/2019 01:28 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I've also noticed they tend to be paranoid and hold grudges, the never forgive and forget. is that pretty accurate for a narcissist to behave that way?
 Quoting: chasity


Yeah, sometimes I’ve wanted to say I’m sorry for making you feel this way... do you think they will accept that?
angel2lmmerrychristmasangel2

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Santa cutie, been an awful good girl!
chasity  (OP)
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11/30/2019 01:46 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I think the long shadow of WW2 and the new TV generation with new vaccines and the way of life for a period after really produced people with an inability to cope and have healthy human attachment. Maybe it was social - maybe it was culture - maybe it was environmental - I dunno.

I know there has been so much separation lately and talk about generational differences - but seriously almost all x peers of mine have very emotionally damaging/damaged parents - sometimes both, sometimes just one - raging toxic narcissists. Its like there was something in the water ~


You also have the idea that the world is a hologram filled with NPC or robotic souless entities - I don't know the answers. But it simplifies things if you just think of people as programmed like computers and some are just not capable of running certain software ~ damaged broken computers everywhere.

Sorry for your pain. Try and take care of your hearts people and let go of the things we can't solve. Peace.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77983873


It's crossed my mind that these people are soul less. Which makes me question the whole religious thing that they can have a chance but then they were born with no chance because psychotic people are born with their brains functioning in a different manner. They can't control it. It's also been around a lot longer than wwII because we have bibles that describe Satan and my dad as exactly the same type of entity. There is no hope for them and people are like pray from their souls, they have no fucking soul.

Thanks for your kind words, the pain is mostly gone, I'm just in shock now actually understanding it all. My husband says I behave like I have Stockholm syndrome by forgiving my parents and not hating them for being born assholes.
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
Anonymous Coward
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11/30/2019 01:49 PM
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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I never did believe it. I always thought that would be egotistical on my part to think someone would want my life.

And now I've done some research and realize these people that gaslight are narcissistic and for them to be jealous would mean they want what I/we have, they would never want that, they would rather see it all destroyed. They want their targets to be miserable like them. They are always single too because they are unable to maintain meaningful relationships in their lives. Idk if they keep multiple target or if they just work on one person at a time. Does anyone have any knowledge about this and what happens when there is no more contact, when you shut that person out and they can no longer harass you, do they move onto someone else? Do they always have a need to try to destroy a person?
 Quoting: chasity


They can be called up all over the place.

But they're fairly professional, and they stick to their work.

Yeah, they kind of enjoy it. I'm sure they were selected by someone for it.

But they go from job to job, with detachment.





GLP