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People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that

 
chasity  (OP)
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11/30/2019 01:55 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I've also noticed they tend to be paranoid and hold grudges, the never forgive and forget. is that pretty accurate for a narcissist to behave that way?
 Quoting: chasity


Yeah, sometimes I’ve wanted to say I’m sorry for making you feel this way... do you think they will accept that?
 Quoting: LittleMe


No, they can't stoop to the level of being on even ground with someone they believe they are way above.

We took my dad black Friday shopping yesterday to buy a big TV. He got a 65in for $300. My husband and I were smiling ear to ear, we were so happy he got this, we enjoyed taking him there to buy it, my husband wanted to buy it for us but we don't have room for it, I said where are you going to put it in the garage????

We went to his house and set it up. After we set it up, it's a saying in our culture, when someone gets something new we say, "with goodness use this/wear this drive this" It's like a blessing. and his response is supposed to be "may you have something even better then me" My dad couldn't say it, he fumbled it up and said thank you I will enjoy this to it's fullest. lol

They don't have it in them to wish any goodness on anyone. There is no equal footing, we will never have anything better than what they have. LOL including the house full of mice my dad lives in. We set traps for him everywhere only to listen to him blame one of my kids for letting them in because we open and close his door. My husband has been holding back and biting his tongue to not tell him off because he's my dad. Nothing is ever their fault, they don't have to forgive you because they are like Gods, we will never have anything better than them and they will never hope that we do! lol
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Anonymous Coward
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11/30/2019 04:06 PM
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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Are women targeted more than men by narcissists?
 Quoting: chasity


There are 10x more women narcissists than men.

Also, of you look into the reason WHY people develop narcissism, you'll see that narcissists are quite jealous of the people they Target.
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11/30/2019 04:10 PM
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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I've also noticed they tend to be paranoid and hold grudges, the never forgive and forget. is that pretty accurate for a narcissist to behave that way?
 Quoting: chasity


Yeah, sometimes I’ve wanted to say I’m sorry for making you feel this way... do you think they will accept that?
 Quoting: LittleMe


No, they can't stoop to the level of being on even ground with someone they believe they are way above.

We took my dad black Friday shopping yesterday to buy a big TV. He got a 65in for $300. My husband and I were smiling ear to ear, we were so happy he got this, we enjoyed taking him there to buy it, my husband wanted to buy it for us but we don't have room for it, I said where are you going to put it in the garage????

We went to his house and set it up. After we set it up, it's a saying in our culture, when someone gets something new we say, "with goodness use this/wear this drive this" It's like a blessing. and his response is supposed to be "may you have something even better then me" My dad couldn't say it, he fumbled it up and said thank you I will enjoy this to it's fullest. lol

They don't have it in them to wish any goodness on anyone. There is no equal footing, we will never have anything better than what they have. LOL including the house full of mice my dad lives in. We set traps for him everywhere only to listen to him blame one of my kids for letting them in because we open and close his door. My husband has been holding back and biting his tongue to not tell him off because he's my dad. Nothing is ever their fault, they don't have to forgive you because they are like Gods, we will never have anything better than them and they will never hope that we do! lol
 Quoting: chasity


I read 2 of your posts and i can tell already that YOU are the narcissist in the group.

Source: I'm a clinical psychologist.
LittleMe
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11/30/2019 06:30 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I've also noticed they tend to be paranoid and hold grudges, the never forgive and forget. is that pretty accurate for a narcissist to behave that way?
 Quoting: chasity


Yeah, sometimes I’ve wanted to say I’m sorry for making you feel this way... do you think they will accept that?
 Quoting: LittleMe


No, they can't stoop to the level of being on even ground with someone they believe they are way above.

We took my dad black Friday shopping yesterday to buy a big TV. He got a 65in for $300. My husband and I were smiling ear to ear, we were so happy he got this, we enjoyed taking him there to buy it, my husband wanted to buy it for us but we don't have room for it, I said where are you going to put it in the garage????

We went to his house and set it up. After we set it up, it's a saying in our culture, when someone gets something new we say, "with goodness use this/wear this drive this" It's like a blessing. and his response is supposed to be "may you have something even better then me" My dad couldn't say it, he fumbled it up and said thank you I will enjoy this to it's fullest. lol

They don't have it in them to wish any goodness on anyone. There is no equal footing, we will never have anything better than what they have. LOL including the house full of mice my dad lives in. We set traps for him everywhere only to listen to him blame one of my kids for letting them in because we open and close his door. My husband has been holding back and biting his tongue to not tell him off because he's my dad. Nothing is ever their fault, they don't have to forgive you because they are like Gods, we will never have anything better than them and they will never hope that we do! lol
 Quoting: chasity


How could they think they’re way above someone? That’s very narcissist and yeah, they do think they’re god like. And you’re right, they’re not gonna even like me approaching them cuz they think they’re superior than me and I have no problem of them thinking of me as an inferior being ... I own nothing but I have everything I need cuz MY FATHER is my provider.


Why does your father act like that? He should be so thankful for having a son -husband- and a daughter who care for him and for those little angels, his grandchildren. You guys bought him a tv and he reacts like that? That’s sad! Why does your father treats you like that, when you’re the only one who’s there for him?


While my granddaddy spoiled me my father was the one to put my feet in the ground telling me that I have show love, respect, and compassion to others, specially to the most unfortunate ones... I used to frustrate my father a lot with my childish responses like why should I care about others, why should I show compassion to those indigenous people that don’t look like me?, my poor father never give up on me and I’m so thankful for his long lectures. He wanted me to be humble and put myself below others and never judge them cuz I’m no better than them... I was just a little girl but he had very high expectations.
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chasity  (OP)
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12/01/2019 07:33 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
My dad paid for his tv, we found the deal and he wanted it so we took him.

I actually feel so much better now that I understand this and I see justice, karma is real. Each and every one of them have paid a serious price and I lived to see it. That's the way the cookie crumbles.
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Colour Crusader

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12/01/2019 07:44 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Yes, I am sorry to hear it also. Quite a "playing field" for learning. Should you (or anyone else) require help, please consult my thread WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? CHOOSE A QUALITY WHICH HELPS, link below.

Are women targeted more than men by narcissists?
 Quoting: chasity


i don't think narcissists target anyone in particular. they are too busy thinking of themselves. i do think that social media has created more narcissism, or at least brought them more into the spotlight. with that said, i think everyone has some narcissistic tendencies, but at a certain point, it becomes a problem.
 Quoting: JJ Johns


I know my mom targeted my sister after I cut all contact and when my sisters husband threw her out of their house she's working on her niece and now my cousin is getting divorced because of the influence my mom had on her. There are lots of us just sitting back and watching this now but the people involved don't believe it until it happens to them.
 Quoting: chasity


narcissists in the family are the most difficult to deal with. sounds rough. sorry to hear. hf
 Quoting: JJ Johns

Colour Crusader: may we fill the world with vibrant colour, constant critical assessment and deep compassion, moving ever forward towards a paradise of our own creating

Thread THE WORLD WILL BECOME PEACEFUL, BEAUTIFUL AND ABUNDANT IF ..
Thread: The world will become peaceful, beautiful and abundant IF ....

Thread INCREDIBLE VOICES: THE MOST PERSONAL EXPRESSION OF THE HUMAN CONDITION
Thread: INCREDIBLE VOICES, AND MUSIC WHICH COMFORTS AND INSPIRES IN DIFFICULT TIMES

Thread: WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? CHOOSE THE QUALITY WHICH HELPS
Thread: WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? SOLVE IT BY CHOOSING A QUALITY

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Thread: IS YOUR JOB USEFUL AND FULFILLING? WHAT IS YOUR VOCATION? DREAM ON
Anonymous Coward
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12/01/2019 08:34 AM
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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I've found myself to have several relationships with narcasicisstic people throughout my life. I attract them. It took some time to realize, I was playing a role as well. I did a lot of research and found it's a common pattern. Often leaving one relationship, maybe going no contacr, you will energetically look to recreate that dynamic with another. Co dependency is a term you see used to describe these relationships. I continue to work on myself to not play the victim role.
chasity  (OP)
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12/01/2019 08:47 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I've found myself to have several relationships with narcasicisstic people throughout my life. I attract them. It took some time to realize, I was playing a role as well. I did a lot of research and found it's a common pattern. Often leaving one relationship, maybe going no contacr, you will energetically look to recreate that dynamic with another. Co dependency is a term you see used to describe these relationships. I continue to work on myself to not play the victim role.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75945643


I never felt like a victim. I knew from very young that something wasn't right and all I wanted was for my parents to love me so I did back flips doing stuff for them to please them. I also had people outside the family circle that knew me confirm my mom was nuts and my dad is living a completely separate life from the family lol.

But yeah, after no contact with my dad I invited him back in but it's different now that he has health problems, he is more vulnerable and nobody else will have anything to do with him in the family. He always told me I didn't belong to that family and now he doesn't because they won't talk to him. Now I have started my own family and we have strict boundaries with him otherwise he won't ever leave. I didn't end up alone like him and my mother.

Last Edited by chasity on 12/01/2019 08:48 AM
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LittleMe
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12/01/2019 09:23 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I've found myself to have several relationships with narcasicisstic people throughout my life. I attract them. It took some time to realize, I was playing a role as well. I did a lot of research and found it's a common pattern. Often leaving one relationship, maybe going no contacr, you will energetically look to recreate that dynamic with another. Co dependency is a term you see used to describe these relationships. I continue to work on myself to not play the victim role.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75945643


I never felt like a victim. I knew from very young that something wasn't right and all I wanted was for my parents to love me so I did back flips doing stuff for them to please them. I also had people outside the family circle that knew me confirm my mom was nuts and my dad is living a completely separate life from the family lol.

But yeah, after no contact with my dad I invited him back in but it's different now that he has health problems, he is more vulnerable and nobody else will have anything to do with him in the family. He always told me I didn't belong to that family and now he doesn't because they won't talk to him. Now I have started my own family and we have strict boundaries with him otherwise he won't ever leave. I didn't end up alone like him and my mother.
 Quoting: chasity


In their heads, they are the victims, the ones being attacked and misunderstood. Again, in their heads they think they’re absolutely right and know the truth and can see it. Very typical of them, calling out people and pretend to be the victim and the scary part is that other people go along with it.

Yes, it happened to me too, always trying to please my half sisters but for them I was the bad seed, the evil one, but at the end they always agreed with me and asked for advice cuz I’m the one with the brains and solve their problems.

Yeah, now that I too have my own family I don’t feel alone and my children are my life... cutting them off was the best decision I’ve ever made in my life.
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XeroGravity
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12/01/2019 09:25 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Chasity: Everyone these days has fucked up dysfunctional families. Now that you started a family of your own, put'em in the rearview mirror & don't let them drag you (or the family you built) down. And most important of all, DO NOT morph into your mother. I've had a large number of women in my life over the years & would guess 95% of them sooner or later reflect their mother's good & bad habits in their own lives.

On the rare occasions I let myself develop feelings for a woman, before I take a leap into commitment, I try to get the 411 on the woman's mother. Men are the same - they almost always emulate their fathers. If they came from broken homes & were raised by single parents of the opposite sex, it gets weirder. Women raised by strong single fathers surprisingly tend to have stronger characters & be more independant - something I like. Their nurturing feminine side is usually a bit lacking but I've had good luck with them so I guess maybe not so bad for me.

Men raised by single mothers tend to be all kinds of fucked up. They always go out looking for a replacement father figure & tend to gravitate towards shit disturbers. My father died when I was 12 shattering our happy home, & I confess I might have fallen into that trap a bit myself. My poor mother tried to rein me in but I was too much to handle. Luckily my old man was a good guy & he schooled me on character & values enough to pull me through. Nonetheless I fell in with all the wrong people in my teens & 20s. I was lucky, I found that "once in a lifetime" kind of gal who straightened me out before I self-destructed. I was downright dangerous & savage, but she civilized my wild ass. It didn't work out in the end but she saved me from myself & I'm grateful.

Don't let your family baggage drag you down. Struggle to be in that 5% who escape the conditioning & persevere for the sake of your family. Become the opposite of your mother. Try to be a rock for your man & keep him happy so you never lose him - and demand he do the same for you.
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InTheGLPHood

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12/01/2019 09:30 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Are women targeted more than men by narcissists?
 Quoting: chasity


i don't think narcissists target anyone in particular. they are too busy thinking of themselves. i do think that social media has created more narcissism, or at least brought them more into the spotlight. with that said, i think everyone has some narcissistic tendencies, but at a certain point, it becomes a problem.
 Quoting: JJ Johns


hf
chasity  (OP)
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12/01/2019 10:39 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
In their heads, they are the victims, the ones being attacked and misunderstood. Again, in their heads they think they’re absolutely right and know the truth and can see it. Very typical of them, calling out people and pretend to be the victim and the scary part is that other people go along with it.
 Quoting: LittleMe


the ones that go along with it are called the "flying monkey's" lol


Yes, it happened to me too, always trying to please my half sisters but for them I was the bad seed, the evil one, but at the end they always agreed with me and asked for advice cuz I’m the one with the brains and solve their problems.
 Quoting: LittleMe


I even went as far as saving my sisters life from a house fire when I was 3 years old and I still never made it to the top favorite list lol! I remember the fireman holding me in his arms standing at the top of the basement stairs telling me what a good job I did and how proud he was of me. I didn't need them to tell me I was awesome, I had random people doing that from early on. Granted some were touching me inappropriately lol but still, I was loved and told I was special by lots of people outside.

Yeah, now that I too have my own family I don’t feel alone and my children are my life... cutting them off was the best decision I’ve ever made in my life.
 Quoting: LittleMe


Oh yeah, having a family, something they don't have is what they don't want us to have. They love to see miserable broken people without anyone to love them. I thank God everyday for my husband and kids.
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
chasity  (OP)
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12/01/2019 10:44 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Chasity: Everyone these days has fucked up dysfunctional families. Now that you started a family of your own, put'em in the rearview mirror & don't let them drag you (or the family you built) down. And most important of all, DO NOT morph into your mother. I've had a large number of women in my life over the years & would guess 95% of them sooner or later reflect their mother's good & bad habits in their own lives.

On the rare occasions I let myself develop feelings for a woman, before I take a leap into commitment, I try to get the 411 on the woman's mother. Men are the same - they almost always emulate their fathers. If they came from broken homes & were raised by single parents of the opposite sex, it gets weirder. Women raised by strong single fathers surprisingly tend to have stronger characters & be more independant - something I like. Their nurturing feminine side is usually a bit lacking but I've had good luck with them so I guess maybe not so bad for me.

Men raised by single mothers tend to be all kinds of fucked up. They always go out looking for a replacement father figure & tend to gravitate towards shit disturbers. My father died when I was 12 shattering our happy home, & I confess I might have fallen into that trap a bit myself. My poor mother tried to rein me in but I was too much to handle. Luckily my old man was a good guy & he schooled me on character & values enough to pull me through. Nonetheless I fell in with all the wrong people in my teens & 20s. I was lucky, I found that "once in a lifetime" kind of gal who straightened me out before I self-destructed. I was downright dangerous & savage, but she civilized my wild ass. It didn't work out in the end but she saved me from myself & I'm grateful.

Don't let your family baggage drag you down. Struggle to be in that 5% who escape the conditioning & persevere for the sake of your family. Become the opposite of your mother. Try to be a rock for your man & keep him happy so you never lose him - and demand he do the same for you.
 Quoting: XeroGravity


flower

This is great advice, thank you. I examine myself daily, when I do something stupid, I see it and explain why I acted the way I did out of frustration.

I remember always thinking my mom taught me what not to do. Although I think her problem is more of a physical thing in her brain that is uncontrollable and I don't think anyone would ever chose to be that big of an asshole.
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
Only Me

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12/02/2019 07:39 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
My sister was married to a sociopathic narcissist for 10 years. For 6 years after the divorce, his entire life goal was to ruin her as best he could. CPS reports, refusal to pay child support, literally quit his job when she started having his paycheck garnished, moved to another state when the legality of it all was getting tough...he manipulated the kids and had them hating her for a while due to a bunch of lies. He's a total psycho. There was so much he did that was so crazy that my sister's lawyer didn't even believe it was that bad until she saw evidence. She said it was the worst case of emotional abuse she had ever seen by far. His own lawyer fired him because he was so psycho! Just last month he told their oldest he wanted nothing to do with her because she chose the evil mom over him. Ugh
 Quoting: Only Me


He sounds dangerous.
She and her children are fortunate to have survived.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77983873


During the legal proceedings for child support (still ongoing, mind you), a tape of a 911 call was brought in. It was his new wife calling because she was in their garage and he was having a fit and threw her keys and broke them. My guess is she was trying to get away, but it's not clear. Some crisis intervention team got called and she told them on the phone they would have to make him go to the hospital for a mental eval because he wouldn't just go. Once they arrived, surprise! All was well! Oh no, just a big misunderstanding! She overreacted....he wasn't throwing any fits....*riiiiight*

And his new wife? Yeah, same color hair, same name as my sister. Creepy right? Only this one is in her 20's, so I'm sure she's much easier to control.

He and his new wife even got a dog and named him the name he and my sister were going to give their child if they had a boy (they wound up having all girls).

Yeah, he's super crazy and scary.
Goodbye, halcyon days...

 There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

There is another theory mentioned, which states that this has already happened.
Only Me

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12/02/2019 07:48 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I wish I was more like my mother, so here's a different perspective. We don't always turn out like our mothers. My mom is way more social than I am. She likes going places and talking to people. She has many friends and always on the go. She's a hugger. Doesn't know a stranger. Cares for everyone. I was coddled as a child mostly, because she was always so kind and supportive.

On the other hand, I'm introverted and can't stand crowds. Only have a select few people I will hang out with, and even fewer I will even hug. I watch her and wonder how I even came from her because I'm so far into my shell.

Its not always that a woman will turn out like her mom regardless of whether the mom is good or not.
Goodbye, halcyon days...

 There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

There is another theory mentioned, which states that this has already happened.
LittleMe
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12/02/2019 07:57 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
My sister was married to a sociopathic narcissist for 10 years. For 6 years after the divorce, his entire life goal was to ruin her as best he could. CPS reports, refusal to pay child support, literally quit his job when she started having his paycheck garnished, moved to another state when the legality of it all was getting tough...he manipulated the kids and had them hating her for a while due to a bunch of lies. He's a total psycho. There was so much he did that was so crazy that my sister's lawyer didn't even believe it was that bad until she saw evidence. She said it was the worst case of emotional abuse she had ever seen by far. His own lawyer fired him because he was so psycho! Just last month he told their oldest he wanted nothing to do with her because she chose the evil mom over him. Ugh
 Quoting: Only Me


He sounds dangerous.
She and her children are fortunate to have survived.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77983873


During the legal proceedings for child support (still ongoing, mind you), a tape of a 911 call was brought in. It was his new wife calling because she was in their garage and he was having a fit and threw her keys and broke them. My guess is she was trying to get away, but it's not clear. Some crisis intervention team got called and she told them on the phone they would have to make him go to the hospital for a mental eval because he wouldn't just go. Once they arrived, surprise! All was well! Oh no, just a big misunderstanding! She overreacted....he wasn't throwing any fits....*riiiiight*

And his new wife? Yeah, same color hair, same name as my sister. Creepy right? Only this one is in her 20's, so I'm sure she's much easier to control.

He and his new wife even got a dog and named him the name he and my sister were going to give their child if they had a boy (they wound up having all girls).

Yeah, he's super crazy and scary.
 Quoting: Only Me


I’m so sorry! verysad


He definitely has psychological issues... I hope your sister and her children are receiving therapy and the children having some evaluations too cuz of the father.

Love, prayers, and blessings to your sister and her little angels!

flowers
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LittleMe
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12/02/2019 08:13 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I wish I was more like my mother, so here's a different perspective. We don't always turn out like our mothers. My mom is way more social than I am. She likes going places and talking to people. She has many friends and always on the go. She's a hugger. Doesn't know a stranger. Cares for everyone. I was coddled as a child mostly, because she was always so kind and supportive.

On the other hand, I'm introverted and can't stand crowds. Only have a select few people I will hang out with, and even fewer I will even hug. I watch her and wonder how I even came from her because I'm so far into my shell.

Its not always that a woman will turn out like her mom regardless of whether the mom is good or not.
 Quoting: Only Me


You’re not alone, my dear! hugs I’m introverted and extremely emotional. My family calls me “vampire” cuz I prefer going grocery shopping at night (almost midnight) just to avoid people... I can’t stand crowds too, they drain my energy or maybe I absorb their nasty energy.

My grandparents raised me and overprotected me, specially my granddaddy, he was my hero, my shield, and always rescuing me from others, even from my own mother. He’s gone for 19 years and I still cry when someone hurt me and he’s not with me anymore to protect me.

My mother too is a strong person, she always says, “I don’t understand why you’re so emotional, why don’t you just be like me?”... I might look strong but I’m very fragile.


I love you, my precious Only Me!


lmkiss
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chasity  (OP)
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12/02/2019 08:14 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
My sister was married to a sociopathic narcissist for 10 years. For 6 years after the divorce, his entire life goal was to ruin her as best he could. CPS reports, refusal to pay child support, literally quit his job when she started having his paycheck garnished, moved to another state when the legality of it all was getting tough...he manipulated the kids and had them hating her for a while due to a bunch of lies. He's a total psycho. There was so much he did that was so crazy that my sister's lawyer didn't even believe it was that bad until she saw evidence. She said it was the worst case of emotional abuse she had ever seen by far. His own lawyer fired him because he was so psycho! Just last month he told their oldest he wanted nothing to do with her because she chose the evil mom over him. Ugh
 Quoting: Only Me


He sounds dangerous.
She and her children are fortunate to have survived.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77983873


During the legal proceedings for child support (still ongoing, mind you), a tape of a 911 call was brought in. It was his new wife calling because she was in their garage and he was having a fit and threw her keys and broke them. My guess is she was trying to get away, but it's not clear. Some crisis intervention team got called and she told them on the phone they would have to make him go to the hospital for a mental eval because he wouldn't just go. Once they arrived, surprise! All was well! Oh no, just a big misunderstanding! She overreacted....he wasn't throwing any fits....*riiiiight*

And his new wife? Yeah, same color hair, same name as my sister. Creepy right? Only this one is in her 20's, so I'm sure she's much easier to control.

He and his new wife even got a dog and named him the name he and my sister were going to give their child if they had a boy (they wound up having all girls).

Yeah, he's super crazy and scary.
 Quoting: Only Me


He is insane. That poor woman with him now.
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
ChipModerator
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12/02/2019 08:16 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Yes. If they can't have it....NOBODY CAN!!!

DAMNEDBIG

"I don't give a tuppenny fuck about your moral conundrum, you meat-headed shit-sack." ~Bill the Butcher

"Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." ~Arthur C. Clarke

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"THE PLANET IS FINE! THE PEOPLE ARE FUCKED" ~George Carlin
chasity  (OP)
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12/02/2019 08:20 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I wish I was more like my mother, so here's a different perspective. We don't always turn out like our mothers. My mom is way more social than I am. She likes going places and talking to people. She has many friends and always on the go. She's a hugger. Doesn't know a stranger. Cares for everyone. I was coddled as a child mostly, because she was always so kind and supportive.

On the other hand, I'm introverted and can't stand crowds. Only have a select few people I will hang out with, and even fewer I will even hug. I watch her and wonder how I even came from her because I'm so far into my shell.

Its not always that a woman will turn out like her mom regardless of whether the mom is good or not.
 Quoting: Only Me


You sound so sweet too, and just like my middle child. I make sure I hug her the most! She's 13 and the same size as me but I always grab her and plop her into my lap! She is the most receptive and these least rebellious when it comes to teaching her right from wrong.
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
chasity  (OP)
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12/02/2019 08:23 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Yes. If they can't have it....NOBODY CAN!!!

DAMNEDBIG
 Quoting: Chip


wtf, You know my mom or something? lol

That is exactly what my mom said when going through her divorce with my dad. My dad wanted to give the house to my sister and I and she said nope. If I can't have it, nobody can. So the house ended up getting foreclosed with only $2500 remaining on the mortgage.

Last Edited by chasity on 12/02/2019 08:23 AM
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
ChipModerator
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12/02/2019 08:28 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Yes. If they can't have it....NOBODY CAN!!!

DAMNEDBIG
 Quoting: Chip


wtf, You know my mom or something? lol

That is exactly what my mom said when going through her divorce with my dad. My dad wanted to give the house to my sister and I and she said nope. If I can't have it, nobody can. So the house ended up getting foreclosed with only $2500 remaining on the mortgage.
 Quoting: chasity


Some people are sick like that. They peer out into the world through a glass of jealousy and anger. When they locate a target they throw everything they've got at it in anger. Not for justice or to stop harm...but just because they couldn't achieve that for themselves.

fact

Last Edited by Chip on 12/02/2019 08:29 AM

"I don't give a tuppenny fuck about your moral conundrum, you meat-headed shit-sack." ~Bill the Butcher

"Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." ~Arthur C. Clarke

"He's a nut-bag! Just because the fucker's got a library card doesn't make him Yoda!" ~David Mills ~ Se7en


"THE PLANET IS FINE! THE PEOPLE ARE FUCKED" ~George Carlin
chasity  (OP)
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12/02/2019 10:43 AM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Are women targeted more than men by narcissists?
 Quoting: chasity


No , Honey ... but certain personality types are for instance a INFJ or a INFP ... You can go to 16 personalities . com if You don't know Your type ...
 Quoting: beenthruthat


are you saying these personality types fall on the narcissistic spectrum? I read my mom and dad's personality exactly her in one of those. It makes sense because narcissist make up a very small portion of the population and they rare like that when they fall on the extreme end of the spectrum. They always claim to be victims of something or another too.

Last Edited by chasity on 12/02/2019 10:43 AM
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Anonymous Coward
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12/02/2019 11:06 AM
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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
I never did believe it. I always thought that would be egotistical on my part to think someone would want my life.

And now I've done some research and realize these people that gaslight are narcissistic and for them to be jealous would mean they want what I/we have, they would never want that, they would rather see it all destroyed. They want their targets to be miserable like them. They are always single too because they are unable to maintain meaningful relationships in their lives. Idk if they keep multiple target or if they just work on one person at a time. Does anyone have any knowledge about this and what happens when there is no more contact, when you shut that person out and they can no longer harass you, do they move onto someone else? Do they always have a need to try to destroy a person?
 Quoting: chasity


They do need to see you as a worm because it makes them feel better about themselves.

I once asked a close relative why some people put others down.

He said "because it feels good."
The_Meridian
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12/02/2019 12:02 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
OP - I do believe that it is now impossible to hold together a family in any meaningful way.

There are too many ways for decent people to become trash very quickly, people that should know better, were raised better, embrace trash lifestyle and trash anti-ideology.

You be the best YOU can be and don't be trash and keep the rest at the end of a very long pole.

It's lonely...everyone is trash...but better to be lonely than a pig rolling around in the mud with the rest of them.
"Belief is the enemy of knowing." -Crrow777

"Follow your heart, your intuition...it will lead you in the right direction." -Jewel Kitcher
chasity  (OP)
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12/02/2019 12:25 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
OP - I do believe that it is now impossible to hold together a family in any meaningful way.

There are too many ways for decent people to become trash very quickly, people that should know better, were raised better, embrace trash lifestyle and trash anti-ideology.

You be the best YOU can be and don't be trash and keep the rest at the end of a very long pole.

It's lonely...everyone is trash...but better to be lonely than a pig rolling around in the mud with the rest of them.
 Quoting: The_Meridian


Interesting when my dad told me he decided against chaining some construction worker up in the basement he read a sign saying the same thing, something about pigs loving to get dirty too. He already bought the chain, invited him back over to "finish the job" but the guy never showed up and my dad is glad he didn't because he read those exact words and decided he wasn't going to wrestle with a pig.

Do you know your personality type on the 16 personalities thingy? [link to www.16personalities.com (secure)]

Last Edited by chasity on 12/02/2019 12:27 PM
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The_Meridian
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12/02/2019 12:26 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
OP - I do believe that it is now impossible to hold together a family in any meaningful way.

There are too many ways for decent people to become trash very quickly, people that should know better, were raised better, embrace trash lifestyle and trash anti-ideology.

You be the best YOU can be and don't be trash and keep the rest at the end of a very long pole.

It's lonely...everyone is trash...but better to be lonely than a pig rolling around in the mud with the rest of them.
 Quoting: The_Meridian


Interesting when my dad told me he decided against chaining some construction worker up in the basement he read a sign saying the same thing, something about pigs loving to get dirty too. He already bought the chain, invited him back over to "finish the job" but the guy never showed up and my dad is glad he didn't because he read those exact words and decided he wasn't going to wrestle with a pig.
 Quoting: chasity


lol I think I may have missed a detail or two but yeah...
"Belief is the enemy of knowing." -Crrow777

"Follow your heart, your intuition...it will lead you in the right direction." -Jewel Kitcher
LittleMe
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12/02/2019 01:59 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
In their heads, they are the victims, the ones being attacked and misunderstood. Again, in their heads they think they’re absolutely right and know the truth and can see it. Very typical of them, calling out people and pretend to be the victim and the scary part is that other people go along with it.
 Quoting: LittleMe


the ones that go along with it are called the "flying monkey's" lol


Yes, it happened to me too, always trying to please my half sisters but for them I was the bad seed, the evil one, but at the end they always agreed with me and asked for advice cuz I’m the one with the brains and solve their problems.
 Quoting: LittleMe


I even went as far as saving my sisters life from a house fire when I was 3 years old and I still never made it to the top favorite list lol! I remember the fireman holding me in his arms standing at the top of the basement stairs telling me what a good job I did and how proud he was of me. I didn't need them to tell me I was awesome, I had random people doing that from early on. Granted some were touching me inappropriately lol but still, I was loved and told I was special by lots of people outside.

Yeah, now that I too have my own family I don’t feel alone and my children are my life... cutting them off was the best decision I’ve ever made in my life.
 Quoting: LittleMe


Oh yeah, having a family, something they don't have is what they don't want us to have. They love to see miserable broken people without anyone to love them. I thank God everyday for my husband and kids.
 Quoting: chasity


Hmmm, let me understand this. They shit and the flying monkeys stir that shit.




Oh, yeah... I think it’s GOD who send those angels - I see them as angels - to tell us what our own family is incapable to. I have received love and appreciation from strangers than from my own sisters. My half sisters’ mother loved me as her own daughter and maybe that’s one of the reasons they never liked me, she was a saint and loved her even more that my own mother.




Exactly! They’re so miserable. This half sister was friends with my husband, well, good friends since they were 13, but I never thought that they had a thing, how can I think something like that cuz she’s my sister, right?. When my husband and I started dating she used to talk shit to him about me even after we got married and had our first child... I loved her so much and wanted her to be part of my life but she was the one stabbing me over and over and I didn’t know... just two years ago I found out she slept with my husband, they were doing it in front of my fucking nose but the love for my sister made it impossible to see it when everyone knew it. I did understand so so many things, why she’s always on my husband side, why she’s always judging me, why she’s always bitter at me, why she’s always talking shit about me and saying that I’m a horrible person; I felt disgusted and broken... I didn’t care about my husband cuz he’s only a husband and tomorrow he could be an “ex-husband” but my sister is my sister for the rest of my life... and I didn’t mention that I helped her when she came to the States, I always saw her as my little sister and did even the impossible to help her and her child.

I’m so thankful for my five children... MY FATHER gave me five knights!
angel2lmmerrychristmasangel2

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Santa cutie, been an awful good girl!
chasity  (OP)
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12/02/2019 04:06 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
Exactly! They’re so miserable. This half sister was friends with my husband, well, good friends since they were 13, but I never thought that they had a thing, how can I think something like that cuz she’s my sister, right?. When my husband and I started dating she used to talk shit to him about me even after we got married and had our first child... I loved her so much and wanted her to be part of my life but she was the one stabbing me over and over and I didn’t know... just two years ago I found out she slept with my husband, they were doing it in front of my fucking nose but the love for my sister made it impossible to see it when everyone knew it. I did understand so so many things, why she’s always on my husband side, why she’s always judging me, why she’s always bitter at me, why she’s always talking shit about me and saying that I’m a horrible person; I felt disgusted and broken... I didn’t care about my husband cuz he’s only a husband and tomorrow he could be an “ex-husband” but my sister is my sister for the rest of my life... and I didn’t mention that I helped her when she came to the States, I always saw her as my little sister and did even the impossible to help her and her child.

I’m so thankful for my five children... MY FATHER gave me five knights!
 Quoting: LittleMe


This is what makes it worse, it's family doing this nasty shit. Why are some people without a moral compass? No understanding of what loyalty means. I don't believe the cliche blood is thicker than water when it comes to family. They use that shit to justify being assholes and us forgiving them. Whoever said that shit I hope he's burning in hell!
If heaven had a scent it would smell like a bird.
LittleMe
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12/02/2019 06:58 PM

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Re: People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that
This is what makes it worse, it's family doing this nasty shit. Why are some people without a moral compass? No understanding of what loyalty means. I don't believe the cliche blood is thicker than water when it comes to family. They use that shit to justify being assholes and us forgiving them. Whoever said that shit I hope he's burning in hell!
 Quoting: chasity


Of course she denied, when everything was so obvious lol ... my other half sister wanted me and her to talk about it, my answer was I will do it only if her husband is there too... she never mentioned it again.

Yeah, our worse enemies could be our own family.
angel2lmmerrychristmasangel2

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Santa cutie, been an awful good girl!





GLP