People have told me that others are "just jealous", I don't belive that

There's some irony in complaining about your family's resident narcissist while in the throes of telling us ALL you've been targeted for destruction.

You may already be your mother.

Probably.

xoxoxo

stfu gaslighter

And the sad part is that some people go along with them...

They have an image to uphold, they want people to see them in a particular way. They use physical things like their home decorations and their photos to portray something they believe will lure people in.

I heard therapists can see this right away but it takes years of therapy before they can tell the person this is what they are, most times they don't. Even therapists know it's very difficult to tell these people they have a personality defect.

Well, I see it this way, they only can give what they have, plain and simple.

A miserable person who hates his own life will hate others too and want them to be miserable like them.

I actually feel bad for hating my sister all these years for going along with my mom. She was just trying to please her like how I was trying to please my dad. But she had both to please, at least I only had my dad, half the load and I wasn't financially dependent on either of them she was. I feel bad for making fun of her for being overweight and having a stroke before she turned 50. She was the favorite and got the worst of it. She finally cut my dad out but she still is hanging onto my mom, she's really hard to shake loose. And of course my mom and dad saw nothing wrong with my sister and I not having a relationship. This is what my mom wanted, no relationships for me, then she went to work on breaking my sisters life into pieces.

Last Edited by By Owner Req on 11/30/2019 09:02 AM

People seem to do this without even being aware fully of what they are doing to themselves and others.

Manipulating themselves, their environment, and the other person or peoples they wish to seduce/harm.

The society we live in promotes it heavily, and does very little to combat the wickedness. You have to really over step your bounds to get in trouble these days for immoral acts.

They lack awareness and are unable to look within themselves. They are all surface, there is absolutely no depth with them. I think that's why it's easy to see this online with some people, conversations lack sincerity, in retrospection. Anyone can say god bless you or I'm praying for you, in fact this is very common for those types of people.

Last Edited by By Owner Req on 11/30/2019 09:00 AM

The instant I determine a person is a liar I put distance between myself & them. Habitual liars tend to be the very same people who blame their troubles on anything & everything except themselves. If a person refuses to take responsibility for their failings or shortcomings, they'll never expend the effort to correct them. Very self-defeating attitude.

When you let people like that in your life, they ALWAYS stick the knife in your back - sometimes because it benefits them, other times because they simply enjoy tearing other people down. And if you adopt an aggressive philosophy of constant self-improvement & strive to better yourself, haters & parasites are drawn to you. That includes friends & family especially.

My 2 cents.

I think in my case my mom started out as gossiping about me. I've heard from numerous people the things she has said and they came to me actually feeling sorry for me and it was my mom looking for sympathy. Then it turned into blaming me for her divorcing my dad lol.

They are just all over the place. The end product is always the same.

I learned early never to listen or take advice from people that blame others. Not only do they lie to you, they lie to themselves. I like people that can use their life mistakes as examples to becoming better, those people can be trusted.

This.

.

No , Honey ... but certain personality types are for instance a INFJ or a INFP ... You can go to 16 personalities . com if You don't know Your type ...

I would never understand why some people want others have a miserable life, I just can’t!

A mother is supposed to keep all her children together and not make them apart from each other. A real loving mother doesn’t make their children’s lives miserable. I’m so sorry my dear love about your mother... years ago my awesome therapist made me write down my mother’s neglects and also write down what I do for my own children, and made me compare, she said to me be happy cuz you’re not your mother and you love your children and you would die for them not like your selfish mother... I can see you’re not like your mother, my sweetheart. And I think having those type of psycho mothers helped us to be who we are and how we raised and love our beautiful children.

I have five boys, my little brother who I raised as my own child and my husband loves and treats him like his son, and my four biological children... there’s no favoritism in my house, I love them the same. I compare them like the fingers of my hand, different fingers but I love and need them in my life.

We can’t change people lives but the good part is that we can change ours... I have learned to avoid those types and my life have changed for good ... we don’t want energy vampires in our lives!

I've done this test before and does our personality change with experience? I got ISFJ-A today.

I think narcissist give very strange advice too lol.

Any examples of their wisdom?

Because NPDs are so charming and charismatic and lie, and lie more. And they are in total denial that they are doing anything wrong. It's always someone else's fault or to blame.

Ways to tell if someone is lying:
they try to convince you of something, rather than convey information.
they are vague and can't remember details.
they change the subject.
all forms of manipulation.

Their goal is to get their needs met.

This.

This is just so bizarre. It's even more bizarre for me to realize I the source of their needs. I could never understand why, at least I know it has a name now.

lol wisdom????? there are none! It's too bizarre.

When we bought our house, the refrigerator that was here didn't work and we didn't know this until we moved in. We didn't have the money so we had to buy it on credit and we used an interest free for 18 months or so card. My dad told us the strangest advice and my husband and I can still scratch our heads to this day and not understand wtf did he mean by that? But it ended with, "that's the way the cookie crumbles" talking about how we made a mistake buying a house with a refrigerator that didn't work and we use that line as a joke when one of us is pondering something.

It always has nothing to do with what is going on but they want to come across as having something wise to say.

I've also noticed they tend to be paranoid and hold grudges, the never forgive and forget. is that pretty accurate for a narcissist to behave that way?

He sounds dangerous.
She and her children are fortunate to have survived.

I think the long shadow of WW2 and the new TV generation with new vaccines and the way of life for a period after really produced people with an inability to cope and have healthy human attachment. Maybe it was social - maybe it was culture - maybe it was environmental - I dunno.

I know there has been so much separation lately and talk about generational differences - but seriously almost all x peers of mine have very emotionally damaging/damaged parents - sometimes both, sometimes just one - raging toxic narcissists. Its like there was something in the water ~


You also have the idea that the world is a hologram filled with NPC or robotic souless entities - I don't know the answers. But it simplifies things if you just think of people as programmed like computers and some are just not capable of running certain software ~ damaged broken computers everywhere.

Sorry for your pain. Try and take care of your hearts people and let go of the things we can't solve. Peace.

Yeah, it makes so much sense... it could be mammoth in the room but they will not notice it cuz they think they’re as big as a sun... poor souls!

Yeah, sometimes I’ve wanted to say I’m sorry for making you feel this way... do you think they will accept that?

It's crossed my mind that these people are soul less. Which makes me question the whole religious thing that they can have a chance but then they were born with no chance because psychotic people are born with their brains functioning in a different manner. They can't control it. It's also been around a lot longer than wwII because we have bibles that describe Satan and my dad as exactly the same type of entity. There is no hope for them and people are like pray from their souls, they have no fucking soul.

Thanks for your kind words, the pain is mostly gone, I'm just in shock now actually understanding it all. My husband says I behave like I have Stockholm syndrome by forgiving my parents and not hating them for being born assholes.

They can be called up all over the place.

But they're fairly professional, and they stick to their work.

Yeah, they kind of enjoy it. I'm sure they were selected by someone for it.

But they go from job to job, with detachment.