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The situation

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 76984449
United States
02/05/2020 07:48 AM
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Re: The situation
Get a good baby sitter so you can spend time together on the weekends. And go with her to the in laws. Y’all need to sit down and talk about what both of you need. Baby sitter ASAP.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76984449


Yep, cut the in-laws out.
See if the little pumpkin improves.

Or change job shifts so one parent can be with the children at all times.
 Quoting: MissCleo


I have a friend who is with the children during the day and works part time in the evening when the husband is at home. Parents should do what they can to raise the children. Then they know the children aren’t being abused.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76984449


Yep. I did that too, split shifts. Was great, gave me free time so I didn't have to see the husband all the time too.

And I found babysitters I could trust. But rarely left my daughter with a babysitter, she was with me all the time.

Kids can't verbalize until around 12. (most men until around 50, haha). So we have to look for signs that something is wrong. Night terrors is a definite. Don't ignore the kid or think they are displaying "bad" behavior. Something is wrong. Be the adult and figure it the fuck out.
 Quoting: MissCleo


So true.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 76984449
United States
02/05/2020 07:51 AM
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Re: The situation
...


Yep, cut the in-laws out.
See if the little pumpkin improves.

Or change job shifts so one parent can be with the children at all times.
 Quoting: MissCleo


I have a friend who is with the children during the day and works part time in the evening when the husband is at home. Parents should do what they can to raise the children. Then they know the children aren’t being abused.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76984449


Yep. I did that too, split shifts. Was great, gave me free time so I didn't have to see the husband all the time too.

And I found babysitters I could trust. But rarely left my daughter with a babysitter, she was with me all the time.

Kids can't verbalize until around 12. (most men until around 50, haha). So we have to look for signs that something is wrong. Night terrors is a definite. Don't ignore the kid or think they are displaying "bad" behavior. Something is wrong. Be the adult and figure it the fuck out.
 Quoting: MissCleo


So true.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76984449


And interesting about kids not being able to verbalize until around 12. Didn’t know that.
Bloodreddeuce

User ID: 76822672
02/05/2020 08:03 AM
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Re: The situation
Sounds like you knew it was coming. She must be seeing someone else.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76948125


im quite certain there isnt anyone else.. i fucking hope not anyway
 Quoting: 0000001


Spouse is normally last to know. Be direct and ask one of her closest friends if you really want to know. Just remember, If you afraid of the answer, don't ask the question!
MessiahTrump

User ID: 77585423
United States
02/05/2020 08:06 AM

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Re: The situation
5a5a5a5a5a5a5a5a5a5a


Congratulations, when is the party? I would be happy as a pig rolling in shit if my wife left.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 74760167
United States
02/05/2020 08:14 AM
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Re: The situation
At 5, 10, and 20 years your relationship will be tested. When you split with her one of those other two times, was it around the 5 year mark?
Red John
There Can Be Only One

User ID: 56693632
Canada
02/05/2020 08:35 AM

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Re: The situation
See... a woman usually pulls the weight in a marriage. And a man doesn't bring 100%. happens with age.

So she doesn't need you. Unless you are 100% a person and giving that to the relationship.

Truth shouldn't offend anyone. Be honest with her.
 Quoting: MissCleo


nope

when you demand all this 100% bullshit you lock your own mind and heart
with, assumptions, accusations, judgment, condemnation, grudges, bitterness, offenses, and resentment

no one is ever 100%

and it's never to be about owing, earning, demanding, etc.

it always has to be about freedoms
freely sharing all things together
giving out of oneself without expectation of return

if / when I do something for someone, it's because I want to,
not because I have to, or because I'm looking for something in return

as soon as one or the other assumes it's about owing, or earning,
or someone is assuming the other is being demanding

then it moves from freedoms and real
to totally performance based fakery

never do this, it's destructive

never demand 100% no one can meet this outrageous expectation of performance perfection
pixie

General Failure Reading Drive A:
Who is General Failure?

There can be Only One

Fuck off stalkers
0000001  (OP)
Viscous

User ID: 45310407
United Kingdom
02/05/2020 03:51 PM

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Re: The situation
At 5, 10, and 20 years your relationship will be tested. When you split with her one of those other two times, was it around the 5 year mark?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 74760167


Pretty fucking accurate there, mate.
Thats the last time you call me Peter sweetknees dobson.
0000001  (OP)
Viscous

User ID: 45310407
United Kingdom
02/05/2020 04:02 PM

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Re: The situation
Right I'll give you all an update


So ive not eaten anything more than a handful of haribo sweets, a day, since Saturday.

But this evening I have eaten a bowl of mashed potatoes, with salt and pepper, I would of been in serious trouble if i didn't eat something today.


So yesterday, I sent her a long ass text, I didn't get a reply.... That sucked.


And this morning I had roses delivered to her work, with the message 'flippin 'eck xx' on the card (lol)


SHE WASNT AT FUCKING WORK TODAY

so I get an email about midday saying they have been delivered, but I didn't get a text message off her or anything, so that broke my heart a little today.

But I got a text an hour ago asking if i did send flowers, and she put a kiss on the end of the text.

In fact there was two text's from her, both with a kiss on the end.


So......


I'm felling better

I have had something to eat

My kids are here with me, I was so happy to see them I actually started to 'man cry' where you don't cry, but your crying.

My productivity has slumped since Monday, and working in sales, that's not clever, but I have kept the boat afloat, I just need a boost.


I fell a lot better right now.


I have NOT smoked weed since Sunday... It has bothered me that much, I have some, I just dont want it, and thats totally out of character.


Fuck me I've been a right little bitch







Give it a day or two and I'll be in charge of my emotional thoughts again

Last Edited by 0000001 on 02/05/2020 05:49 PM
Thats the last time you call me Peter sweetknees dobson.
0000001  (OP)
Viscous

User ID: 45310407
United Kingdom
02/05/2020 04:05 PM

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Re: The situation
And thanks for your input everyone, it's helped me make some right decisions.
Thats the last time you call me Peter sweetknees dobson.
0000001  (OP)
Viscous

User ID: 45310407
United Kingdom
02/05/2020 04:05 PM

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Re: The situation
Give me a week and I'll be an arsehole again.
Thats the last time you call me Peter sweetknees dobson.
Reilly
User ID: 76715627
Canada
02/05/2020 04:09 PM
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Re: The situation
Don't engage in recreational sexual activities with your wife.

Don't do it ever again! hf


[link to www.youtube.com (secure)]
0000001  (OP)
Viscous

User ID: 45310407
United Kingdom
02/05/2020 04:10 PM

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Re: The situation
Don't engage in recreational sexual activities with your wife.

Don't do it ever again! hf


[link to www.youtube.com (secure)]
 Quoting: Reilly 76715627


Cruise



At least youre consistent bro
Thats the last time you call me Peter sweetknees dobson.
0000001  (OP)
Viscous

User ID: 45310407
United Kingdom
02/05/2020 04:22 PM

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Re: The situation
Glp has witnessed me being at the top of my game, and declining into something awful, in under 10 days, it can happen to the best of us.
Thats the last time you call me Peter sweetknees dobson.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 71582106
United States
02/05/2020 04:33 PM
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Re: The situation
You are looking for happiness outside of yourself. Only you can make you happy. Do not let a woman define who you are.
MissCleo

User ID: 77082640
United States
02/05/2020 04:59 PM

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Re: The situation
...


I have a friend who is with the children during the day and works part time in the evening when the husband is at home. Parents should do what they can to raise the children. Then they know the children aren’t being abused.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76984449


Yep. I did that too, split shifts. Was great, gave me free time so I didn't have to see the husband all the time too.

And I found babysitters I could trust. But rarely left my daughter with a babysitter, she was with me all the time.

Kids can't verbalize until around 12. (most men until around 50, haha). So we have to look for signs that something is wrong. Night terrors is a definite. Don't ignore the kid or think they are displaying "bad" behavior. Something is wrong. Be the adult and figure it the fuck out.
 Quoting: MissCleo


So true.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76984449


And interesting about kids not being able to verbalize until around 12. Didn’t know that.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76984449


Usually around 12 they develop original thought and ability to form adult conversation. Before that they copy, respond, cry and other forms of communication. We have to listen not just to words.
MissCleo

User ID: 77082640
United States
02/05/2020 05:06 PM

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Re: The situation
Give me a week and I'll be an arsehole again.
 Quoting: 0000001


don't be an arsehole. lol
Naunet

User ID: 75919805
United States
02/05/2020 05:48 PM

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Re: The situation
...


Yep. I did that too, split shifts. Was great, gave me free time so I didn't have to see the husband all the time too.

And I found babysitters I could trust. But rarely left my daughter with a babysitter, she was with me all the time.

Kids can't verbalize until around 12. (most men until around 50, haha). So we have to look for signs that something is wrong. Night terrors is a definite. Don't ignore the kid or think they are displaying "bad" behavior. Something is wrong. Be the adult and figure it the fuck out.
 Quoting: MissCleo


So true.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76984449


And interesting about kids not being able to verbalize until around 12. Didn’t know that.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76984449


Usually around 12 they develop original thought and ability to form adult conversation. Before that they copy, respond, cry and other forms of communication. We have to listen not just to words.
 Quoting: MissCleo


yet I had original thought and capacity before age 6

even got me into trouble

when I was 5 I decided to piss in the bathtub instead of the toilet because it wouldn't make any noise and thus not wake anyone up

got my ass beat for that because dad didn't believe me when I told him that I pissed in the tub because I didn't want to wake anyone up with my pissing and flushing the toilet as
I thought it would be too loud
(°ö°)
Swirl Life
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 73809806
United States
02/05/2020 05:52 PM
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Re: The situation
Do you maturbate furiously to violent porn?? I think we know the answer is yes.
0000001  (OP)
Viscous

User ID: 28401720
United Kingdom
02/05/2020 06:11 PM

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Re: The situation
Give me a week and I'll be an arsehole again.
 Quoting: 0000001


don't be an arsehole. lol
 Quoting: MissCleo


It's funny when I'm an arse ha

I've got my mojo back now I reckon
Thats the last time you call me Peter sweetknees dobson.
0000001  (OP)
Viscous

User ID: 28401720
United Kingdom
02/05/2020 06:11 PM

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Re: The situation
Do you maturbate furiously to violent porn?? I think we know the answer is yes.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 73809806


Not as often as I would like
Thats the last time you call me Peter sweetknees dobson.
ayr phorce yuan

User ID: 78416597
United Kingdom
02/05/2020 06:43 PM

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Re: The situation
Do you maturbate furiously to violent porn?? I think we know the answer is yes.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 73809806


Not as often as I would like
 Quoting: 0000001


Lol. Looks like the ‘repair job’ is coming along.
GLP alert level 2; "Go get a hard hat:.

GLP alert level 1; "Put the fucking hat on:.
Legna Angel
The Backwards Angel

User ID: 52578797
United States
02/05/2020 06:44 PM

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Re: The situation
good just blast tunes,

entertain good thoughts.

think of the pro's of the situation.

think of your kids!

a new day awaits
 Quoting: Plato II


im really missing my kids at the moment


jay
 Quoting: 0000001


It’s your fault. You could have made the marriage work but you didn’t. Now these children have a broken home. No dad in the home is awful.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 76984449


I know.

But i wouldn't put all the blame on me.
 Quoting: 0000001


Hit me up on tinder LMAO j/k

made ya smile hf
Legna Angel,

It’s been Real, it’s been Nice, but I can’t say it’s been Real Nice!

end sheepgives chickenwasntme
Bodhi Sita

User ID: 77930780
United States
02/05/2020 06:51 PM

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Re: The situation
See... a woman usually pulls the weight in a marriage. And a man doesn't bring 100%. happens with age.

So she doesn't need you. Unless you are 100% a person and giving that to the relationship.

Truth shouldn't offend anyone. Be honest with her.
 Quoting: MissCleo


nope

when you demand all this 100% bullshit you lock your own mind and heart
with, assumptions, accusations, judgment, condemnation, grudges, bitterness, offenses, and resentment

no one is ever 100%

and it's never to be about owing, earning, demanding, etc.

it always has to be about freedoms
freely sharing all things together
giving out of oneself without expectation of return

if / when I do something for someone, it's because I want to,
not because I have to, or because I'm looking for something in return

as soon as one or the other assumes it's about owing, or earning,
or someone is assuming the other is being demanding

then it moves from freedoms and real
to totally performance based fakery

never do this, it's destructive

never demand 100% no one can meet this outrageous expectation of performance perfection
 Quoting: Red John


Really good point!

Expectations are a slow death of any relationship.

Gratitude and appreciation are what is needed.
~Bodhi
Bodhi Sita

User ID: 77930780
United States
02/05/2020 06:52 PM

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Re: The situation
OP
Go take your kids out for dinner and a movie or something.

It is important to see them as often as possible. They are freaking out too.
~Bodhi
Lady Boy George Foreman Grill

User ID: 77980885
02/05/2020 10:49 PM

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Re: The situation
Gutted for you mate, but you’ve got some great advice from a few people who really know what they’re talking about.

I’d like to quote the ones you really should be taking heed of, though I’m sure you know which comments resonate with you and your situation.

Awesome to read you’re gonna fight to win her back.

I know you know why this has happened, just as I know you know what is required for you to correct the situation. WHATEVER IT TAKES JUST DO IT!

The most important thing that I know you know you need to do right now is
to give up the dope, at least for the foreseeable future

Honestly mate, give up the pot and spend time with her and her family (they’re your family too bro) show them you see them as your family, regardless of their shortcomings.

Like many here, I like you, and wish the best for you and your family for the future.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 74632481
United States
02/06/2020 01:23 AM
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Re: The situation
I am sorry for the pain you are feeling. Sending hugs.
 Quoting: Happy in Nature


Me, too.

Sending love to you and everyone who is in pain of any kind.

hfhfhfhf
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 78426106
Australia
02/06/2020 01:32 AM
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Re: The situation
dude, you've been given a new lease on life.
Legna Angel
The Backwards Angel

User ID: 72253329
United States
02/06/2020 01:38 AM

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Re: The situation
can I hangout? a lot of chicks here
Legna Angel,

It’s been Real, it’s been Nice, but I can’t say it’s been Real Nice!

end sheepgives chickenwasntme
Lady Boy George Foreman Grill

User ID: 78434148
02/06/2020 01:41 AM

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Re: The situation
can I hangout? a lot of chicks here
 Quoting: Legna Angel


U need to edit your signature ma’am
Jelly

User ID: 78407216
United Kingdom
02/06/2020 01:57 AM

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Re: The situation
Be kind to yourself OP, start building yourself up, for your kids!

D0ITdoIT

Think about what you want in your future, plan for good stuff. All the best OPfighter1

Mindfulness is helpful, helping you to focus
Cymru Am Byth.

^. ^
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¥
~~~

“I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.” Marilyn ...

A heart is not judged by how much you love; but by how much you’re loved by others.

The Wizard of Oz





GLP