| Users Online Now: 1,903 (Who's On?) | Visitors Today: 623,971 | |
| Pageviews Today: 987,752 | Threads Today: 389 | Posts Today: 5,567 |
| 10:46 AM | ||
| Users Online Now: 1,903 (Who's On?) | Visitors Today: 623,971 | |
| Pageviews Today: 987,752 | Threads Today: 389 | Posts Today: 5,567 |
| 10:46 AM | ||
ADVICE NEEDED: My girlfriend refusing to work for 30 days, should I be upset? | |
SoberLife (OP) User ID: 78446523  United States03/23/2020 10:56 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I have an unpopular opinion, but since you asked, I will give it. Quoting: wkk I believe she should be able to stay home if she is scared. As her partner, you should be willing to care for her needs. And at this time, this is her need. Now, I would suggest that you have the right to make sure she is not just using you. If she is telling the truth, her time off should not be time to go out with friends. because if you are going to take a chance of losing things over this decision, then she needs to be honest with you about her reasons. But if she is scared and honest, then you should put her needs first. It is too bad that you are so dependent on both salaries to survive. Hopefully, the money the government has. promised will help you get through the tough spot and you can make decisions that will allow you both more. freedom in the event something happens. :thismm: You're not married, why do both of you have bills together and rely on each other without the commitment? No commitment, no guarantee that each of you would commit to paying said bills. She doesn't want to work out of pure fear, don't expect her to work. I am also in the not popular opinion. I don't think a man should rely on a woman to get the bills paid Being in a relationship is a commitment, we've been together several years. You obviously live in some fantasy 1950's world where one salary supports a family. |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 59310310 United States03/23/2020 10:56 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | :thismm: Quoting: EllenRipley You're not married, why do both of you have bills together and rely on each other without the commitment? No commitment, no guarantee that each of you would commit to paying said bills. She doesn't want to work out of pure fear, don't expect her to work. I am also in the not popular opinion. I don't think a man should rely on a woman to get the bills paid The cost of living is not proportional with income. During my college years I had to live with others in order to have a roof; we shared a 3 bedroom apartment between 6 people at one time. We barely made it. My wife and I moved out of that apartment as boyfriend and girlfriend and were married a couple of years later after I found a job and started pushing to get promotions. She had our daughter, and now we have a home. Don't decry people when you don't know the environment from which they are coming. Makes you look like an ASShole. Does your wife still work? |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 78627170  Australia03/23/2020 10:56 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Lumberghini User ID: 73568822 United States03/23/2020 10:57 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| SoberLife (OP) User ID: 78446523 United States03/23/2020 10:58 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Lumberghini User ID: 73568822 United States03/23/2020 10:59 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Warone User ID: 78504224 United States03/23/2020 10:59 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | She has the opportunity to work, but she refuses to. This is a decision that may ultimately lead to our financial demise. I'm afraid I'm going to lose the house our cars. Quoting: SoberLife I've attempted to speak with her about this on a few occasions, she instantly breaks out crying and it makes a rational conversation impossible. She claims she doesn't want to spread covid to people and be the reason a person dies. How should I react to this? Am I being unsympathetic? Honestly I have no idea what to do right now. I've got less than $1k in the bank. Losing her contribution will destroy us. The "sheep" mentality wants to stop working. I want to be home. Unfortunately im the only one that works. I dont let it get to me. You got to find a way to convince her. Comfy.zone rep |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 78675281 United States03/23/2020 10:59 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Call your mortgage lender and ask for a forbearance, and stop paying the mortgage until she feels it is safe to go back to work. [link to en.wikipedia.org (secure)] |
| SoberLife (OP) User ID: 78446523 United States03/23/2020 11:00 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | :thismm: Quoting: EllenRipley You're not married, why do both of you have bills together and rely on each other without the commitment? No commitment, no guarantee that each of you would commit to paying said bills. She doesn't want to work out of pure fear, don't expect her to work. I am also in the not popular opinion. I don't think a man should rely on a woman to get the bills paid The cost of living is not proportional with income. During my college years I had to live with others in order to have a roof; we shared a 3 bedroom apartment between 6 people at one time. We barely made it. My wife and I moved out of that apartment as boyfriend and girlfriend and were married a couple of years later after I found a job and started pushing to get promotions. She had our daughter, and now we have a home. Don't decry people when you don't know the environment from which they are coming. Makes you look like an ASShole. Does your wife still work? Ever had a wife with a job, or a wife at all? |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 78224306 United States03/23/2020 11:00 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Lumberghini User ID: 73568822 United States03/23/2020 11:00 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | She's refusing to be around anyone. She's already told me she's not going to work for at least 3 more weeks. The reasoning is she doesn't want to become a carrier and then a spreader of the virus. That's the "going excuse" for everyone. They are at home because of protecting others...not because they are scared shitless for themselves. Tell her she needs to figure something out here or GTFO. TRUMP 2020 Willam Barr 2024 |
| silvervega User ID: 73521360 United States03/23/2020 11:01 PM  Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| MisfitToy User ID: 75286834 United States03/23/2020 11:01 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I have an unpopular opinion, but since you asked, I will give it. Quoting: wkk I believe she should be able to stay home if she is scared. As her partner, you should be willing to care for her needs. And at this time, this is her need. Now, I would suggest that you have the right to make sure she is not just using you. If she is telling the truth, her time off should not be time to go out with friends. because if you are going to take a chance of losing things over this decision, then she needs to be honest with you about her reasons. But if she is scared and honest, then you should put her needs first. It is too bad that you are so dependent on both salaries to survive. Hopefully, the money the government has. promised will help you get through the tough spot and you can make decisions that will allow you both more. freedom in the event something happens. Exact opposite here. I want my wife to stay home but she is determined to work. We don't really need the money(for now,) I will be laid off in a few days and I would prefer we just hole-up for a couple of weeks at least. MisfitToy |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 78675121 03/23/2020 11:02 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | She has the opportunity to work, but she refuses to. This is a decision that may ultimately lead to our financial demise. I'm afraid I'm going to lose the house our cars. Quoting: SoberLife I've attempted to speak with her about this on a few occasions, she instantly breaks out crying and it makes a rational conversation impossible. She claims she doesn't want to spread covid to people and be the reason a person dies. How should I react to this? Am I being unsympathetic? Honestly I have no idea what to do right now. I've got less than $1k in the bank. Losing her contribution will destroy us. You guys are a new breed. She is not your wife when it works for you but you want to treat her like a wife when it would work for you. You obviously will get 2 stimilus checks with your non married selves. Quit whining. |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 77983873 United States03/23/2020 11:02 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | That's a "high touch" job in unsafe times. Can she get hired at a grocery stocking for the short term? There are still opportunities if people are willing to be flexible. Does she have parents that are in a position to help with the bills if she will not work at all? |
| Ken4767 User ID: 78601188 United States03/23/2020 11:03 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | If the OP truly loved his girlfriend he would’ve proposed to her. No, I DON’T have much sympathy for his plight. GIVE YOUR GIRLFRIEND A BREAK, dude — reasonable people totally understand her desire not to go to work. You don’t sound like a very serious, supporting, loving guy. I hope she finds a new bf, frankly. |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 78617793 United States03/23/2020 11:04 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Her spreading it to someone shouldn't be a problem if she's a homebody, as you said. If she's washing her hands between clients, and wearing a face mask then everything should be fine. She has a car so she's not taking public transportation - I don't see why she's so worried. |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 67404193 United States03/23/2020 11:04 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 59310310 United States03/23/2020 11:05 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | :thismm: Quoting: EllenRipley You're not married, why do both of you have bills together and rely on each other without the commitment? No commitment, no guarantee that each of you would commit to paying said bills. She doesn't want to work out of pure fear, don't expect her to work. I am also in the not popular opinion. I don't think a man should rely on a woman to get the bills paid The cost of living is not proportional with income. During my college years I had to live with others in order to have a roof; we shared a 3 bedroom apartment between 6 people at one time. We barely made it. My wife and I moved out of that apartment as boyfriend and girlfriend and were married a couple of years later after I found a job and started pushing to get promotions. She had our daughter, and now we have a home. Don't decry people when you don't know the environment from which they are coming. Makes you look like an ASShole. Does your wife still work? Ever had a wife with a job, or a wife at all? I am the wife. I worked up until I had children. I worked when I was single. What's your point? I never had a dude that relied on my paycheck to get bills paid. They either did side jobs or worked overtime or sold shit they had around. That's all I'm saying.  |
| Deplorable Darcy User ID: 78069584 United States03/23/2020 11:06 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | She's a massage therapist? During a plague? To be honest, I'm surprised she's still allowed to work, given the danger of the virus. Hell, I'm surprised people are still getting massages. The virus lingers for 17 days on surfaces. People without symptoms can pass it on. This job strikes me as incredibly dangerous at the moment. Do you have medical insurance? If she gets sick with the virus, you're going to be looking at a lot bigger problems than three weeks of missed wages. To me, it sounds like she's trying to be responsible and has decided that the rewards are not worth the potential risk to herself and to others -- and you. If she gets this virus, you're next. Yikes. Deplorable Darcy |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 78524500  United Kingdom03/23/2020 11:06 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 77812377 United States03/23/2020 11:07 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | So she is very emotional... Quoting: DuckNCover You sure she is not pregnant... If she's only your GF, hope you have things in your name and not jointly... If she's not pregnant, then tell her she's lazy and get to work. Otherwise, find a new GF that will contribute financially to the relationship... This. Drop her before she ruins you both. If she has the opportunity to work right now and isn't jumping at it she'll just be an anchor when you need a strong partner in the coming years. |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 78675121 03/23/2020 11:13 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I have an unpopular opinion, but since you asked, I will give it. Quoting: wkk I believe she should be able to stay home if she is scared. As her partner, you should be willing to care for her needs. And at this time, this is her need. Now, I would suggest that you have the right to make sure she is not just using you. If she is telling the truth, her time off should not be time to go out with friends. because if you are going to take a chance of losing things over this decision, then she needs to be honest with you about her reasons. But if she is scared and honest, then you should put her needs first. It is too bad that you are so dependent on both salaries to survive. Hopefully, the money the government has. promised will help you get through the tough spot and you can make decisions that will allow you both more. freedom in the event something happens. :thismm: You're not married, why do both of you have bills together and rely on each other without the commitment? No commitment, no guarantee that each of you would commit to paying said bills. She doesn't want to work out of pure fear, don't expect her to work. I am also in the not popular opinion. I don't think a man should rely on a woman to get the bills paid Being in a relationship is a commitment, we've been together several years. You obviously live in some fantasy 1950's world where one salary supports a family. Your avatar says more then this thread lol. No pun intended. She is your "roomate" who you use as a friend with benefits(sexual). Tell her just come uo with her half the rent. She will probably pawn or max out a credit or call parents. But beware you were not her husband when beyonce song lyrics ring true. |
| Magnus74 User ID: 77070158 United States03/23/2020 11:14 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | She's refusing to be around anyone. She's already told me she's not going to work for at least 3 more weeks. The reasoning is she doesn't want to become a carrier and then a spreader of the virus. Sounds like you are sitting on a gold mine to me.... Here is what you do- have her put on a masks and have her do her job in the nude with some oiled up chick and video tape it. Your money worries are over bud. |
| TGus User ID: 77715172 United States03/23/2020 11:15 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 77376498 United States03/23/2020 11:17 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 78675121 03/23/2020 11:18 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ... Quoting: Anonymous Coward 77425580 The cost of living is not proportional with income. During my college years I had to live with others in order to have a roof; we shared a 3 bedroom apartment between 6 people at one time. We barely made it. My wife and I moved out of that apartment as boyfriend and girlfriend and were married a couple of years later after I found a job and started pushing to get promotions. She had our daughter, and now we have a home. Don't decry people when you don't know the environment from which they are coming. Makes you look like an ASShole. Does your wife still work? Ever had a wife with a job, or a wife at all? I am the wife. I worked up until I had children. I worked when I was single. What's your point? I never had a dude that relied on my paycheck to get bills paid. They either did side jobs or worked overtime or sold shit they had around. That's all I'm saying. Thank you. Amen. Because these men sure dont want a blah and unpainted toes girlfriend but then want security too. |
| jkm1864 User ID: 77810344 United States03/23/2020 11:19 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Look one missed house payment is not going to kill Your credit score or won't cause Your house to go into default. The utility companies won't shut off services until You have missed two bills so You do have some wiggle room. If You really love Her then just deal with it and let Her have Her 30 days. Now just make sure You get extra sex out of the deal so both parties can be happy. As far as another poster I would have Her take a pregnancy test because generally when a woman gets like that its because they are pregnant. Pussy Grabber Extraordinaire |
| Anonymous Coward User ID: 78675121 03/23/2020 11:19 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
| Judethz User ID: 75895360 United Kingdom03/23/2020 11:21 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
That's a bad job in the present circumstances.