as i see you, there are three of you. one circa 2012, very open. one circa post 2012, very defensive after some brutal attacks. and one post 2019, trying to reemerge. the totality of the three is a woman in her own right, trying to merge aspects that are profoundly eclectic.

it is difficult sometimes to reconcile such disparities not only for yourself but for others. they often don't know which person will respond. the response came before i even entered the thread, admittedly my joke was "off color", i hadn't taken the time to review your posts. regardless, my point is that not knowing which aspect of you will respond, makes people guarded and less open around you. that's not me! lol.

i take my chances and trust that you will recognize which mood i am in, a joking or a serious frame of mind. my frame of mind prior to entering the thread was foolhardy! lol
my apologies for jumping in without looking.