Song idea

Not bad.


Needs more empty space and variance.

1st: I didnt know you did this stuff..cool!

2nd: What DAW are you using?

3rd: did you bus the compression? sounds a bit too squished.

4th:

Professional musician here.I am going to be honest ...
Been at it for decades.
Not everything is a success ..
This doesn't feel appealing to me, it's to herky jerky. And not understated in a good way
The rythm almost makes me queasy ..
Honestly I would go back to th drawing board.
Your tone and set up is fine.
The chord progression is not breaking new ground, it its fine for a template for structuring.
I would add some dynamics, .
Think of it this way you need a context of emotion. What is the idea of what the idea wants to be ?
You want a journey ..

I will give you my formula
Once you have the basic chord progression, just improv over a backing track endlessly, singing, playing , whatever your method.
As the melody forms , you may reharomonize your song, I.e change chords, stack harmonies etc. while keeping the melodic note.
This might lead to more melody change. Etc..
Rinse repeat.
Don't even think of rythm yet.
Now decide how much tension you want in your song.
This is very important as it leads to resolve.
I would think within this genre you can get away with a lot of tension.
I.e dimisnhed chirds, altered chords, etc. which conversely can lead to some beautiful resolve
this will lead you to further clarify your melody, and or solos .
For example , I love using altered scales over half diminished 7 chords , things like this. How much tension you want should guide your melodic construction.
Now move to rhythm.
You want something thathelps people feel what you want to express.
In the end your job is to construct a mirror people can feel themselves in.

Now forget everything I just wrote and make music that expresses something emotively.

Imho you need some work....keep at it you will get there.it is very rewarding.
the best way is to stand on The shoulders of greats, learn basic theory, practice with backing tracks, and constantly compose music.

Professional musician here.I am going to be honest ...I hope you read this to the end because I am offering advice
Been at it for decades.
Not everything is a success ..
This doesn't feel appealing to me, it's to herky jerky. And not understated in a good way
The rythm almost makes me queasy ..
Honestly I would go back to th drawing board.
Your tone and set up is fine.
The chord progression is not breaking new ground, it its fine for a template for structuring.
I would add some dynamics, .
Think of it this way you need a context of emotion. What is the idea of what the idea wants to be ?
You want a journey ..

I will give you my formula...surround yourself with good musicians if possible number one.
Go to open Mics, poetry readings, meet artists , some with skill who are open to free teaching and jamming if they enjoy your company

Back to the song writing methods ....
Once you have the basic chord progression, just improv over a backing track endlessly, singing, playing , whatever your method.
As the melody forms , you may reharomonize your song, I.e change chords, stack harmonies etc. while keeping the melodic note.
This might lead to more melody change. Etc..
Rinse repeat.
Don't even think of rythm yet.( beyond the basic meter, unless of course the song is polyrhythmic in nature )
Now decide how much tension you want in your song.
This is very important as it leads to resolve.
I would think within this genre you can get away with a lot of tension.
I.e dimisnhed chirds, altered chords, etc. which conversely can lead to some beautiful resolve
this will lead you to further clarify your melody, and or solos .
For example , I love using altered scales over half diminished 7 chords , things like this. How much tension you want should guide your melodic construction.
Now move to rhythm.
You want something thathelps people feel what you want to express.
In the end your job is to construct a mirror people can feel themselves in.

NOW FORGET EVERYTHING I JUST WROTE AND COMPOSE SOMETHING ENGAGES PEOPLE EMOTIONALLY ...
Good music should be cathartic

Imho you need some work....keep at it you will get there.it is very rewarding.
the best way is to stand on The shoulders of greats, learn basic theory, practice with backing tracks, and constantly compose music.

I appreciate your input!

Thanks for taking the time.

Tbh there's not a single chord played in this track lol

literally

It's just 4 guitars playing single notes

No wait, for like 2 seconds there are some quick minor chord stabs.

Lol...

Well stacking single notes stil makes chords.
But I get your point

Yeah but my notes are panned all crazy!

Tbh I think it needs double bass pedal and perhaps a lot of it.

Yeah ....imho ..the Pan is a little disorientating ... maybe reel that in

I'd keep playing with the mix.
Yeah double bass drums also could add that feel it needs

Sometimes a song doesn't feel right, but when you plug the perfect counterpoint to it, it works

Are you a Lydian, or Phrygian kinda guy?

Are you a Lydian, or Phrygian kinda guy?

More of a Super locrian !!!!!
Ah but I like Phrygian to .

I'm using Ableton 11.

Yes, on my master I'm using an API 2500 with about 1-3 db on the loudest parts 4:1, and then a Fairchild 670 with less than a db on it.

I AM using a distressor on the guitars and a few tape sims... so theres a ton of compression all around in small increments.

I'll keep it in mind, I don't want to ruin the dynamics but I also want that sound of the compressors lol.

It's a fine line.

awesome man keep it up.

Professional musician here.I am going to be honest ...I hope you read this to the end because I am offering advice
Been at it for decades.
Not everything is a success ..
This doesn't feel appealing to me, it's to herky jerky. And not understated in a good way
The rythm almost makes me queasy ..
Honestly I would go back to th drawing board.
Your tone and set up is fine.
The chord progression is not breaking new ground, it its fine for a template for structuring.
I would add some dynamics, .
Think of it this way you need a context of emotion. What is the idea of what the idea wants to be ?
You want a journey ..

I will give you my formula...surround yourself with good musicians if possible number one.



Once you have the basic chord progression, just improv over a backing track endlessly, singing, playing , whatever your method.
As the melody forms , you may reharomonize your song, I.e change chords, stack harmonies etc. while keeping the melodic note.
This might lead to more melody change. Etc..
Rinse repeat.
Don't even think of rythm yet.( beyond the basic meter, unless of course the song is polyrhythmic in nature )
Now decide how much tension you want in your song.
This is very important as it leads to resolve.
I would think within this genre you can get away with a lot of tension.
I.e dimisnhed chirds, altered chords, etc. which conversely can lead to some beautiful resolve
this will lead you to further clarify your melody, and or solos .
For example , I love using altered scales over half diminished 7 chords , things like this. How much tension you want should guide your melodic construction.
Now move to rhythm.
You want something thathelps people feel what you want to express.
In the end your job is to construct a mirror people can feel themselves in.

Now forget everything I just wrote and make music that expresses something emotively.

Imho you need some work....keep at it you will get there.it is very rewarding.
the best way is to stand on The shoulders of greats, learn basic theory, practice with backing tracks, and constantly compose music.