Crazy people supposedly don't know they are crazy. Do depressed people know they are depressed? Or is the world just total shit?

Asking myself this lately. Not sure if it is the obvious shit that the globalists are doing to bring in the NWO. Not sure if it is just being 43. Not sure if it is just realizing more and more that life is utterly pointless no matter what anyone says or does.

I find myself just totally numb to everything lately. Sex seems totally stupid. I feel bad for all kids because of this ridiculous world they will be inheriting. I try to think of worthwhile pursuits but I seriously have just realized how it all ends, the same everytime.

I realize this may be actual depression, and that I am unable to really see it because I am depressed. It isn't that I wish anything bad on anyone. I wish everyone well. But alot of the time I will daydream while driving that a nuke goes off in the distance. And in my mind I think...that is better than what is coming for the world in the near future.

I don't know. Maybe I need to start drinking again.