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The Witches thread

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 81891861
United States
07/20/2022 04:50 PM
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Re: The Witches thread
I have Witch credentials. I have a wart on my nose. Yes I do.
Anonymous Coward
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07/20/2022 05:43 PM
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Re: The Witches thread
Has Zovalex turned his spare bedroom into a meth lab?
Zovalex

User ID: 80274554
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07/21/2022 12:19 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
.
Has Zovalex turned his spare bedroom into a meth lab?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 83551827


Does my spare bedroom LOOK like a meth lab to you…?

.
https://imgur.com/a/TZqLvSy

“Mental slavery is the worst form of slavery.
It gives you the illusion of freedom,
makes you trust, love, and defend your oppressor,
while making an enemy of those
who are trying to free you or open your eyes.”
-Fiyah

“None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.”
-Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“You have been programmed to resist the very person that is here to set you free, from the prison of your Mind... You are not free... everything you are has been manufactured by Minds that have not your best interest. You are imprisoned by beliefs and not reality. Religions are mental programs to imprison your Mind.”

-SOL
The_Gardener

User ID: 82848892
United States
07/21/2022 12:53 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
.
Has Zovalex turned his spare bedroom into a meth lab?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 83551827


Does my spare bedroom LOOK like a meth lab to you…?

.
https://imgur.com/a/TZqLvSy

 Quoting: Zovalex


Is that the home pedo chamber?
Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
Zovalex

User ID: 80274554
United States
07/21/2022 12:59 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
.
Witches are wild ones.

They require restraints.

…and punishment.

.
“Mental slavery is the worst form of slavery.
It gives you the illusion of freedom,
makes you trust, love, and defend your oppressor,
while making an enemy of those
who are trying to free you or open your eyes.”
-Fiyah

“None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.”
-Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“You have been programmed to resist the very person that is here to set you free, from the prison of your Mind... You are not free... everything you are has been manufactured by Minds that have not your best interest. You are imprisoned by beliefs and not reality. Religions are mental programs to imprison your Mind.”

-SOL
The_Gardener

User ID: 82848892
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07/21/2022 01:01 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
.
Witches are wild ones.

They require restraints.

…and punishment.

.
 Quoting: Zovalex


I couldn't agree more and will work to make that happen.
Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
The_Gardener

User ID: 82848892
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07/21/2022 01:08 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
Where ma witches be at?

Y'all bein all quiet and cloistered out there.

Must be hard times with this Babylon collapse on. Lol.


Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
The_Gardener

User ID: 80640554
07/21/2022 01:26 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
Speaking of binding in chains, I especially liked the Anglo-Saxon metrical rendering of Psalm 149. It has its origins at least from the 7th century. It may in fact be the earliest metrical Psalter we possess.

Psalm 149

6 Gladshipes of God in throte of tha,
Gripinges of swerde in thair hende als-swa;

7 In birthes wrekes for to do,
Snibbinges in ma folk thar-to;

8 To binde thair kinges in fote-festenes
And thair worthi in iren festeles.

9 Dome writen in tham, that do thai;
Blisse this es to all his haleghs ai.


https://imgur.com/a/HBEmoBo


https://imgur.com/a/gXxqzLY


Last Edited by The_Gardener on 07/21/2022 01:28 AM
Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
Green Witch
Pythonissam Vita

User ID: 80856853
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07/21/2022 01:29 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
Speaking of binding in chains, I especially liked the Anglo-Saxon metrical rendering of Psalm 149. It has its origins at least from the 7th century. It may in fact be the earliest metrical Psalter we possess.

Psalm 149

6 Gladshipes of God in throte of tha,
Gripinges of swerde in thair hende als-swa;

7 In birthes wrekes for to do,
Snibbinges in ma folk thar-to;

8 To binde thair kinges in fote-festenes
And thair worthi in iren festeles.

9 Dome writen in tham, that do thai;
Blisse this es to all his haleghs ai.


https://imgur.com/a/HBEmoBo

 Quoting: The_Gardener


You know, you can come hang out with us on my thread. We don't bite. Well... that's not entirely true but still.
banner5
"The smart wolves hide among the sheep. The really smart wolves become the shepherds"
Vafþrúðnir

User ID: 80095455
07/21/2022 01:33 AM
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Re: The Witches thread
Every Night and every Morn
Some to Misery are born.
Every Morn and every Night
Some are born to Sweet Delight,
Some are born to Endless Night.
Some are born to Endless Night.

--Blake

 Quoting: The_Gardener


chuckle

You've been paying attention, eh?

Well done.
The_Gardener

User ID: 80640554
07/21/2022 01:39 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
Speaking of binding in chains, I especially liked the Anglo-Saxon metrical rendering of Psalm 149. It has its origins at least from the 7th century. It may in fact be the earliest metrical Psalter we possess.

Psalm 149

6 Gladshipes of God in throte of tha,
Gripinges of swerde in thair hende als-swa;

7 In birthes wrekes for to do,
Snibbinges in ma folk thar-to;

8 To binde thair kinges in fote-festenes
And thair worthi in iren festeles.

9 Dome writen in tham, that do thai;
Blisse this es to all his haleghs ai.


https://imgur.com/a/HBEmoBo

 Quoting: The_Gardener


You know, you can come hang out with us on my thread. We don't bite. Well... that's not entirely true but still.
 Quoting: Green Witch


Why would I want to hang out with godless, empty scum of the earth who are the chaff I'm blowing away?

:-)
Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
The_Gardener

User ID: 80640554
07/21/2022 01:43 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
Every Night and every Morn
Some to Misery are born.
Every Morn and every Night
Some are born to Sweet Delight,
Some are born to Endless Night.
Some are born to Endless Night.

--Blake

 Quoting: The_Gardener


chuckle

You've been paying attention, eh?

Well done.
 Quoting: Vafþrúðnir


Kinda. :-)

Jeremiah 51

1Thus saith the LORD; Behold, I raise up against Babylon, and against them that dwell in the midst of them that rose up against me, the destroying wind;

2And will send unto Babylon the fanners, that shall winnow her, and shall turn her land into nothingness: for in the day of her chaos they shall be found against her round about.


https://imgur.com/a/iV3Xzbn


Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
Zovalex

User ID: 80274554
United States
07/21/2022 01:58 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
.
Why would I want to hang out with godless, empty scum of the earth who are the chaff I'm blowing away?

:-)
 Quoting: The_Gardener


G-Dub, Silas struggles to express affection.

I assure you these are terms of endearment he is voicing.

chuckle

.
“Mental slavery is the worst form of slavery.
It gives you the illusion of freedom,
makes you trust, love, and defend your oppressor,
while making an enemy of those
who are trying to free you or open your eyes.”
-Fiyah

“None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.”
-Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“You have been programmed to resist the very person that is here to set you free, from the prison of your Mind... You are not free... everything you are has been manufactured by Minds that have not your best interest. You are imprisoned by beliefs and not reality. Religions are mental programs to imprison your Mind.”

-SOL
-Adamant-

User ID: 83876771
07/21/2022 02:00 AM
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Re: The Witches thread
About as Gonzo as GLP will ever get.

popcorn
Vafþrúðnir

User ID: 80095455
07/21/2022 02:01 AM
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Re: The Witches thread
Most don't know the poetry.


[link to www.youtube.com (secure)]
The_Gardener

User ID: 82848892
United States
07/21/2022 02:04 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
I noticed the dyke passive agressive Seattle hipster has graduated from putting plant crap into a jar to putting medicinal plant crap in a jar.

Let's see what she has for us this week.

I see she finally lost the black Goth Killstar witch hat.



Last Edited by The_Gardener on 07/21/2022 02:06 AM
Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
The_Gardener

User ID: 80318290
07/21/2022 02:42 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
Sedna Woo has the best hats.

I cannot overstate the importance of a quality hat.

If you don't have a great hat, what use are you?

None, that's what.

I have no idea what she's jibbering on about, but she has quality hats.


Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
Ty_
Veneficus Vita

User ID: 81771374
Australia
07/21/2022 02:58 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
SimpleLad
Vitam Aeternam Per Virtutem Veritas
The_Gardener

User ID: 80318290
07/21/2022 03:09 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
Now, if you want to catch a lover you need a love spell.

This is a real Salem witch (as opposed to a fake Salem witch). I could tell she was a real Salem witch by that absurd Bostonian accent.

Now, what you need is red candles, some flowers and crap in a jar, an apple and honey, and a knife.

Then you pour some crap in a jar with the honey over the apple and write love and lust on the candle and then burn that crap.

And that's how you can have love.

Oh, and you need copious amounts of flash powder to make it go poof. Otherwise it's not majyc.



Last Edited by The_Gardener on 07/21/2022 03:11 AM
Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
The_Gardener

User ID: 80318290
07/21/2022 04:02 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
If you're a beginner to the Craft, there's some crap you need to get you started.

You need to be fat, first of all. It really helps with the whole aesthetic. Then you need a name like Loralee because that sounds Celtic and you can tell everyone you're hereditary and over 500 years old.

You also need to have bad hair highlights with roots showing. You can have radioactive green, or dyke blue and pink, or your standard bleach blonde with grey. Anything as long as it looks like crap.

Then you need a pentagram thing to have a pentagram. It doesn't matter what it means. The important thing is not to actually know what you're doing, but to convince morons that you're wise when you're actually a complete moron.

Then you need a candle and a witch knife from some new age curio.

Then you need a cheap Hobby Lobby table, or something from Goodwill that you call an altar. It's one piece of crap altar, but we'll call it an altar anyway, because if you're going full retard anyway, who cares?

Then you need to say Lord and Lady a lot. It doesn't matter which Lord and Lady because you don't really care anyway. As long as you have some standard Lord and Lady, you're all groovy cool.

And that's about it. Now you're a witch and can start putting crap in a jar and keeping around the house with your black cat.



Last Edited by The_Gardener on 07/21/2022 04:08 AM
Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
The_Gardener

User ID: 80318290
07/21/2022 04:23 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
As a witch, your animal familiar pets are important. For example, if your dog Spot ends up passing on, you'll probably want to burn him to ashes and then stick him in a sacred urn to place on your altar beside grandma and grandpa.

If you remember nothing else about being a witch, the most important principle you can ever learn is to be sure to buy plenty of jars. Because you are going to be using more jars than you can imagine.



Last Edited by The_Gardener on 07/21/2022 05:03 AM
Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
The_Gardener

User ID: 80318290
07/21/2022 04:50 AM

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Re: The Witches thread
First rule of all witchcraft is this:

There is absolutely no difference in ability or power in a beginner witch and a witch who has been a witch for 40 years.

None.

Nada.

As in absolutely no difference.

A witch will never know anymore than she does when she first begins because she never knew anything to start with and never will.

If a witch lived 1000 years, she would be every bit as retarded as the day she first began.

Witchcraft is nothing more or less than variations on the theme of putting crap in a jar, or taking crap out of a jar. That's all.

So, the beginner should feel confident because she knows that she is absolutely the best she will ever be and knows as much as she will ever know - absolutely nothing.

Last Edited by The_Gardener on 07/21/2022 04:54 AM
Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 81901366
United States
07/21/2022 12:27 PM
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Re: The Witches thread
.
Has Zovalex turned his spare bedroom into a meth lab?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 83551827


Does my spare bedroom LOOK like a meth lab to you…?

.
[imgur] [link to imgur.com (secure)]
 Quoting: Zovalex


OK then, thats a normal spare bedroom. I was thinking that you were strange.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 81901366
United States
07/21/2022 01:38 PM
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Re: The Witches thread
So, Witch`s corner celebrates 1000 pages, but us AC`s were left out. Its OK were not hurt. We will just stay over here om our 7 pages.
The_Gardener

User ID: 80313899
07/21/2022 01:59 PM

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Re: The Witches thread
Let's see...next up we'll need to start a discussion on the super secret and ancient spiral dance. That's important.


Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
The_Gardener

User ID: 80313899
07/21/2022 02:15 PM

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Re: The Witches thread
Lizzy gives us the d/l on Silver Ravenwolf. She was like 15 when she made this video, so she knows a lot more than most witches out there because the longer a witch progresses along her path, the dumber she gets.

Always find a 14 or 15 year old girl to explain the finer points of the Craft to you because she's the only one who knows this stuff. All the old crones are retards.

Ok, Lizzy, what you got...


Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83879963
United States
07/21/2022 03:09 PM
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Re: The Witches thread
Let's see...next up we'll need to start a discussion on the super secret and ancient spiral dance. That's important.


 Quoting: The_Gardener


People who do yoga fart a lot doing it. THis should be the same, and it is! you can hear repeated farting during the first dancer.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83879963
United States
07/21/2022 03:26 PM
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Re: The Witches thread
This is the Green Witch.

She's a dyke who used to live in some backwater from like South Carolina or something.

She decided she was a witch and liked plants. Ergo, the fairies told her she must be a witch.

I've watched several of her useless videos on YouTube.

Now she lives in Seattle with her girlfriend and cut her hair like Peter Pan, though it's growing out again.

She's been feeling bad because she hasn't been "authentic" with her feelings about coming out of the closet on being a carpet muncher and a Vegan.

Now she's "moving forward" with the "craft" (whatever garbage she could put together from a ten minute internet search).

Is this the kind of witch you are, OP?

She doesn't actually do anything but mix up some crap in some Hobby Lobby bottles and collect a Google Ads dividend cheque. That's literally the sum total of her career and job description. And, yet, she still complains on her videos about nothing.



 Quoting: The_Gardener


Well I am sorry but I just think that the Lady in the video is nice.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83880160
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07/21/2022 03:30 PM
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Re: The Witches thread
So, Witch`s corner celebrates 1000 pages, but us AC`s were left out. Its OK were not hurt. We will just stay over here om our 7 pages.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 81901366


Were coming up to page 10, be proud.
The_Gardener

User ID: 80313899
07/21/2022 03:41 PM

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Re: The Witches thread
This is the Green Witch.

She's a dyke who used to live in some backwater from like South Carolina or something.

She decided she was a witch and liked plants. Ergo, the fairies told her she must be a witch.

I've watched several of her useless videos on YouTube.

Now she lives in Seattle with her girlfriend and cut her hair like Peter Pan, though it's growing out again.

She's been feeling bad because she hasn't been "authentic" with her feelings about coming out of the closet on being a carpet muncher and a Vegan.

Now she's "moving forward" with the "craft" (whatever garbage she could put together from a ten minute internet search).

Is this the kind of witch you are, OP?

She doesn't actually do anything but mix up some crap in some Hobby Lobby bottles and collect a Google Ads dividend cheque. That's literally the sum total of her career and job description. And, yet, she still complains on her videos about nothing.



 Quoting: The_Gardener


Well I am sorry but I just think that the Lady in the video is nice.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 83879963


Yeah, I know. That's what you're supposed to think.

That's her whole YouTube vamp.

"Oh, she's so nice and sweet while putting crap in jars. And now she wants to put medicinal crap in a jar to save mother Gaia and her earth children."

What she actually is is a revolting, godless passive agressive raging dyke muff licker.

:-)

Last Edited by The_Gardener on 07/21/2022 03:43 PM
Who is a liar more than one who denies that Jesus is the Messiah?
One who denies the Father and the Son is antichrist.
Whosoever denies the Son does not have not the Father, either. - 1 John 2:22-23

Daily Prayer & Scripture Reading [link to www.parishprayer.org (secure)]





GLP