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Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !

 
Assended Master

User ID: 86035427
United States
09/18/2023 02:17 PM

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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Even Jesus would have kicked his ass out
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 85302520
United States
09/18/2023 02:22 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Piss off OP


TAKE YOUR WHINING ASS SOMEWHERE ELSE.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86313691
France
09/18/2023 02:27 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
This can't go on OP. The situation is making everyone unhappy and threatening your marriage.

Although, as a Christian leaving your wife should NOT be on your mind.

You are the head of your household. Your FIL is your guest. He must conform to your rules and fit in with you - not the other way around.

It's time to calmly have a conversation with him.

Tell him your conditions are non negotiable. He either toes the line so you can have peace in your home and your family or he leaves.

No if's. No Buts.

Tell him he is welcome in your home. That you're more than willing to help him as he ages. But this is your home and you won't be pushed to the side.

Pray and ask the Lord for His guidance. Ask God to strengthen your patience and give you wisdom to deal with the situation.

Good luck to you. Old people can be difficult, but we'll all be old one day and dependent on our loved ones and their patience and understanding.

I hope you find a better home than your current one too.

God bless you.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 76367190
United States
09/18/2023 02:35 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Where is the black hooker he was supporting? Why can’t he live with her?

Tell her he’s almost 90 and can’t get it up anymore. All she has to do is cuddle with him once in awhile for 3K/mo.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86271536
United States
09/18/2023 02:38 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Grawmps and the Black hooker r doin it up
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 77974323
United Kingdom
09/18/2023 02:39 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Whatever happens, make sure you and your lady stay on the same side, else he'll wedge right in there like an axe blade...then he'll be gone, but the rift will remain.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 86054941


yup. shit like this destroys peoples lives.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83962627
United States
09/18/2023 07:02 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Wow. I won't bother to bitch about my life anymore. Those sound like some pretty bad living conditions you've found yourself in.

Inlaws....yet another reason to never get married.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 85404198


Marry someone who has no parents or kids.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83962627
United States
09/18/2023 07:06 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
He still is a sprite old man . Eats 3 meals a day . Gets around and moans about it . He is content to watch TV 18 hours a day and sit in my recliner .

I am pushing the 2 bedroom and we bounce across the grass .

It's that or NOTHING .

I'll call my 45 year old pastor and have him quote the wife on how taking your Father in can ruin your marriage . he will be closely monitored if he lives alon and has a 9-11 bracelet if he falls .

My own father is also living alone in a beautiful ranch home .

he can barely walk to .

Her dad HAD NO OPTIONS and finally agreed to come here . We spent 900 bucks fetching his ass !
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 84906173


This sounds very reasonable. Get the pastor involved. According to the Bible you are the head of the household and make the final decisions. Her dad needs his own place and your daughter needs a decent room. He will live right next door. This will save your marriage. If she doesn’t go along with this she is going against you and God’s marriage arrangement. She won’t have God’s backing if she rebels.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83962627
United States
09/18/2023 07:07 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Sit your wife down somewhere that’s free from distractions, and at a time when you have lots of time to come to a solution. Explain calmly, without cutting her dad down too much, that you need your life back. That you are at the end of your rope. I know you admire her commitment to her dad but your marriage comes first. Tell her it’s affecting her children negatively and they and you come first.

Honoring your mother and father doesn’t mean you sacrifice your family’s lives for them.

Ask her where she sees this ending, Tell her there has to be a date set for him to leave. Then be silent and let her talk it out.

Honestly, eventually the old man will probably bring the hooker back into his life and into your home.
 Quoting: Square peg


They need to sit down with their pastor.
popsawheelie

User ID: 61153330
United States
09/18/2023 07:16 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Damn, some of you need to be ashamed. I'm pretty hard core but if my MIL need to come live here I would do what needed to be done. He sounds old and chrochity just like I'll prolly be.

Have some compassion OP You're closing in on his age every day. Damn.
I have not yet begun to defile myself

The Fires of time consume all men equally.

I Am Legion
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 74773969
United States
09/18/2023 07:22 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Call the cops, report him as an unwelcome intruder and have him removed and/or arrested.

You move into the other trailer and have the electric and water shut off on the one he's in.

Stop feeding him.

Roofy him and while he's passed out relocate him to elsewhere.
Mental Case
User ID: 79326634
United States
09/18/2023 07:31 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Make his life so miserable he doesn't want to stay.

The TV could meet up with an "accident"...no money for a new one.

His recliner could suddenly break a spring that jabs him in the ass.

Start smoking around him. OFTEN!

There's a million things you could do.

Cook something he can't stand the smell of.

Turn up the music after he goes to sleep.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 72054758
United States
09/18/2023 08:28 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Why does op put a space before each punctuation mark . It looks dumb . No one does this . How did you never learn this was wrong .

Idiots gonna idiot
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 86316555
Canada
09/18/2023 08:37 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
I don’t know the solution. But be extra kind with your wife, she’s vulnerable and I wouldn’t wanna be her right now.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 84906173
09/18/2023 08:44 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
TY for the replies i got good and buzzed today . Even smoked a joint on a federal outpost . Drank the 5th of whiskey about 5 pm . started at 1 pm .
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83962627
United States
09/18/2023 08:44 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Damn, some of you need to be ashamed. I'm pretty hard core but if my MIL need to come live here I would do what needed to be done. He sounds old and chrochity just like I'll prolly be.

Have some compassion OP You're closing in on his age every day. Damn.
 Quoting: popsawheelie


He does have compassion. There is a place next door for dad.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83962627
United States
09/18/2023 08:45 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
TY for the replies i got good and buzzed today . Even smoked a joint on a federal outpost . Drank the 5th of whiskey about 5 pm . started at 1 pm .
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 84906173


Be careful. You may be dead before her dad lol
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 83643513
United States
09/18/2023 09:04 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Yeah
Family...
the gift that keeps on taking.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 80736688
United States
09/18/2023 10:09 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
The old man has Medicare. Life is short and he is now a useless eater. I HATE cigarette smoke but it is YOUR home. Sit down with your wife and put this old man in a retirement facility for the sake of your sanity and your quality of life. Medicare will pay for it.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 79390930
United States
09/18/2023 10:14 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Best advice I can offer.
Carry your asses back up north.
Lion Not Sheep

User ID: 85105937
United States
09/18/2023 10:20 PM

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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
This is such a sad situation, put him in his own trailer, make him use his social security to pay the bills and ask your wife to check on him daily and supply 2 meals per day.

DONE.

The Bible tells us to turn away from our parents and cleave to our partner.

My 2 cents
 Quoting: Loup Garou


thiss

Personally, I would never allowed him to move in.
Truther, no matter how painful it may be initially. Stay the course.

Laugh everyday.

Listen to others, truly listen. Even if it takes you awhile to understand where they are coming from.

Everyone has a life story. Ask someone what theirs is.

Fighter to the core. Never give up, never give in.
AR 15-SPECIALIST
Admit it! We’re Fucked

User ID: 73819153
United States
09/18/2023 10:24 PM

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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Create an O/F account and start off by ass rape’n your father in law..see where it goes from there I guess….

Last Edited by AR 15-SPECIALIST on 09/18/2023 10:24 PM
TRUMPS FAULT
AR 15-SPECIALIST
Admit it! We’re Fucked

User ID: 73819153
United States
09/18/2023 10:24 PM

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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Create an O/F account and start off by ass rape’n your father in law..see where it goes from there I guess….
 Quoting: AR 15-SPECIALIST


You’re welcome :)

Last Edited by AR 15-SPECIALIST on 09/18/2023 10:25 PM
TRUMPS FAULT
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 85010749
United States
09/18/2023 10:36 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
OP,
My 5 foot tall, 300 pound, diabetic mother in law moved into my living room too!


IF HE ENDS UP IN THE HOSPITAL REFUSE TO TAKE HIM BACK. SAY HE IS HOMELESS. STAY FIRM, THE HOSPITAL WILL TRY AND SAY ANYTHING TO GET YOU TO TACK HIM BACK. I DID THIS AND SHE ENDED UP FINE.

GOOD LUCK!hf
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1858636
Canada
09/18/2023 10:36 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
I went through that. It only gets worse. There ended up no where for me to sit in my own living room, i paid for everything, couldn't watch my own television, expected kick my own toddler out of the house cause the father in law didn't like the noise. I was made out to be the bad guy, food wasn't good enough, miserable experience.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 80596940
United States
09/18/2023 10:46 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
Simple. Just get rid of the television.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 84188633
United States
09/18/2023 10:48 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
this is going to be your life. probably until your old. it’s over for you bud.

find a bar. and just hang out there until it’s time to sleep.
pool
I will find you in the bluer

User ID: 86029422
United States
09/18/2023 10:49 PM

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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
TY for the replies i got good and buzzed today . Even smoked a joint on a federal outpost . Drank the 5th of whiskey about 5 pm . started at 1 pm .
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 84906173


And, that's all folks.
Don't pollute yourself with 'diet'.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 85802850
United States
09/18/2023 11:18 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
TRY TO GET THE SON TO TAKE HIM IN AGAIN.

ASK HIM SO SIGN OVER POWER OF ATTORNEY.

GET HIM A CASE WORKER. WORK ON THE OTHER KIDS TO TAKE HIM 2.0.

THEN, WORK ON SOME LOW GRADE 'BANISHMENT' WITCHCRAFT SPELLS.UH
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 79466719
United States
09/18/2023 11:18 PM
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Re: Wife's Father suddenly living with us until his death . I'm Losing it !
I don't really post personal stuff like this but i have no friends here and really not even another grown dude to vent with in person over this shit show .

Wife and I 28 years / 23 married /3 great kids . Sold the store and left NYS 13 years ago to escape NY . Mother in law died same year and that allowed us to LEAVE for good for Eastern NC where I had a job waiting .

I was 46 then . I am now 57 fatter and angrier like most in this nation . I work hard at a trade on the USMC base and wife is with me 24/7 . I do not drive because of a fine in NYS and frankly I could care less about driving . I still drink once or twice a week . Sometimes heavy on a Saturday while i do chores outside or have a hobby to contend with .

The wife and I don't argue and life has been quiet while our kids turned into adults here .


Thats the background .

My Father in Law squandered his Wife's Life insurance on black whores and bad financial decisions and went through
100 Grand in 10 years while living with his daughter for 6 years . The last 4 years with his son . My wife is the youngest of 4 . The other daughter , the oldest doesn't want shit to do with him . None of his grand kids call him . The Daughter he lived with is now in R-wing and has been for months in NYS . The Son had a hissy fit and threw the old man < 86> to the front steps 3 weeks ago and my wife drove up to NYS to get him and bring him here to are 2 bedroom trailer i was forced to rent after our house lease went up $1500.00 on the new lease . We had a 5 bedroom home for 5 years and the old man refused to move in with us then . had he I likely would have a house now with his help with the mortgage . because of housing insanity here in Jacksonville NC I rent 2 trailers to keep my family intact in a trailer park with 4 trailers .



He sits in my living room in a recliner all fucking day with the tv on . I got him head phones because we are not TV people .

My daughter is now displaced and is across the gravel driveway in my Sons trailer , sleeping on the couch because he now has displaced her by taking HER BEDROOM .

He is a passive aggressive man with a 6th grade education and drove a city bus for 25 years . Spent most of his extra $ on lottery tickets and supported his crack head son for 30 years and paid his rent and his own mortgage as they lived in a double up and down in Rochester NY .

The hood came into that area badly and he sold the house , the son moved out with another POS Giant crazy woman and went away . Some time around this time he meets a 30 something black hooker and she takes him for all he is worth . He buys her 2 cars in 10 years and pays the entire shot plus insurance secretly .

He gets caught eventually and plays dumb . Wifes crazy sister and him buy a home together and all is well for 6 years . Again the bl;ack girl comes back and extorts him . Old man and sister move to new house but she has a mental health breakdown and kicks him out for apparently viewing her in bathroom she says . he says he had to piss and she was in there forever . new online husband kicks the oldman out and is collecting the $ of Sister in R wing like a champ .

So now he has to go back to sons house where he was inbetween about a year prior . Son is a 30 year crack head who now drinks JD every night and heavily drinks to black outs on week ends and ignores his father 100 % . The old man now calls my wife to come and get him to live with us .


I smoke , she smokes . We now smoke outside . After 9pm he is in bed and I ventilate trailer and have maybe 2 smokes before 10 . I go to bed .

Wife went out for 1 hour to p/u daughter I had a smoke in the house and he sits literally 6 feet from me . 1` hour later wife is home and he says he's sick . I ask why , was it dinner . he says no , you smoked in the trailer . My trailer that he has taken over .

I smoke bagged pipe tobacco and roll cigs in a loader machine . These are not chemical smokes from the store and they don't stink up the joint unless you have a fuck ton .


Well I lost it on his ass and told him why did you wait 1.5 hours to bitch about it ? That I've tried to accommodate him in our place and that we are in a small trailer due to the fucking brutal economy . I'm debt free btw .

He just makes a passive aggressive face and pouts while my wife scolds me .

So I tried to lay down and call it a night but I'm so pissed off . We all went to church today had a decent day other than being stuck here all day and it rained .

Last Sunday I asked him not to play depressing little house on the prairie because it's so fucking depressing and I said it makes me want to suicide . he yells out Go ahead and Do it . We were home from church less than an hour and I was doing dishes . Wife defends him again . She goes and buys head phones that go in remote . But still he sits here all fucking day . Won't / Can't do dishes or make his own food . Constantly grabs my chair when walking by and i have a bad back .

Throws his piss absorbent underwear pads in the damn bathroom trash can and it stinks to high heaven . he won't tun the air because he is to cold so when I come home from my base jobe in 90 degree heat the trailer is like 80 instead of 70 . Which then I just go lay down in my room and am forced to watch TV and then fall asleep.

My marriage is being impacted really hard right now . i'm ready to fucking split . Get my Driver ID back up and literally go to Vermont to help with the trade work there after all the flooding .

We are attempting to move into the 3 bdroom trailer that recently came up . They want 800 a month for that shit hole .

My father in law squandered all of his outlets to live and $ and used us as his last stop because he knows my wife will not refuse him . She is denying me affection and sex because fucksake she is tired and does everything for all of us and is past menopause .

Her dad is a big dirt bag and has offered to help with the bills . he generates 3g a month . I don't know if I have the fucking patients for all of this . He has changed my life course and is not my problem . He was told and almost moved here when I was riding hi on the hog and he bailed at the last minute due to back biting and negative BS with my asshole BIL .


Any one have advice . I can park him in his bedroom in the next place so we have a living room for my daughter who will be squeezed into a closet type room . This is all laughable with clown world going on . Plus he is a democrat for life . We don't talk about grown up discussions because he has a mind of a child literally . My wife's mother was his caretaker ! He just drove a bus , played all his spare $ on Lotto his entire life . My wife's life sucked as a kid because there was never any fucking money for her and clothes . I really do not like this arrangement and Am doing it because I love my wife to pieces . But I just told her , HE IS FUCKING OUR MARRIAGE UP AND WE DON'T NEED HIM FOR BILL MONEY . I will try not to be an asshole to him tomorrow but I can guarantee i will not be talking to him.

She made him apologize last Sunday and I knew is was all an act . he's a bitter old man afraid to die and taking full advantage of my wife after she begged him for years to move here and he pulled back twice after she made all the arrangements . No one talks any more in the family . The siblings all despise each other .

I disowned my Family 10 years ago . I'm also adopted and my family are demon possessed narcissists . Leaving them was liberating to say the least !

I will read the comments in the morning . At least I got to vent . My wife is literally demanding I change MY LIFE STYLE 100 % to accommodate a depraved old man who squandered a whole bunch of good stuff on a black hooker .

I have not thrown any of this shit out at him but I did say my daughter is on a couch due to him in her room pissing in her mattress !

Fucking shoot me !
 Quoting: John Q. Public 84906173
Try to think of the situation as a sacrifice to the creator. It sounds like it really sucks on many levels. I konw that suffering makes us better people. damn man, just try to do the best you can.





GLP