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FUTURE NEWS HEADLINE AND STORY: The September 2008 congressional bailout plan is in jeopardy. Bailout II now in the works!

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09/26/2008 02:53 PM
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FUTURE NEWS HEADLINE AND STORY: The September 2008 congressional bailout plan is in jeopardy. Bailout II now in the works!
When the September Economic Bailout plan was passed in September 2008 it was hailed by many congressional leaders as bipartisan legislation that would save the world from economic Armageddon. Recent unfolding events however have left many economic pundits scratching their beleaguered heads in dismay at the current economic carnage. One senior ranking house member said ‘off the record it looks more and more like we are going to have to bailout the “September Economic Bailout Plan”.’ ‘The market forces at play today are far more volatile than were anticipated just a short time back’. ‘It is time that we come up with a real solution’.

Quietly being discussed amongst congressional leaders is a Bailout plan for the September Bailout Plan. A senator who requested anonymity stated ‘Bailout II will make the September Economic Bailout look like a picnic in the park. Failure to save the September Economic Bailout Plan would mean financial extinction. We are not talking Financial Armageddon anymore. Financial Armageddon means there are pieced left amongst the ashes of ruin. Today we are facing extinction of the financial markets altogether.’

When pressed for what kind of figures the finance committee was looking at the senator responded ‘my calculator doesn’t go that high. There are market forces at play here that a fluid and dynamic. The playing field changes hourly and the traditional safeguards and safety nets are at best teetering on the ropes and at worst down and out.’

The Secretary of Treasury has been hurriedly seen rushing between both houses of congress in the attempt of gauging congresses willingness toward Bailout II. When the treasury secretary was asked about this recent turn of events the response was short. ‘The American people are resilient and understand the need of sacrifice. Their predecessor generations met this need and I have total faith that this generation will rise to the occasion.’