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Wal-mart Wines

 
Little Star
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User ID: 273434
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02/05/2009 05:44 PM
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Wal-mart Wines
Wal-Mart Wines

Wal-Mart announced that, sometime in 2009, it will begin offering
customers a new discount item. Wal-Mart's own brand of wine. The world's
largest retail chain is rumored to be teaming up with Ernest & Julio Gallo
Winery of Napa to produce the spirits at an affordable price - in the $2
to $5 range.

Wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to put a bottle of Wal-Mart brand
into their shopping carts, but 'there is a market for inexpensive wine,'
said Kathy Micken, Professor of Marketing at University of Arkansas ,
Bentonville. 'However, branding will be very important.' Customer surveys
were conducted to determine the most attractive name for the Wal-Mart wine
brand. The top surveyed names in order of popularity were:

10. Chateau Traileur Parc
9. White Trashfindel
8. Big Red Gulp
7. World Championship Riesling
6. NASCARbernet
5. Chef Boyardeaux
4. Peanut Noir
3. I Can't Believe it's not Vinegar
2. Grape Expectations
1. Nasti Spumante

The beauty of Wal-Mart wine is that it can be served with either white
meat (Possum) or red meat (Squirrel).
Little Star  (OP)

User ID: 273434
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02/05/2009 05:47 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
They are coming out with this just in time for the depression!
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2009 05:50 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
They are coming out with this just in time for the depression!
 Quoting: Little Star
Little Star  (OP)

User ID: 273434
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02/05/2009 05:52 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
I think I will buy some Grape Expectations! lol
aintnomoretime

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02/05/2009 05:52 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
Wal-Mart Wines

3. I Can't Believe it's not Vinegar

1. Nasti Spumante
 Quoting: Little Star

lmao
You can't have a light without a dark to stick it in.
-- Arlo Guthrie
Your friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you.
-- Elbert Hubbard
Little Star  (OP)

User ID: 273434
United States
02/05/2009 05:54 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
Wal-Mart Wines

3. I Can't Believe it's not Vinegar

1. Nasti Spumante

lmao
 Quoting: aintnomoretime

Yea, they have that one ready for congress! They can't tell what is good or bad. lol
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 516120
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02/05/2009 05:55 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
Wal-Mart Wines

3. I Can't Believe it's not Vinegar

1. Nasti Spumante

lmao
 Quoting: aintnomoretime



That one is the best.

I get Charles Scwab at Trader Joe's for 2.99. It's called three buck chuck, and it is very nice, not faboo, but nice. I'll stick to TJ's.
Little Star  (OP)

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02/05/2009 05:58 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
Wal-Mart Wines

3. I Can't Believe it's not Vinegar

1. Nasti Spumante

lmao



That one is the best.

I get Charles Scwab at Trader Joe's for 2.99. It's called three buck chuck, and it is very nice, not faboo, but nice. I'll stick to TJ's.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 516120

With what is going on in the US, I think we all need a little wine, or whining. lol
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 572542
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02/05/2009 06:05 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
I just bought "Oak Leak" Merlot for $2.97 two days ago. The cheapest ever...and to my delight, NOT made in China.
Little Star  (OP)

User ID: 273434
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02/05/2009 06:10 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
I was thinking that someone could enhance Wal-mart's wines for Christians too.

Thought they could come out with "communion crackers" with the words " I am saved by Jesus" written on them. I bet that would make some pastors heads spin. lol
Little Star  (OP)

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02/05/2009 06:18 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
When I go to Wal-mart I like to play around at the store.
Here are some of the things that can be done while shopping at Wal-mart.

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
4. Start playing Calvinball; see how many people you can get to join in.
5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
9. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.
10. Tell an employee in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.
11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10".
12. Play with the automatic doors.
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along.
14. Walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this junk, anyway?"
15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.
16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive."
17. Follow people through the aisles, staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.
18. Play soccer with a group of friend, using the entire store as your playing field.
19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"
20. Put M&M's on layaway.
21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows.
23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.
24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!"
26. Toilet paper as much of the store as possible.
27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down.
29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"
31. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
32. Take bets on the battle described above.
33. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.
34. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
35. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from Mission: Impossible."
36. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
37. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
38. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"
39. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
40. Two words: "Marco Polo."
41. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.
42. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics.
43. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
44. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.
45. During announcements over the PA, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"
46. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
47. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax.
48. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 600833
United States
02/05/2009 06:19 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
screw that, I'm brewing my own wine...
Little Star  (OP)

User ID: 273434
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02/05/2009 06:22 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
screw that, I'm brewing my own wine...
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 600833

It's a joke!
Lawman

User ID: 606228
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02/05/2009 06:24 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
macgun Walmart
`
(Be) Divide(ed) and (be) Conquer(ed)...

Don’t listen to what they say, watch what they do.

~There is Tranquility in Ignorance, but Servitude is its Partner. —me
~What luck for Rulers that Men do not Think. —Adolf Hitler

:damned: Doom is optional. There is good news abounds.
banshee tiger
User ID: 537103
Canada
02/05/2009 06:31 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
Hmmmmm!
Chef Boyardeaux


wine
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 593335
United States
02/05/2009 06:33 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
Absolutely hilarious!! Was this a David Letterman top 10 list? Sooo Funny!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 425325
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02/05/2009 06:35 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
Will have nothing to do with Walmart. The closest one to me is Inglewood, and that's quite a ways away. Hope it stays that way. There is nothing about Walmart that I like.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 608510
United States
02/05/2009 06:39 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
I like my wine in a box. Maybe they could have little to go boxes.
Los_Suorovinrac

User ID: 608539
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02/05/2009 06:49 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
Lowering standards of the taste of wine are they. That shit will be rank. Kmart already has five dollar wine by the big bottle and so does Food Lion so no big deal.
Wine cant go any lower unless was homemade] or will be water.

I guaranteed you all that Walmart will try to be purchasing everyones vineyards as well. Don't allow that to occur.

Since scientific studies have proven that wine ensures immortality or near with the property named Sirtuin -- that lengthens life.

Now that this has been affirmed to all populace the monarchies are extremely jealous and angry and want wine to go extinct. so if you value health don't buy the cheapened of that property walmart wine.
Brother sun, intuition moon. Home at the forest.

Sure every post I have mentions goat blood...How do you think we get plasma tv's?

Organic needs are being assaulted. I'm not amused by this & encourage all to grow heirloom seed for themselves.

The garden gives greatest power.
Diabetes curing food list [Forget the FDA - Think for yourself]:
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DalTheJigsaw

User ID: 606672
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02/05/2009 06:50 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
This is really nasty! This reminds me of beer/wine from the Dollar store...:(
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 540299
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02/05/2009 07:02 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
Not every wine for every meal should be expensive. Still given the fact that cheap cheese now tastes like glue and the FDA doesn't care if we are poisoned, I want to grow my wine.Unfortunately, it will take four years once the vines are planted to produce a wine.
banshee tiger
User ID: 537103
Canada
02/05/2009 07:21 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
How about a nice german, can wine with the pullup tab. They could call it: "WINEHEINEKEN"



cheers
TS
User ID: 683425
United States
12/17/2009 11:57 AM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
off the to do list i choose
#'s 23,44, and 47.
Enaid

User ID: 515273
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12/17/2009 12:29 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
Funny. I hate Walmart.\

---

For good cheap wine - try the Two Buck Chuck at Trader Joe's. Although it is now over $3. The young table red - sucks thou. Avoid that one.
Personal responsibility - try it sometime. Quit blaming others for your bad choices. Consequences happen.

:enaid11:
Zephyr333

User ID: 798487
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12/17/2009 12:32 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
Just what we need. Another 2-buck chuck. wine
"I am searching for the bones of your father but cannot distinguish them from those of a slave." Diogenes

"Some have little power to do good, and have likewise little strength to resist evil" (Samuel Johnson).



"The basic difference between an ordinary man and a warrior is that a warrior takes everything as a challenge, while an ordinary man takes everything as a blessing or as a curse."--Don Juan
Hillcrest

User ID: 392015
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12/17/2009 12:33 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
The Target in my neighborhood has a great wine section... as good as any wine shop.
Water always wins. :sun:
Hillcrest

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12/17/2009 12:36 PM
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Re: Wal-mart Wines
For good cheap wine - try the Two Buck Chuck at Trader Joe's. Although it is now over $3. The young table red - sucks thou. Avoid that one.
 Quoting: Enaid


Trader Joe's is probably the best place to get great wine for cheap... I remember one Xmas I got a bottle of champagne (can't remember the label) for $10 that was as good as any Moet or Piper-Heidsieck (my favorite) and those run btw $40 and $50 or higher
Water always wins. :sun:





GLP