Is this insanity or something else?

I left the prelude part out, because I was almost certain of the conclusion most would take, I can’t blame them I would take the same view. Well then lets continue this story.

Prior to this, I was a 28 year old virgin. I know right, life conspiring against since birth. I met this girl who knew a friend. We hung out one night mostly just talking. The next night I was invited with them to go hot tubing, I declined. The following day we were all hanging out and my friend went to get something from Burger King. I made it about half way into eating the burger before she off handedly mentions that it tastes funny. Prior I had noticed a grey/brown powder with black speckles in it, but passed it off as seasoning. Oh how wrong that assumption was, I thinking it was tetrodotoxin from a salamander, but that’s just a guess from what I’ve read. Several days later I notice some slight bruising on my palms. Bluish/black lines “similar to bruises” started forming on my palms. A pentagram on the left palm and box shaped letter S on the right palm over the next two to three weeks.

I never believed in this stuff really, not that I discounted it’s existence either, but I thought it unlikely. This carried on for a few weeks and almost appeared like a circle was forming around the pentagram. At the same time the bruising was becoming more pronounced. They started taking on the appearance of a shape, one light on the right and one dark on the left. Their appearance started resembling what are refereed to as angles, with wings.

While I may not have put much stock into all this, I had read some material on the subject. Surprisingly a lot of the stuff they taught us in the mentally gifted program at school has helped me greatly. It’s almost as if some of what they taught us was to protect us from this crap. So through either learning or dumb luck I thought of how to break the spell. I recalled most witchcraft of this sort wants blood offerings. So I made some small cuts in the form of crosses to break the spell, using salt to purify the wound. Well it worked, I think. The lines started fading, the figures remain but are more faded. The pentagram and S were replaced with crosses. Another line formed on both hands linking my lifeline with my head and heart, to form an almost perfect 7, mirrored in both hands. Or a Pi symbol, which happens to be my B-day 3.14. I'm fairly certain I'm no more special then anyone else, so don't even go there. And if you were, my reply would be no more then anyone else.

It’s hard for me to forget what has happened. I came to the conclusion long ago it was better to view the whole thing as a lapse in mental stability. And mostly ignore it for now and just live my life. But if anyone has any suggestion I’m open minded, unless it’s go see the doctor. I do like conformation of my ideas, but I really dislike waiting hours to hear what I have already deduced.

Either someone has your mind under some kind of control and is causing you to see hallucinations, or it is some kind of Djinn possession(night mares and succubus push on the breast while sleeping, this sort of reminds me of you spine description). You could seek an exorcist, but I have heard that does not always "cure" the condition. Or, you could just be schizophrenic, you are on GLP after all.

Trust me I've consider the schizophrenic angle, it is possible. But all the evidence I find suggests something else. I hadn't thought of those, I'll have to read up on the subject. Thanks for the tip.

I going to put this up here in case someone in a similar situation runs into this thread. It's still a ruff draft but it's cleaning up some, parts need to be fleshed out a bit better.


If you were in the gifted program in school you’ll recognize a lot of what’s here. As it’s built off what they taught us. If you weren’t that’s fine, I took so much time off. This is my attempt to help make up some of that lost time, it’s simply to help speed up the learning process. So you shouldn’t encounter too much problem following along. Some of you may even want to skip to the second part. As always any input or corrections are welcome. Micasaessucas or in this case, my thoughts are your thoughts.


What if I told you could think of anything you wanted. Do you remember how profound a feeling in a dream can feel? Do you realize that was just a thought? Something you can feel at will. Do you remember when you were the happiest? Can you feel that now? Is it difficult to hold the thought? Are you getting in your own way? Why? Did you know you can tell your subconscious to do things? Do you want to know more?


It’s only a thought

The path to controlling the universe within yourself “your mind” and ultimately the world around you. So often I see someone struggling with an emotion or behavior they have learned from their environment and reinforced through thoughts and actions. Or we search all over for something we can manufacture at will, an emotion, a thought. I’m here to remind you, you may feel what ever you want, whenever you want. Even the most profound feeling you have ever experienced has been just a thought. Remember how profound some dreams can feel, those were just thoughts. Something you can learn to feel at will with a little practice. As thoughts and emotions are tools to be used to help create. Understand, with great power comes great responsibility.

By replacing negative thoughts or emotions (or any thought or emotion) with positive thoughts and emotions. You can train your mind with as little as 2-3 thoughts a day, as simple repetitive thoughts and processes are one of the ways we learn. Also the word “NO” is a strong command word and can be told to yourself to help stop thoughts or behaviors you wish to change, be careful with this one and never be to difficult on yourself. Also if you aren’t at odds with yourself, simply telling your subconscious often works. You can use these techniques and many others to gain new perspectives and even to become a different person over time. If the thoughts feel difficult it’s likely you allowing some outside force to influence you making it difficult, remember it’s just a thought one of easiest things in the world.

Keep in mind what you replace your thoughts with, can shape your future self. What we think is what we see, a thought helps shape every thought and action after. An example might be if your replaced image is of the ocean, you will likely notice more ocean-related material in your life. If you think happy thoughts, you are more likely to see things that make you happy, etc. Try to use things that fit with the future “self” you imagine. I know it sounds a little cheesy, but it’s how our minds work. Think of how TPTB use media to shape consumers, use these types of things to your advantage. They are just tools to be used, so learn to use them and make your life easier and more productive. Those who wish to do harm often prey on ignorance and insecurities as a means of control just like most predators. So take command of yourself and make it more difficult to viewed as prey.

Changing perspectives can greatly increase your accuracy. Think how you triangulate a radio signal or any point of origin. You need three locations, when problem solving perceptions are your locations, use them to increase your accuracy. You can shift your perception by many means, old memories, changing tasks, sleeping, or pretending to be someone else are a few different methods. Note: longer periods before re-evaluating a problem will greatly increase the perceptional change. These perceptional changes allow you to see problems from multiple perspectives, increasing your understanding and accuracy of your surrounding and ultimately everyone. As understanding of yourself can lead to greater insight into others. For when you can recognize a problem within yourself, it’s much easier to spot someone going through something similar. So it is wise to view problems from as many perspectives as possible. As anyone that’s ever worked on a project knows mistakes are costly in time, your life is very similar. Simple early mistakes can cost vast amounts of wasted time later on to correct, especially after behaviors have been reinforced.

One of the most difficult parts of shaping ourselves is possibly to understand how we influence ourselves and our surroundings influence our behaviors. Little things we tell ourselves like "I couldn’t do that diet". Can severely undermine our ability to accomplish tasks. If you really think about it, it’s a simple thought followed by a action “dieting”. By telling yourself you can not, you’ve reinforced to yourself your own inability to follow your own thoughts, increasing your chances of failing should you ever try. Replacing these thoughts with something more beneficially or positive will make things much more fluid and overall easier. You really don't need to over do it, just a few times a day at first, it gets easier every time you try, just like every thing else. After awhile you don’t even have to think about the process, it becomes almost automated.

A word of caution for those who control their emotions too often, we feel these emotions for a reason, they help shape who we are “to become”. So keep that in mind, also when you train new parts of your mind, you can become extremely tired “exhausted” so don’t go over board and possible shut down. Train like you would with weights, in sets.



The path to controlling the universe.

Universal mind is similar to magnetic, thoughts attract and repeal other thoughts. Think electromagnetic as thoughts control the energy of the body and spirit “chi”. Which I believe is similar to energy created from the soul causing friction on this dimension. This is one of the tools we can use to transverse this great expanse.


How to control you mind (thoughts and emotions) .
Thoughts and emotions are tools to be used to help create you into the person you want and need to be. Remember they are just thoughts, the more you try to control your thoughts the easier it becomes. After awhile it takes almost no effort or thought at all. You would be amazed at how easy it is, once you start trying. What you think or feel can have a profound affect on how you think and feel. If you think monster trucks you are likely to see monster trucks. If you think depressing thoughts you are likely to see things that make you depressed. What you think can help shape perceptions, perceptions increase accuracy “think multiple sources of conformation”. So when you replace thoughts with more positive thoughts, be mindful of the adverb. Be careful what you “wish for” or in this be careful what you “think of” in this case.

Memories or images are how I normally help emotions along. Keep in mind, the more profound “crazy” the image, the more likely the mind will remember or recall the image or experience. While you may not directly be working on memory training, it has a correlation, similar to how working on Chi can often lead to better muscular control, as most people tend to slightly confuse the two while learning. Memory tricks and exercises are similar in that aspect and can help with controlling your thoughts, as you will be using similar thoughts, its kind of two for one deal. There is a lot of correlation, so once you learn one method the others become much easier.


How to obtain a photographic memory (eidetic mind) by training?
Store memories in a filing cabinet inside your head. I have mine as a giant circle library full of filing cabinets, which spin around like the revolver of a gun. So if I wanted to remember something about a cat, I would think of that drawer and all of the thoughts associated with it that I’ve stored there, should be near by and easier to remember. Think of how things are stored on your computer hard drive. Whenever I’m done storing something I spin it like I would the chamber of a gun. This helps store similar memories together making it easier to recall those memories. This also trains that part of the mind to be more effect at storing and recalling, through practice. Also using the principles used in visualization memory techniques, using more elaborate or insane images help with remembering and recalling those memories.


How to control your body/energy (chi and muscles)
Chi’s main flow is from the scrotum, up along the tailbone, up to the spine, then up the backside of the skull, where it spreads out into the upper area of the mind. If, the flow restricts around the neck tilt your head slightly forward. The front channel starts at the tip of the tongue and moves down along the neck, chest and ends in the stomach area. These are the areas in which we can practice moving that energy. You can do this by focusing on an area of the body and channeling your energy into a focal point, the tongue is an excellent place to start to feel tingling, however any body part will do. I imagine all of my blood/energy “life force” flowing into that area. After a few tries, most people often experience a warm or tingling sensation, once you have it try moving it along your energy channels. This can also help you train your body, as you’re gaining more control over your body. Remember when you touched a 9v battery to your tongue, try distinguish between the memory and the chi.

Adding on to this, you can try moving random muscles in your body, as you advance you can try more difficult ones. For instance just poke a spot on your leg and try only to move the muscle in that one spot. Using thought projection you can also visualize relaxation or warmth into sore muscles, this a lifesaver for me. To add to this further you can move a healing focused Chi energy there as well when you understand the difference enough between the three, thought, body and Chi. Ultimately this will lead to things like having greater control over your body, even your own heart beat etc.


How to control your spirit/energy (Astral "thought" projection)
What I do when I feel a presence I don't want around. I ask it to leave in my mind and push that thought away from myself towards it sometimes taking on a parental tone or feeling can help. If I feel a presence that continues to bothers me, I take on a forceful feeling, similar to tempered anger and push it away from myself in it’s direction. You can also push yourself away with the same forceful thought. If it escalates you can use more forceful feelings to push at them. Avoid using anger against anything, it's fine to use it to temper other emotions though. Pushing thoughts through smaller areas increase the force of the thought. Think of water flowing through a narrow pathway.

How to master your dreams
Lucid dreaming is simply realizing you are dreaming while you are dreaming. The easiest way I’ve found is simply paying attention right before you go to sleep. Telling yourself to remember can work if you don’t have too much going on in your mind or are on good speaking terms with yourself. As mentioned previously, something you know very well can help. Think Inception here, use something you know well, even your hands will work. Try to interact with the details or scenery of the dream as much as possible. If you do have sleep paralysis, you can use this as your link to the consciousness. Because if you have difficulty moving in your dream for no reason, it’s likely you trying to move your body. Focusing on your hands or arms is another good way to remind you it’s a dream. Change views often while paying attention to detail what you’re looking for is anything out of place. Your mind will likely make the shift mostly itself, you may need to nudge it along. You tend to wake up a few times while trying, but it comes eventually.

Priming dreams, is building or constructing a dream prior to falling asleep. This is also the easiest place I’ve found to learn to practice controlling your dreams, just before you head into a dead sleep. Some of the more difficult things to grasp will likely be those that break the laws of reality you know. Flying, walking through walls, teleporting, once you conquer one the others are easier to become. The more difficult part is realizing it's a dream, once you do you can even change the dream construct "environment". Sleep paralysis is your mind trying to move your body, which is has shut down the motor controls. Spend a little time while your are barely conscious to reaffirm in your mind, you move with thought.

Dreaming what you want with out lucid dreaming and achieving accuracy is a difficult venture. Accuracy is achieved using multiple sources and so it will here as well. Certain memory tricks like visual association might help construct a dream. These normally string together images similar to what you want to remember, to help you remember multiple things. The crazier the images the easier they are to remember. For instance, to remember peach, banana and an apple. I might picture the peach fighting the banana and it starts peeling the banana. Then the apple jumps from the top rope of a ring and takes out the apple.

Telling your subconscious to do something works well if you aren’t to conflicted. For instance if I wanted to fly in my dreams I would just think or verbalize to my subconscious “I would like to fly tonight”. Phrasing can be important here as the subconscious may misinterpret things, so try to keep them simple at first. There are also objects you can use, for instance if you wanted to remember to fly in your dream, perhaps a feather under your pillow, this works well when used with the previous method. You can also use other objects, like a watch or something on the nightstand. It’s best to use something you are very familiar with.


How to become natural gifted? (Savant)
Can you become natural gifted or a savant by changing your perception? Learning something efficiently, or natural skill is understanding the information you are perceiving and how to use that information. We see this all the time, some people are just better at certain things then others, these people understand how they relate and interact with this environmental. Things you can try to help yourself along,. Try writing with your opposite hand, focus on how you do it with your natural hand, and shift your consciousness so it feels natural. This will be easier for those of us who were forced to write with opposite hand. It doesn’t have to be your hand, anything you’re comfortable with, throwing left handed? When you focus, really try to visualize how you do it the other way and take the most natural approach you can, imagine you’ve done it your whole life. Remember they are just thoughts, one of the easiest things you can do. Memory tricks and training help a lot in being able to visualize and remember what you’re trying to learn/mimic and kill two birds with one stone. Centering yourself, or as some call it “The Zone” is a great stepping stone into this train of thought. Granted this is only one small step towards that goal, but it could make learning new things easier in the future.



Free – the freedom to think and feel what we want.
Will – the will power to make that thought a part you.
And by doing so, make it a part of the world we know

you are insane.

OP you are not insane. Its just that everyone else in the world is insane, and trying to steal your magic hat.

And when you spread your arms you can adjust the strenght + damage reduction centered to specific areas.

you are not insane, you are becoming IN Sane

Apparent extreme fracture/division in your personality.

Without unity, this conflicted scenario you experience will diverge further.

Please seek experienced help in an attempt to unify your diverging constellation of sub-identities.

Seriously you think I'm crazy for that?
That's just a mix of martial arts training, memory thought training and lucid dreaming techniques. Now the other stuff, I couldn't fault you or anyone for thinking similarly. It is one of the perceptions I know, granted it's easy enough to change. Perceptions are just a persistent thought often created through repetitive thinking shaped by the environment or people around us.


But point taken I've been spending to much time in my thought's. It's time to focus on more physical things.

Understanding perspectives. (I think there for I am)
Perspectives help the subconscious mind reason and the previous techniques are tools to help achieve that. Say you wanted to look at a cup, to get a better concept of what you were viewing. You could walk to another place to view the cup or perhaps you could pick it up and feel the cup. In our mind we use perceptions to change our point of view and emotions to hold that thought, similar to how we see and hold the cup. By doing this it leads to a greater understanding of what we are experiencing which leads to fewer mistakes. The more understanding we have of our surrounding, generally the easier things become for us. Similar to smoothing a stone so it rolls more efficiently, your tempering your thoughts and emotions against life, shaping yourself so you roll through life more efficiently.

A warning, over thinking can lead to insanity Or as others might suggest becoming possessed by the collective mind. Also focusing on the subconscious will contribute to an introverted personality, as focusing too much on the conscious mind may cause an emotional stunted personality. To shift your perspective to something more conscious friendly, focus on things that cause you to interact with life, talking to someone, hobbies, sports, details etc. Physical activities kill several birds with one stone. Not only will the physical activity send chemicals to help change your thought patterns. Your thoughts and actions will as well, plus you'll get exercise. Like cooking in a kitchen, try to find other things that are similar to what you are already trying to achieve. With just a little extra effort, you can advance several things at once. And this way of thinking becomes habitual forming, You’re also helping to promote good habits to form instead poor habits, like dominoes they all fall into place if you know what you are looking for and take the extra time to plan for it.

I think it’s for me on this thread as I’m on the fringes of reality. I mainly wanted to toss in that last little warning about over thinking.